I'm thinking like...Why am i with this girl... I throw my dignity away just to live with her under the same roof who her legal husband is as well.
I'm not in the position i want. or i think i should want. Argh just confused. I'm extremely uncomfortable sleeping with her especially when her legal husband is around. I keep asking her to get a divorce because we are together. At least a divorce would put in me a right place just to be together with her.
She and her husband are seperated. He does what he wants with his own life, she does what she wants with hers. But they still communicates with each other because they have a kid together.
Right now, i'm pressuring her to get a divorce. but she wants to wait till her house sells? is that even good actually?
2007-12-08 09:59:36 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm hoping this is a serious question. If it is, then:
1. Why are you dating a married woman?
2. Living with her, her husband and their child?
3. Does any of this sound like a good idea?
They will always be in communication as long as they have the child. How do you know she's legally separated? Where's the proof? If you're in a relationship where you have to pressure someone to do something, you probably don't need to be in it.
Aside from finances and an influx of money, there's no real reason for them to be living under the same roof. Even with the financial situation, you work that out and go your separate ways.
Here's the test: If your best friend presented you with this situation, what would you tell him? What about this situation say "Man! This is a healthy situation for me to be in!"
2007-12-08 10:08:16 · answer #1 · answered by Le_Roche 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Aside from the morality issue which I think has been well addressed by other posts here, I think she's telling you where you are in her list of priorities. Waiting to sell the house first??? Who ever heard of that since the purpose of divorce is to divide all the assets and liabilities of a couple. I'm afraid she's stringing you along, giving you a line which for some reason you feel compelled to swallow.
You know it's not a good idea to be with this woman. And is the question right? You are living with her husband and son?? You have no rights, no nothing there. Man, please, run for the border. If the man decides he doesn't like the idea of HIS WIFE sleeping with you in his house, guess what, he can fillet you like a fish and probably walk away.
Aside from the incredibly bad example for the child, aside from the moral issues, what is going on with you that you have allowed yourself to be put in this situation? Walk away and then spend some time figuring that out. You may have feelings for this lady (I'm being generous in what I call her) but she has no respect for her husband, her child or you.
2007-12-08 10:26:00 · answer #2 · answered by CGordo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
she has different priorities than you do. You want the marriage and love and she seems to place a higher priority on either the money for the house or perhaps she is even still trying to save the marriage. I think I would allow some distance to develop and start to go out with others. First, because you may wait forever for the house to sell and in at least my opinion, she places more value on things other than love. she may not be emotionally ready to move on so when the divorce is final she may find another excuse for not getting married then also. It is better than you move out and get on with your life. She can always change her mind about waiting if you move out but I suspect that she won't and you will be better off finding someone else.
2007-12-08 10:19:03 · answer #3 · answered by Al B 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow. You should not have getting involved with her. The best thing to do right now is to move out. It will not change your relationship with her. You guys can still date since she and her husband will get a divorce. This way, the situation will be a lot better than the one you are in. If she dumps you just because you moved out, then you know she does not love you.
2007-12-08 10:11:53 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
She does not need to wait to get a divorce...she can get her divorce and iron out the finances afterwards, It's called BIFURCATION.
You already know that it is a gamble to be with a legally married woman and your choices have gotten you into this mess...make some choices to get OUT of this mess...NOW.
2007-12-08 10:44:33 · answer #5 · answered by that judi 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have herd of this before, Best thing to do is let her know when she gets a divorce come look you up. My friend went through this and after he dumped her she and her husband got back together.
2007-12-08 10:44:02 · answer #6 · answered by john d 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is why you don't bother with married people. Even if they are separated....they're still husband and wife. Sounds like they're both hanging on for some reason...just let her go. There are plenty of single girls out there..go get one.
2007-12-08 10:04:22 · answer #7 · answered by Student Doctor House 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm confused...does the husband live in the house as well??? If not then maybe you all could consider buying him out. If he is living there then I would be really concerned.
2007-12-08 10:10:18 · answer #8 · answered by Who Knew? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not saying you can't remain dating her, but I wouldn't live with her until her divorce is official. You could find yourself in hot water especially if they are still married... what if they reconcile? I wouldn't want to live there either. Good luck to you.
2007-12-08 10:08:53 · answer #9 · answered by Nikki 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is still married!! You need to move out of their house.
2007-12-08 10:10:06 · answer #10 · answered by Torrey 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋