Wives-How do you stop yourself from nagging?

Question

Did I learn this behavior from my Mom? Why in the world do I do this without even thinking about it?

Answer 1

Nagging is a learned behavior.One thing that women never learn is this:The more you nag the less we listen,then the nagging becomes self supporting.People respond to different things on many ways.You need to find out what gets a positive response from him and use that

Answer 2

By learning how to be thankful. By accepting who your husband is and not trying to change him. By realizing that marriage is some of the hardest spiritual work that you'll ever encounter. This goes much deeper than changing a behavior, it's how you look at your life. When you realize how precious and short our time on the planet is and you make your life about not only making yourself happy but the lives of those around you it's pretty simple.

Instead of nagging that he doesn't help around the house. Appreciate the fact that you have a house while others are homeless.

Instead of nagging that he works too much, be thankful that he has a job and is a hard working man.

Instead of nagging that he doesn't give you enough attention, realize that part of being a wife is teaching a man how to be tender and letting him teach you how to not drag emotions into everything.

The next time you nag, imagine if he was dead tomorrow. Would the thing you were nagging about really matter? Stop having false expectations. Set up your life so that you are both supportive of each other. Laugh more! Good luck :)

Answer 3

Ah, but you see, you are thinking about it, and yes most likely we learn it from our environment. Try to think of ways to ask for what you want with out nagging.....

I spend years nagging with very little result, and have spent the last several years just asking nicely, reminding gently, and trying to be patient. If it's something I can do, after a week or two I'll go do it.

Unfortunately, hubby still recalls the years of nagging, and so he will say that I'm nagging when I'm really not. LOL

Answer 4

I don't think it's a thing you learned from you mother. I am so opposite of my mom. She is layed back, cool, NEVER gets upset about anything.. and I have a typical Irish temper and fly off the handle, b i t c h and moan, nag, etc... I hate my behavior at times and I think I just realized "I AM A B I T C H "!
lol!!!

Answer 5

One simple word... Communication

There is a huge difference between nagging in order to get your hubby to start/stop doing something and letting him know why you would like it done. i.e. Asking him to complete extra cleaning tasks this week because you are working 11 hour days, and how it will help the both of you. I have found out that simply asking him to do something, and IF it does not get accomplished, to then tell him why it bothers my that he didn't do it leads to WAY WAY more productive results and less quarrels in the long run.

Come on ladies, treating your hubbies like 2 year olds.. do this do this do this etc is ridiculous

Answer 6

Husband's can be the ****** in the fam too. Naggers are controlling people. They always think they know best. They think they know how, when and where that things should be done. They pester others to do things in the time frames they want. They are impatient and perfectionist too.

To stop nagging, ask or tell once. Wait for things to happen, bite your tongue to keep from repeating yourself. If nothing happens, either give consequences or do it yourself.

Answer 7

Well....I think this is a learned behavior...so you can modify your own behavior. Instead of nagging him about something, make a list of things that need to be done and post it on the frig. If there is no action in a couple of weeks..ask him to look at the list. If it's something like leaving his clothes all over the place, or bad habits on his part, throw them in the front yard and he can take care of them when he cuts the lawn. Godloveya honey.

Answer 8

when you get ready to start up about something,walk into another room and think about how important it really is. if its something you can do,just do it. then leave little notes around on the things you CAN NOT do by yourself and ask him when would be a good time that he could help you do it. tell him you will get the things needed but he will have to help with the physical part of it. tell him you want to quit being a nag but he will have to help on his part of helping you out when you need it most.

Answer 9

I go to another room. Think about how I feel and what is going on. If your nagging about chores make a honey do list and let him know where it is and leave it at that. Mark things off as he dose them. If it is about other things how important are they to you to need to nag? He also needs to respect you and do the things you might ask of him. It might not get done in your time but, at least he dose them.

Answer 10

I don't stop nagging. That's what it takes sometimes for men to do what they need to do. Aaaand of course, when it works, and my hubby does things just right... he gets special rewards.. haha, in the end it all evens out. BTW, I don't have any clue why men think they don't nag just as much as we do, just about different things.