It's a relative, mother about 1000 miles away. Haven't seen them in 5 years. I have a couple real reasons which I do not want to use because it would hurt her (cost, they are under the influence of a nasty half sibling who I havent beat up since I was 15 and he an Army Ranger), emotionally and due to her health even physically. I'm just not used to lying and need one this time. Please serious answers only. I really need an excuse and a real answer to this. Kind of like the Smothers Brothers, she loves him more because he is a convicted felon, twice Dishonorably Discharged from the military (3rd time a General) while I am just a retired metrologist, volunteer at the VA, reserve sheriff officer and volunteer jr college teacher. Call it she always rewarded bad behaviour. And I was kicked out by her husband at age 10 to fend for myself, so no real love. Though I have tried over the years hoping for change. The half brother had a home till 19. Just not possible for me to visit.
2007-12-08 08:30:05 · 3 answers · asked by genghis1947 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
As a police officer, though out of my jurisdiction, my oath is still to report or prevent crime. I am certain that would result in me reporting a felon in possession of many firearms, illegal drugs (amphetamines) stolen property. And in this case my ignorance and remoteness leaves me with only unsubstiantiated reports. Seeing it and hearing it from the perpetrators, I would by oath be required to report it. Like the question given police officers, "If you saw your mother run a red light, would you issue her a ticket?" Like other officers admitted to police departments the answer to that is "Yes!" That's why I don't care to be at the same location to witness anything this time.
2007-12-08 08:37:39 · update #1
I do have a sister there I would like to see. The visit was arranged as a return leg of a flight to Florida. The half brother is always armed and loaded with drugs. And my mother lives with him at the cost of $3800 a month (I had heard $5500 before) I wasn't rejected by her. I was rejected and put out by her husband. My mother simply didn't care. And she has always supported dope using step and half siblings. I don't want anything from her as I know the sources of her money. Statute of Limitations here so I am out from my reporting obligation. And she is 89 has heart problems with a lasix pump, 2 strokes and anything but a soft excuse could prove harmful. That I don't want either.
2007-12-08 08:54:04 · update #2
My step sister gave me the solution I will use. Seems that I am going to come down with a bad case of flu on the Orlando to Phoenix flight. Rather than give it to her, I will continue home to Oregon. I didn't even consider that as I haven't had the flu since I was a freshman in high school. Pure genius.
2007-12-08 15:47:12 · update #3
This is a hard one: Ah.! the best and most truthful will be you simply do not have the money and you are unable to borrow the money because of being retired and not having any credit. And the way prices are today if you are like most retired people you have just about enough for one tank of gas a month if you are lucky.
If they offer to send you the money decline saying because of their past activities you will not be sure where the money comes from.
But she is your mother and it would be nice for you to go see one more before she passes away. You just might have to turn and blind eye to what your brother in law and sister are doing.
That is a rough situation to be in. You could maybe get a round trip ticket as such that you only have to spend a couple of hours there in the middle of the day at most. You can always say that was all you could afford.
Lots of luck on this one: It's rough.
2007-12-08 09:42:34 · answer #1 · answered by JUAN FRAN$$$ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are using a good rationalization to mask the reason you do not visit. You still feel the pain of rejection from the one person you should feel safe with. You are allowed to carry this with you, but it would be better to address how you feel and decide to be kind to yourself. You can't control the events, but you can be the best person for yourself. Just don't go. No reason. You will do what you want to do and you don't want to go. Simple.
2007-12-08 16:43:09 · answer #2 · answered by folklore 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when asked why you don't visit....ask if they will remove all illegal activity and/or illegal items in the home you are visiting. answer will probably be no. so willyour answer.
for me, i would answer, "because i just don't want to"
2007-12-08 16:42:07 · answer #3 · answered by Isabella S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋