its weird im very confident around people but for some reason when it comes to guys i get really nervous...idk why....for some reason when i guy tries to talk to me or somethin i get really nervous...or if i do give them my number or something i will avoid talkin to them...idk why...could someone help me!!!
2007-12-08 18:26:06 · 5 answers · asked by hot_thang87 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
hey rockstar ur right i didnt have a father figure while growin up...and ive been wondering to myself could that have something to do with it....
2007-12-08 18:44:23 · update #1
Well, going in two different directions......
If the father figure is the reason (and I don't know all the details...this is merely hypothetical), you might have an inner fear that ANY guy that you get close to...you'll lose. Either by driving them away yourself, or by simply "losing" them. Either way, you have an inner fear of that, hence, you try to avoid it from ever happening.
On the other side of the coin, but maintaining the same general principle, your confidence around others might have you wondering if guys see it as an overconfidence and might scare them off. Because your brain is already three steps ahead of your actual actions and feelings, you act out a scenario in your head quickly, throw up your defense mechanism, and question yourself after doing it.
My advice?...Talk yourself into picking a test subject (for lack of a better term) and letting your actions flow freely from within. Don't attempt to hinder the process before it can even get started. Some guy might be missing out on a very nice girl, and, conversely, you might be missing out on having a genuine guy figure in your life....
Good luck.
2007-12-08 19:20:13 · answer #1 · answered by imrt70 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Let me ask you this. The people that you are confident around are they friends of yours or are they strangers. We tend to be more comfortable and open around people that we know. When we meet new people we are thinking to our selves I wonder if they will like me. I hope that I look okay. I hope that I don't say something stupid. With all this talking going on in our heads it is hard to make conversation. What I suggest is this. The next time that you meet someone new tell you self that you are good just the way you are. That you like who you are and how you present yourself. Tell yourself that you are not going to worry about what the other person thinks about you. If they like you thats good but if they don't oh well at least you didn't compromise who you are to make them happy. Good luck to you. You can do it. Just take a deep breath.
2007-12-08 18:54:01 · answer #2 · answered by D and G Gifts Etc 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What help?You have identified the issue and you also know what is to be done.The doing part rests with you.A common sense approach would be, start small(Talk about current news,weather or whatever) and then gradually move to bigger topics(involving personal views or opinions).Most guys(as you shall discover by and by) are simple people looking for some company and not expecting a moon.From today onwards,make it a point to give some guy a ring and say,Hello.It's really simple(and you know it too).Good luck.
2007-12-08 18:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by brkshandilya 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're only human..happens to everyone especially when the guy is someone you really like.Just relax...find something simple to talk about or things you have in common and once you quit thinking about being nervous...you'll find you're not and won't even realize it.
2007-12-08 18:35:21 · answer #4 · answered by Janell T 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you never had a father figure in your life?
or maybe it's the simple fact that your not so confident as you say you are.
2007-12-08 18:34:43 · answer #5 · answered by RockergurlSoS! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋