I've heard a lot of people say "I thought it was love, but it was just the idea of love"....so....

Question

So how do you tell the difference?

These are wonderful answers so far. Now I've got one more question.

How do you ensure that you are truly in love with them as you are today 10 or even 50 years from now?

Answer 1

I had to give you a star for such a wise question! Indeed, and it is very smart of you to be concerned about the difference. There are several stages to building a relationship. Most ppl don't consider this and that's why they end up saying----"If I'd known then what I know now---!" There's the "Dating Stage" and after that comes the "Courting Stage." The C/S is more advanced and serious than the D/S. It implies both parties are now thinking about marriage and the responsibilities. As two ppl. make the transition from dating to courtship, they become more and more involved with each other and less and less concerned with outsiders. To a degree, they live in a world of their own and prefer one another's company to that of anyone else. They both experience intense feelings of happiness.
Many ppl rush hurriedly past the courtship phase, right on into premature intimacy. Hasty decisions during this time lead eventually to a break-up or divorce. Courtship offers a testing period to determine whether or not a couple is ready for marriage and whether they really love each other. It's a time to test each other's disposition and personality.
If you are interested, e-mail me and I'll give you 12 personality traits to look for in a potential husband.

Answer 2

When you realize youre not in love with the man, but with the LIFESTYLE of being in love. You do everything together, its just so romantic, the best thing that ever happened to you. Then through whatever means you grow to realize that you either dont even know anything about the guy, or he wasnt who you thought he was, perhaps bc you were turning a blind eye. A family member was so in love with being in love and the idea of having a baby. Thing is, she spent more time planning the ceremony than thinking about the relationship and the future. She was so afraid of loosing that idea that she did a lot of things she wouldnt have normally done to keep that idea.
Sometimes I dont know whether she was so desperate to have a normal family and a baby that she knew and didnt care, or if she was really that blind with her idea of love and marriage. Neither one of them knew a whole lot about the others past before marriage. And I mean past in general, not exppl.
Unfortunatly, most ppl dont realize this until people have already been hurt. Often times it is being hurt that makes us examine things and see the signs that we either ignored or was blind to.

Answer 3

The whole "idea of love" concept is how I finally realized I felt about my ex-boyfriend. When my current guy and I started going out I was waiting for the part where I got sick of being around him 24/7 or started feeling like I had to do everything he felt like doing but could suggest anything myself...basically everything about my relationship with my ex that I didn't like. But so far it hasn't happened.

Te biggest difference is that I usually told my ex I loved him, not because I wanted to but because if I didn't he'd get mad or upset. But now, with my current boyfriend, I can't help but tell him I love him.

It's lots of little stuff that have made me realize the difference between the 2 relationships and understand that I wasn't really in love with my ex. I wanted to be, but I wasn't. Now I know I'm in love. I think even if I didn't have my ex to compare, I'd still know. It's one of those things that if you stop and think about it for a few minutes, you'll know.

Answer 4

idk,,i think its really sad,you get married becouse you love and respect that person and want to be with them forever right,i think this is mostly becouse of women? one day they love you the next day, year they cant stand you,just look in the news papper you'll see most marriages dont last more than 2-3 years now, thats sad, whats going on with this generation,yes things are great and new when u first date or get married but that newness is going to ware off right,, thats when real love starts, people to day dont give it enough time, or when the going gets tough there gone!!!! good question

Answer 5

In order to tell the difference if it is real love... it should be "sustainable"...through the years... you are together not only because you're happy but also through the trying years of problems, sickness and so many things that human beings go through life.

Answer 6

"And for the main area, human beings look to love their fiction as unhappy and unlucky as genuine existence. happy endings frustrate maximum folk, although if or no longer they like it or no longer, although if or no longer they like to confess it or no longer. And why shouldn’t it frustrate us?" i in simple terms won't be in a position to purchase this undemanding premise. i do no longer think of "happy endings frustrate maximum folk" in any respect. in fact, i might say the acceptable opposite it genuine. happy endings are why Disney is honestly certainly one of the biggest, richest, maximum useful companies on the face of the planet. human beings like characters to go through alongside the way, in any different case the tale is notably uninteresting, yet they like an ending that justifies the struggling, makes all of it worth whilst. Heroes beat the villains, knights rescue the damsel, abode remedies the affliction, Perry Mason gets the conviction, E.T. unearths his family individuals returned, Ewoks sing an demanding song of occasion, although. the full of maximum sitcoms is fixing a difficulty in 0.5 an hour. much extra (useful) video clips, books, and performs, end happy than unhappy. depressing endings in elementary terms artwork for united states of america track over-whiney indie p.c...

Answer 7

When you view your life through the prism of experience, it just become apparent.

Good luck.

Answer 8

when you are both completely happy with each other and there is just no doubt. then it doesnt matter if it was real or just the idea. its real to the both of you so it doesnt matter.

Answer 9

That's the problem with us people sometimes....we just think too damn much.