My friend introduced me to his brother named James. I hinted at me liking James so James flirts with me now. I want to have sex with him and dont know what to do.
I am 14 and understand the consequences that comes with sex. But I just cant wait.
Please dont tell me about morals and whatever.
PLEASE HELP ME!
oh and he is 15
2007-12-08 13:00:22 · 48 answers · asked by Yo Btches 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
a lot of these where harsh...damn respect me. i am 14 in the 11th so its not like i dont have respect for my self. ughh! i have so many mixed feelings.
2007-12-08 13:11:21 · update #1
a lot of yall was hatin on a sistah but i rather post a comment on her then go open mah heart out to a nicca on da streets. tough love i guess. but thanks.
2007-12-08 14:25:04 · update #2
NO. I don't understand how you just can't wait, AIDS is real can you wait to die? Teen pregnancy is an epidemic, can you wait to be statistic? a number in a welfare line? The list goes on but you already know the consequences.
Can is a matter of will, and I pray you chose the right thing because we all know you know the answer.
2007-12-08 13:44:56 · answer #1 · answered by luvlife 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, the answer to your question depends on many factors. How much do you know about STDs and protection? I didn't learn a lot of stuff - like the fact that you can get STDs from giving oral to a guy, that you're supposed to hold a condom in place during intercourse to prevent it from slipping, etc. - until I was in college. I would recommend reading a lot about safe sex and the various STDs before you make your decision.
Secondly, your own values are a big factor. Some people obviously treasure their virginity greatly, for religious reasons or other reasons. Just make sure that you are not going to regret having sex after it's all said and done because you can't take it back.
Personally, I lost my virginity when I was 13 to my 15 year old boyfriend. Though my reputation temporarily suffered, I don't regret it today. I'll be honest, it was just lust. We just wanted sex. But we were safe and knew what we were getting ourselves into. I'm 21 and he's almost 23 now, and I still talk to (and have a sexual relationship) with that first boyfriend. Not all first time experiences have bad endings (and, contrary to belief, it may or may not hurt - my first time wasn't painful). But, on the flip side, your first time can be painful, you can get an STD your first time, you can get pregnant, and your reputation can be ruined for a long time.
So yeah...just do your research and make a careful decision. The fact that you're asking for advice on here and not just making a quick decision and doing it is a good indicator to me of your maturity.
2007-12-08 18:23:49 · answer #2 · answered by Jessica 1 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'd say no, for one reason no one else ever thinks of.
At 14, you're still getting used to getting your heart broken every time you fall in and out of love. Getting your heart broken by someone you also had sex with just makes the feeling that much worse.
Stick to bases 1-3 for now, and get the hang of having heart break from those guys. That's my advice anyways.
2007-12-08 23:23:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
no you should not you should wait until you have dated a long time and you feel he is really the right one for you. There are all these girls that lose their virginity to these guys who don't even care about them and then the guy breaks their heart and could care less. Plus guys may think you are easy and call you a **** and every other name in the book. Do you really want any of this to happen to you?
2007-12-08 13:26:10 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you can wait. You just don't want to. Do you realize that james doesn't really care about you? He may like you but if you have sex with him, he wil disappear and start flirting with his next target. Talk to some older girls. They will usually say they regret having sex with the guy they chose as the first. Your virginity can only be given once. Wouldn't it be better to give it to a guy that truely cares and will be around. Remember the only guys worth having are the ones that sick around when they know there will be no sex.
2007-12-08 13:04:52 · answer #5 · answered by Enlightened One 3 · 7⤊ 0⤋
OK look I made that mistake and it was all good for a while but If could go back and change it I would do it in a sec. It hurts so bad if something happens with the 2 of you and you know that you gave that him and also he could still leave you and he could just be wanting that!!!! so be careful.
Ohh yeah we have been together for 3 years and i love him more than anything but I still have went thru everything I heave mentioned and I still would change it if I could because of that and in fear of that.
2007-12-08 13:16:15 · answer #6 · answered by Lisa De Marino 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
personally i don't understand why girls are having sex so young today. if you are in 11th grade and 14 (i am also 14 in 9th) then obviously you are smart, smarter than him so you have something going for you. only go out with the best, and have some class, you can show people you are a woman, but show them you are also a lady. having sex so young can have physciatric problems and you may not be able to concentrate on your academics. simple solution...wait! especially if you can't be mature and tell your parents because if you aren't mature enough to confidently tell them then you aren't mature enough to be having sex.
2007-12-08 15:27:38 · answer #7 · answered by LokiandThor 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes, 14 is wayyyyyyyyyyy too early. But if you're not concerned with the consequences, like getting pregnant, getting STDs, having to quit school, your parents being upset, go ahead. There are a ton a consequences, and I think you should wait until you are more mature and sure that you both like each other. Make sure James is willing to be committed to you.
2007-12-08 13:04:20 · answer #8 · answered by olivia 3 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Your questions was, "should a 14 year old have sex?" In my oppinion, the answer is no because even though you think you understand the consequences of sex like pregnancy and disease, there is no way you are ready for it emotionally. I understand that you think you are mature and are probably going to do what you want anyway, but I would ask you to reconsider. i was a 14 year old girl once, so I know what it is like and I promise if you wait, you will be glad that you did.
2007-12-08 13:06:07 · answer #9 · answered by I love sushi 4 · 5⤊ 1⤋
14 years old + sex = regret
i'm really not trying to be mean i am trying to take you question very seriously.
when you are 14 your hormones are RAGING and the want to have sex is very very normal. but you just have to realize that once you give you virginity away you can NEVER get it back, if you feel that having sex with this guy is the right choice then go ahead no one is stopping you.. but if i could leave you with one thing this is my advice to you just a little lesson of life.
*the kind of guy that will respect you, and wants to spend the rest of your life with, will respect your desicion to be a virgin, and think virginity is SEXY and CLASSY!*
2007-12-08 14:51:30 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋