My 13 year old daughter is failing school!!!?

Question

She no doubtly has the intelligence to do the work and pass, but she herself will come out and tell you that she's lazy!! I have tried everything to motivate her from grounding her, bribing her, talking with teachers, signing her homework, etc. I'm seriously at the point of not knowing what else to do and I'm afraid that if this keeps up, she'll eventually drop out of school. In most of her classes, she does ok, but could do better. What raises a red flag for me is that in one of her strongest subjects, Social Studies, the teacher seems to have it out for my daughter and she now has a 17% average in her class. I have tried to meet with the teacher, the guidance counselor, the principal, and still haven't got anywhere!! What should I do?

She has been tested and she was found to be an average student. I wasn't an average student, I was the geek of the class!! lol I sometimes feel bad because I feel that she is always trying to compete with how I was in school. I keep telling her that as long as she does the best she can, that's good enough for me. Her long term goals are to either become a chorus/music teacher or work in acting, so she doesn't take school seriously. She goes to socialize and check out the hot guys!!lol Yes, I have even tried counseling. Any other suggestions?

Answer 1

Put her in an acting and music school. Where these two subjects are the main curriculum and the other course work is taught in relation to these subjects. She will be around peers and teachers devoted to these subjects. She will excel because this is what she wants.

Answer 2

Have you considered the possibility that maybe she is super smart? Have you had her tested? Maybe she is under stimulated and just bored. This happens a LOT with children with high IQ's. I remember my mother saying the same things about me right through high school and into college. I graduated 320s out of 350 in high school, mainly because I was so bored with what the teacher was saying that I literally wasn't interested (often mistaken for lazy). It's not easy being smarter than your teachers, and KNOWING it. My teachers simply couldn't move fast enough (without losing the other students) to keep me interested. When I got to college I found it much easier to stay motivated because the pace increased, the subjects became for difficult/challenging, and the professors were experts in the topics they spoke about as opposed to the college mediocrity that populates most teaching positions in our schools these days. My suggestion is to have her tested to see if perhaps this could be the reason she is under motivated. Good Luck

Answer 3

There are a few things that could be wrong:
1. She may have a learning disorder. There are many disorders that she may have, you might want to get that checked out.
2. She may be distracted. A cute boy? etc
If this is her first year of junior high she may be STRESSED!

What can you do?
1. She won't do her homework if she doesn't want to do it. So: Try to make her do it. Make sure she knows what will happen if she continues failing.
2. Try helping her with her homework!
3. There is a chance that she may have to be held back. If so, you might want to send her to a different school to save her from embarassment.
4. Don't yell at her, just tell her that you'll always be there for her. If she gets a 70% on a quiz, it may not be that good, but tell her how proud of her you are because she tried.

Give it time! Good luck!

Answer 4

I dont think that you should have an abortion. Yes she is very young, however this will teach her a huge lesson on how she needs to learn to be responsible. Maybe you could help take care of the baby or put her up for adoption? Also because if you give her the choice of having an abortion then she will think oh i can just do it again and I will just get an abortion no big deal.ALso she might end of getting some sort of STD and something bad will happen. I think that you should make her go to full term and teach her a lesson. Also maybe she will learn to be more open with you.

Answer 5

A child her age certainly has NO clue about how not having an education can affect her.
The US Department of Labor has statistics about how much people of a certain educational level will earn in a year and in a lifetime. Dig up these stats and show them to your daughter.
With my son, anytime we drove by someone doing a dirty, physically difficult job, he'd hear, "Stay in school".
I used to tell my son, "The better you do in school, the more choices you will have later". I held up the example of myself by telling him I'd be a veterinarian or physician today if I'd done better in school. Fortunately, I fell into a profession I enjoyed, but I lucked out.
My son is now doing what he's always dreamed of (he graduated from a hard-science program at university and with high honors, to boot).
Every kid has currency. Take her stuff away from her; the iPod, the computer, the phone, her favorite shoes, etc.-- even her bed, if necessary.
Keep working on the school administrators. Don't bother stopping into the office or calling; if it isn't in writing, it means nothing. Write and send a registered letter to the principal so you have proof he/she received it. If you continue to have problems, send a copy of the letter AND the receipt from the registered letter to the superintendent of schools in your district.
Tell your daughter you will let her do community theater, but only if she maintains at least a B average.
Her dreams of being an actress are great, but thousands of kids move to LA every year in search of their dream. It's not realistic. She needs something to fall back on. If she isn't academically ambitious, she can go to beauty school.

Answer 6

Try to get her motivated to what her career focus is?

Answer 7

find your local education experts or child psychologist.
they know it better