I'm in the same boat, and live about 200 miles from my kids for the time being. I see em once a month right now, and have had to travel alot for my job of the last 7 years.
Do you worry that the picture they have of you is not accurate and fed that direction by a bitter x wife and former inlaws?
2007-12-08 18:32:03 · 7 answers · asked by Zipperhead 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Yeah box o' rain... that's why I'm movin over there... otherwise, I'd be back on the beach in Australia spraypainting beach bunnies with sun tan oil.
I'm trying to find out if there are other's in the same boat.
2007-12-08 18:40:48 · update #1
I am obviously not a Daddy.....
But I do have experience from the child end of this type of situation.....Daddy lived in NY and Mom moved us to TN.....Exactly 1,000 miles from his driveway to ours....Sometimes I went 2 years without seeing him.....But, there were cards, letters and phone calls.....and I knew in my heart he loved me.....and trust me when I say Mom was bitter.....
Love has no boundaries.....time and distance cannot even conquer them.......I love my Daddy....and miss him terribly....He died over 15 years ago......and he is still a part of me.......
I can't help it either every time I look in the mirror.....I see his face.....
Peace.
2007-12-08 22:33:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Heres my version of dads who live 200 miles away from their children & only see them once a month & its not gonna be what you want to hear but to bad! Dads who visit their kids once a month shouldnt call themselves dads, ugh, a father who loves their kids would work at a gas station & live in a gutter if thats what it took to be near his kids, sir, your children are only gonna be kids once, & this is a time when it is so important for you to be close to them, so why not move?Why not prove to your ex-inlaws n ex-wife that you are gonna be these kids father from here on out? You cant father them 200 miles away & bond with then once a month, if you do you will eventually lose your children, that is if you havent already? I have two kids n let me tell you what, I would climb mountains walk thru fire & yes even move 200 miles closer to be with my children & if it means losing a good job & income then so be it, cause at the end of the day their is no amount of money that can pay for the happiness of my kids!
2007-12-09 09:14:24 · answer #2 · answered by penelope 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a divorced parent and you would be surprised by the conversations my children tell me they have with their friends who have dads in your position. No matter what well poisoning is going on, your kids love you very much. They think about you, they brag about you, and they do things to be like you. This occurs even when a Mother will not hear a father's name mentioned in her presence due to prior animosity. The children make their own decisions based on their own observations and talking bad about the other parent does not have the desired effect. Instead it only causes a resentment focused solely toward the trash talker. Give your children some credit. They are giving it to you. :)
2007-12-09 02:44:09 · answer #3 · answered by fantagirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As a divorced woman with children that desperately crave attention from their dad I would say be as involved as possible! In my situation we are both the kind of people that will never bad-mouth each other to our children. I know for certain that kids want input from both parents and it is important to be able to get along with your ex well enough to communicate about the children's well being. Do what you can to set the picture straight and be there as much as you can.
2007-12-09 03:31:03 · answer #4 · answered by dizzkat 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No matter what, if you want to do the right thing, you need to live closer to your children and be an be an active part of their lives.
You cannot do that from 200 miles away.
Good luck.
2007-12-09 02:36:53 · answer #5 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only once a month? Dude...
Whether your ex talks trash about you or not doesn't matter. What is going to eat you up is wondering if you see the kids enough, if you're engaged with them enough, or if they are going to start believing the trash talk.
Time to move closer to them, take the job hit if necessary. You'll need it for long term peace of mind.
2007-12-09 02:52:06 · answer #6 · answered by a_shrubbery_knight_of_ni 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love your children; and they love you too; then other than visitation you can keep your relation live without meeting them.
call them, talk to them, if they anser,
ask them if they have any problems, solve it if you can;
guide them
send `em gits
give them surprise.....
just make yoru ex jelous, show you love more than her.
2007-12-09 02:41:15 · answer #7 · answered by 498A_Crusader 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋