Should I tell her or let it go?

Question

About 4 months ago, I met the love of my life. We both adore each other and have the most complete loving relationship of our lives.

About 6 weeks ago, I snooped into her email account. I don't know what possessed me to invade her privacy.

I deeply regret my actions.

Should I tell her or just let it go? How would you feel if your man did that to you?

Answer 1

Tell Her.. I KNOW its hard, but you have already admitted you were wrong, if she is the "love of your life" you will be honest, I mean its up to you, but I think she will get over it sooner or later, besides after you have talked about what you did and you know it was wrong as her if you can make a JOINED account and that you want to start making things "commited" maybe your relationship will further because of this lil mistake... I repeat LITTLE mistake, its not major you did kill someone or cheat or make rude jokes about her family, right???

Answer 2

If this is a new beginning .. it might be wise to NOT start your new relationship out with lies .. which this would be a lie by omission.

I would feel betrayed if my man did this .. but further - I would feel that my privacy had been invaded - and that I could not feel the safety of knowing that he won't be sneaking around behind my back going into my things without me knowing about it. I wouldn't like the feeling.

I don't know how you got into her email account - but breaking into it would be different than if the account was just opened up on a screen.

One thing to consider is that if you do not tell her now .. she may find out at some later time. Somehow, these tiny secrets have a way of being discovered.

If you do tell her -- it may be the test of your relationship. It truly does sound as if you are regretting it.

Every person would take this differently than another person.

You have choices. You must be the one to decide what the right thing to do is.

Answer 3

First of all, no one has a "complete loving relationship" after just four months. You are just beginning to know one another.

Which brings me to what you did. Obviously, you DO NOT have a great relationship, don't know her enough to trust her and now have broken a trust.

If a man did that to me, I would be very upset and not trust him anymore. Having said that, if you are not guilty of any offense, you also have nothing to hide either.

In this day and age of infidelity, when one has some valid suspicions, I say that is a time to look. But hopefully long before that, communication would be the order of the day.

Do you tell her? That is between you and your conscience.

Answer 4

As much as you'd like to let it go you should tell her. It's always better to be honest .Then to hold back a lie from the love of your life. It will hurt you in the long run. Besides if you tell her it shows her that your trying to be honest and that u don't want anything like a lie to come between the to of u. Explain why u did it and that you've regretted it ever since and that Ur truly sorry. Offer to give up your privacy of your computer to her. Just to show her how sorry u are. Trust me if she truly loves u she'll forgive u and won't bother to invade Ur privacy. Just don't do it again!

Answer 5

Both of you should have nothing to hide. So, I would ask myself the question "Why am I looking in her email?"

None of us are perfect, nor do we have perfect relationships.

I believe every 3 months our lives slowly change or take a new direction, if nothing changes in the 3 month period, then not much will change in the next 3 monthsl. But, if you want something to change you have to do something, or take action within the next 3 months to see a change in the 3 months after that.

I don't believe in New years Resolution, 1 x per year, I just do 3 mo checks.

Perhaps you are just checking your reality to see if what you still believe is so. Let it go...talk to her if you wish...lots to explore in life !!

Answer 6

It's really not a huge thing that you did. However, chances are she may feel as though she did something to lose your trust or something like that. If it wasn't bothering you, I'd say it would be something you could let go. But it is obviously taking a toll on you, so you should tell her. If she loves you as much as you say she does, she won't do anything severe. Good luck! Just explain why you did it, honesty is the key.

Answer 7

That would be a neurotic honesty on your part: what purpose would serve the relationship to tell her you snooped into her emails ? nothing, that would be foolish, she'd be angry at you, maybe she'd distrust you. Everybody check partners out, you are not the first person doing this, don't tell her, don't do it again unless you distrust her: you know what ? stop worrying too much over so little, enjoy your relationship. Case closed.

Answer 8

well of course i would feel bad...unless unless unless he apologizes deeply and really means it...so i think you should do the same...and if she really and truly loves you then nothing will be a big deal...she may feel mad at you initially but tell her innocently that you didn't mean it and eventually things will a lot more calmer...besides if you DON'T tell her then you will be possessed of doing a lot more similar things and you will always regret it AND you won't have the guts to tell her everything...so as the saying goes...a stitch in time saves nine...deal with your problems while they are still at its roots...of course she will be disappointed but mark my words...she will come back for you...if...if...and only if she REALLY loves you...

all the best!

Answer 9

First of all if you are jealous of her and what she does that is not a good relationship you are in snooping around into someone else e-mail. If you tell her she will be upset and if you dont you will walk around with guilt all over your face.

This is up to you not me

best of luck

Answer 10

iduno y u snooped either if you didn't have a reason but i think the question is did u find wat u were lookin 4.u must have been tryna c if she had anything suspicious goin on in her emails if u didnt find nuthn dont tell her it will only make her feel like u hav invaded her privacy,u did but theres no sense in causin a fight over it.its not that serious just dont do it again.