Boyfriend going away for a few months.. how to stay positive?

Question

My boyfriend will be visiting his family for 2 months next year, and unfortunately his family is in another country :( He hasn't been back to see them in 8 years, and I understand the need to see them.

The question is how to stay positive while he is gone, how to stay away from depression? He's my everything, as I am his. He's that one guy for me, he's The One.

What are things I could do or think to stay away from the depression of his leaving?

I like the learning their language idea, as I do need to learn it throuroughly! I know enough to talk some with him in it so that we can have our conversations somewhat private...

Vibrator.. haha.. Sorry, ain't that kinda girl.

And I don't think I'm going to lose him, he has an amazing job here that he loves and he has me. We've discussed the possibilities of the future, and he's more than serious about coming back to me.

Answer 1

Don't worry, it gets better over time. :) The initial separation is probably the most depressing time (along with anticipating the separation I guess), but once that passes, it gets better. I'm not saying you'll stop feeling sad, because it tends to come back whenever you're not doing anything (that's what happens for me at least), but yeah.

The key is to just stay occupied. Go out with friends, catch up with some old friends, read books, watch movies, draw, exercise, go out for a jog or a bike ride or whatever, get more focused in school and/or work, do ANYTHING that has to do with your hobbies and interests... basically just try to make the very best out of it. It also makes for some good stories to share with him when you talk, so he won't be the only one telling stories. :D And he'll feel better knowing that you didn't sit around depressed all two months.

Here's something I found really effective with cheering up: You could also start a personal project to surprise him with! When he leaves, start working on something. Make sure it's something you can't just do within one day or week, so that you can help the two months pass by. Knowing you're doing something for him and anticipating how surprised he will be definitely helps with cheering yourself up. :D If you can't think of anything big, do something simple, but do it day by day until he gets back. (Maybe something with writing?)

OR! Speaking of writing! You can also make a promise with him to do something together. When one of us goes on vacation, we promise to write a letter to each other at the end of each day, about how our day went and everything. Then when we finally see each other again, we exchange letters. Maybe you could try that! It gives you something more to look forward to. ;)

Haha whoops, I wrote so much. Got a little too excited. Sorry about that.

But anyway, good luck and chin up! He'll be back before you know it!

Answer 2

You have two choices. Spend the two months miserable or spend the two months happy. Its simple. Since everything you'll be "feeling" will begin in your mind then you have the power to accept what is and enjoy yourself no matter what.

Allowing someone to become your everything does not make for an enduring and healthy relationship. Use the two months to discover more about who you are and therefore you'll have more to offer. Being needy is not very attractive. And that doesn't mean that you can't love him, miss him and look forward to seeing him again.

Have fun doing things that you wouldn't normally do with him. Try doing some different activities such as: spend some time with girlfriends or family; reading; exercise; try new recipes; write a diary of your feelings. Experience the "withdrawal" and come out victorious and strong.

Answer 3

Well it's hard, but you just need to try your best to have fun and make the best of every day while he's away. Guys don't like mopey girls, they like strong girls who are able to put a smile on no matter what. I know it's not the same but at least you two have Facebook, phone calls, and maybe skype to keep communication going. Cheer up, it's not forever. Spend time with friends, family, doing things that you love and it will help time fly by.

Answer 4

A great piece of advice someone once told me.. you read the same book that interests you. and every night you talk about it. it helps keep you on the same page. it helps bridge the gap, but you both have to be committed.
also pick a day you always have to talk. make it an appointment so you still feel you are connected

Answer 5

If your boyfriend's family does not speak english...why not make an attempt to learn their native language. That would mean next time, you could come along too.

Answer 6

hang out with the girls some. and make sure its known that you are not available because guys like me will try to sneak in for the rebound. plan for a surprise party for when he gets back and that will help you stay positive.

Answer 7

well dont think of it as any thing more than seeing his family, but as long as you keep your head up and stay positive that is all you really need.....contact every so often is a given. but always remember just have fun and you never know who is the one for sure till you actually get married and know how they really are.

Answer 8

Find a charity to work for or find someone less fortunate than you and help them out with whatever you can.

Maybe like an elderly neighbor that could use some company or his/her lawn mowed.

The bottom line is to get out of your misery and help someone with theirs.

Good luck.

Answer 9

try to learn their language so next time you can go to, also for this time, make sure he calls everyday or you call him, have long conversations on the phone, hang out with your girl friends to take your mind off of him and try to enjoy yourself!! there's no reason to get depressed!!

Answer 10

Sorry but I have a feeling that you are going to lose him.