Sister is 12 and pregnant with twins?

Question

Only 12 and she is pregnant she wants to keep them but my mother said she will not have it and she will not tell us who is the father of the baby, I have a feeling it someone older over 18. I dont think she should keep the babies as she is not old enough to get a job. My mom will has her my little brother and her business and she can not take care. What can we do as we are not the parent to the twin boys when born so by law we can not put them up for adoption so how can we get the state to take them?

My mom will not change her mind my sister is due Janurary 10th and my mom hardly talks to her and also wont be there for the birth and doesnt want to even look at the babies she feels that it is not her responsabilty to even raise them because it is not. Plus we cant afford to do it at all baby food, strollers, crib, and everything else. I have my own child and one on the way so I cant do it.

If you only knew how kids are these days my mother is very strict and very disipline as well as my father. I volunteered for the boys and girls club awhile back in the kids where talking about sex and boyfriend and girl friend they where only like in 3rd grade.

I dont know how we can keep them if we dont have the money or means to raise them my mom and dad already have 6 other children under the age of 18. My moms business isnt going great right now so its primarly my dads pay check but he make good money but will also not talk to my sister as he feels she is the biggest mistake ever now.

Answer 1

Well I don't think your sister will be able to raise the children without your moms help. And personally I don't think your mom should. The best choice is for your sister to give the babies up for adoption. I can't imagine being twelve having sex willingly much less getting pregnant and wanting to keep the babies.

I have a whole slew of things I could say and would say but it isn't my place.

Needless to say your mom needs to check into the laws about what she can enforce concerning this pregnancy and the babies as your sister is a minor.

Answer 2

This is a very difficult situation and especially for a 12 year old. Her body is not ready to have a baby, more than likely she will have to have a c-section, unless the babies are small. There are so many people who would give those babies everything they will ever need, love and material things. I was abandoned as a newborn and adopted, my parents tell me I was so sick when my biological mother left me and they are so lucky to have me. If your sister decides to keep the babies there are many resources available in communities, there are support groups and even agencies to help with material things that the babies will need (and mommy too). I am a nurse on a Labor & Delivery floor, the youngest mother I have had (this year) was 13, she got pregnant at 12 and turned 13 just before her baby was born. She had a rough labor and ended up with a C-Section, but a healthy baby. If she is considering adopting the babies out, have her talk to the nurses on the floor or even a social worker to help her find resources. Once a girl is pregnant, she is considered emancipated (she doesn't need parental permission to do things anymore), so your mother isn't technically responsible. Good luck with this situation and I hope the babies do well (and your sister too).

Answer 3

You're sister is entirely too young to be raising twins. They should go to a family who can take care of them. Mom apparently has her hands full and I am sure twins were not on her agenda Your sister is 12, this alone makes her an unfit parent. Your Mother needs to step up to the plate and be a Mom and find out what is going on with her family. The first thing she needs to do is find out who fathered these babies. If he is over 18 then he should be arrested and thrown in jail. Sorry to say this but, where the hell is Mom and Dad, she is 12, how horrible. Isn't anybody watching the kiddies?

Answer 4

Depending on where you live the laws vary but here if a 12yr old has a baby she is the mother and legal guardian and even the mother has no say and can do nothing to force her to have her babies taken away. If your mum is really concerned maybe she can contact child services and they can chat with her about how she thinks she is going to bring up these babies with no income or support. Maybe Child services will be able to help your sister if she really wants to keep her babies.
Have you spoken to your sister about an open adoption?
I think that may work well for all parties involved.

Answer 5

I don't know the laws, but why can't she put them up for adoption? This situation makes me very sad. The babies deserve lots of love and a good family. I knoe where I live (california) there is a law that you can safely surrender a baby to a hospitol no questions asked within so many hours (48 i think) goodluck and try you best to make sure the babies get the best outcome possible.

Answer 6

i don't think a 12 yr old should raise a baby let alone 2, am sorry but the hard work ,the crying, the pain of yelling there lungs out when there sick n u not knowing what to do , the lack of sleep, money, insurance, my gosh am 24 and sometimes it gets hard for me, i would look into
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/ they have hot-lines and people that know how to help, i wish u n yr family the best especially those babies

Answer 7

Al I can say is that this story is absolutely revolting.
It's not even legal to have sex until the age of 16. And I didn't even get my period until age 12.
If I was your mother, I would have taught your sister better about being a lady. And if this happened, I would be really ashamed.

And I'm considered very liberal.

Answer 8

i do not think it is you or your mothers responsibility to determine where the babies go...parents always have a hard time when their children get pregnant,,,,it all changes when the babies are born.
this is america and its crazy how you guys act like the babies will nevr live past a day...someone needs to own up.
yes it going to be hard but we all have to make sacrifices in life sometimes, wether we are willing to or not.
Like i said this is america, there are TOO MANY PROGRAMS out there established for situations like this one!!!!!i hate it when peeople act like they do not know.
things like WIC, free daycare services and stuff, its bound to work out.WELFARE RING A BELL???????
never b afraid to use something.....we have those for a purpose, not to say she should spend her whole life on it but just till she gets back on her feet!
we all make mistakes some more fatal that others but we all have to live with them!!!!!!!
babies are a blessing, not everyone is blessed like that, i am greatfull everyday for mine!
Ps, its a lil too late for sex education now....someone should have stepped up and bin there for here, the whole point of having a sister is to have someone to talk to...a mother as well.....where were u guys when this all happened.???

Answer 9

Your sister is a minor, so your mother is still responsible for everything. Your mom will be questioned by the police eventually about whether or not your sister was raped, and your sister needs to put someone's name down as the father, so its really in her best interest to confess now. Its absolutely ridiculous for your sister to even consider keeping them. It would be a form of child abuse, because she can't provide for them financially for a few more years, and your mom is not around.

Tell your school nurse that she's pregnant. She can take it from there, contact child services, the police, whoever.

Answer 10

Contact a close cousin/friend/mate and see if anyone is willing to look after the babies as their own. Therefore the real mother can still see the babies.