i love one girl before my marriege, but she married to other guy, after 4 years of my marriege i found her, we r close friend for the last 4 lears now, she has two beautiful kids, i dont want spoil her married life, but i love her so much i also got two kids, she is very close to me now, and i think she also love me noe, but we both knws that there is no future in our relationship, i am confused becaose i think i am spoiling her life and she is more attract to me rather then her family, i am feeling guilty now, but i love her so much that the day i dont hear her voice my day is not started and the day we cant talk i just figh with other people, she lives 442 km away from my home and i cant see her , we talk on phone, and if my good luck is there i cann only see her once in the year, we dont talk about any vulgar talk nor talk of love, we just talk casually, but i miss her a lot, can u people pls tell me wt to do, but one thing is sure i cant leave her, i realy love her, thanks
2007-12-07 19:30:56 · 10 answers · asked by friendsfree1900 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If you can't leave her... you need to leave your wife because that just isn't fair to her. If you don't talk of love, then how do you know for sure that she loves you? We can't tell you what to do... but you are committing emotional cheating on your wife if you continue this.
2007-12-07 19:36:06 · answer #1 · answered by Just Tryin' to Help 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
OK what is really sad is that you are more worried about spoiling her family and your not saying anything about being worried about your family. What about you kids? You did not mention anything about your wife at all? I mean just think about what you really want because even if you don't end up with this women, You obviously are not that in love with your wife for the fact that you are having such strong feeling for another women. Put yourself in your wife's shoes, I am sure that would hurt pretty bad. You need to be honest to her. And as far as the other woman she is married and so are you. That's all I am going to say about that.
2007-12-07 19:41:14 · answer #2 · answered by luv2smile1982 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You obviously want to be an honorable man. But you are prolonging the pain for both of you. If you both are not going to leave your spouses, then stop talking to each other. You need to give each other time to let your feeling for your current spouses return, or decide that your current relationships are not working.
Sometimes the feelings of love fade when you have lots of time to be together. The distance and longing for each other is intensified by being so far away. If you lived in the same city it would fade to some degree. Like your wife, and her husband. You both need to talk to counselors about your relationships.
For some very good help about this situation, go to: http://www.drphil.com
2007-12-07 19:49:43 · answer #3 · answered by Jeanne B 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's really difficult not be able to be with someone you love. It's a set-up for misery. Neither one of you can win. It's a losing game. Disappointment ahead, for sure. You don't really want good advice, as you don't want to give up what you have with her. You and her will take what ever crumbs you can get and that will get you thru for today. Not good. Guess you will have to let "things" run it's course and let it play out over the next few years until one of you comes to your senses.
2007-12-07 19:39:55 · answer #4 · answered by wildflower 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel the same way too but I love seeing Black women with Black men in a healthy happy relationship as well. I like the interracial couples because a lot of Black women are so stuck on staying with Black men that it's nice to see them stepping outside the box.
2016-05-22 03:20:36 · answer #5 · answered by kecia 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are married, so is she. This "love" is sin and you MUST stop talking to this woman. If you don't, it will destroy both of your lives, your spouse's lives and both of your children's lives.
Love is a choice, not a feeling. What you have going with this other woman is not love, it is lust and it is sin. You made a vow to love and cherish your wife as long as you both live. Now you must keep your vows.
2007-12-07 19:40:43 · answer #6 · answered by avidmark4 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sometimes who you end up with isn't who your suppose to be with. Maybe you should ask her how she feels. If it is as real as you say it is then something needs to give. Everyone has a right to be happy, and if you two do love eachother then you probably shouldn't be married to other people, and the kids would adjust, just talk to her about it and make a dicision and move on with your life.
2007-12-07 19:38:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
This is only going to end badly if you keep it up. I know you don't want to hear this but you have to stop it, stop thinking about her and yourself, think about her children. Don't be selfish and do the right thing.
Don't wreck a marriage, that's one the worst things you can do to people's lives.
Think.
2007-12-07 19:38:35 · answer #8 · answered by Ozzy L 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
4 1 Just leave your wife because this isnt fair on her!! 2. If the girl who you love you dont want doesnt love you too!! Leave her alone!!
2007-12-07 19:40:33 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just take your mind of her and love your wife
2007-12-07 19:38:02 · answer #10 · answered by hari 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋