Some mnths ago i met a guy online, we started chatting n spoke regularly. I then met him n we met for dina, the chemistry between us was amazing, i was totally comfortable with him. we then started seeing each other regularly.he was in the country on a contract job.he told me he was single but was not lookg 4 a commitment.
a few months later, coz of work issues, he had to quit and leave. just a day b4 he left he told me he was married n had a kid as well.
at 1st i dnt know how to react, i always had a rule not to see a married man n i had broken that rule (without knowing)...
when he left, i realised that i really liked him...we r still in touch over emails n chat. the funny thing is that now i feel like i wud still c him if he came back.
He says he cares abt me but he lied to me. he says his not happy with his marriage but not willin to leave his wife. shud i even believe this? is it wrong that i still like him? should i still be in touch with him?
what would u do if it was u?
2007-12-07 15:33:27 · 17 answers · asked by Swit Angel 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He lied to you.. end of story. You make your choices in life, and you chose not to be with married men, he took that from you.
If the marriage is so bad why is he not willing to leave? if he cares so much why didn't he tell you..
its ok to be friends, if that's possible go for it, if he wants more, you need to say no, you are going against your own values.
2007-12-07 15:39:43 · answer #1 · answered by vjustmehere 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
From the sound of it, this man doesn't even live in the same country as you! On top of that, HE LIED TO YOU! You never wanted to be the other woman and that is exactly what you have become by continuing to talk to him after he told you about his wife and kid.
It's not wrong to still have feelings for him because you had those feelings before you knew he was a liar and a cheat! But in my opinion, it is definitely wrong for you to continue talking to him! You need to tell him that you will no longer continue this relationship and the block his emails! He's never going to leave his wife and kid and he even told you that so what's the point in keeping the relationship going?
2007-12-07 15:42:30 · answer #2 · answered by terribrooke 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Feelings are just that, feelings...they are created spontaneously and there isn't much you can do about them. You can however, control your actions. You were lied to and that is unfortunate, hopefully the next time you meet someone you will check them out more thoroughly. If he is actually married (I am assuming you have no proof that he is) then you need to cut your ties to him and stop the emails and chat. He left you, and says he won't leave his wife, so you gain nothing by continuing to communicate with him. It will just feed your fantasies and keep you hoping. It will hurt for a while but it will get easier if you tell yourself your decision is final.
2007-12-07 15:45:28 · answer #3 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would cut all communications with him. He is married and anything you do with him is adultery. You already know he is dishonest, unfaithful and has no integrity. He has cheated on his wife with you and cheated on you by having a wife and not telling you. If you think this man, even if he left his wife for you, could ever be trusted? I think NOT! You have been totally used and abused. Find a single guy. Don't give your precious self to him until your wedding night.
2007-12-07 16:00:31 · answer #4 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he should've told you that he was married, whether he's happily married or not, when you guys first started talking. He obviously doesn't NOT like her enough to leave her, so I wouldn't waste my time with this guy. I know that's not what you want to hear, but I think it's probably the best advice I can give. He pretty much lied to you, by not telling you that he was married. I think he may just be wanting a mistress.
2007-12-07 15:39:07 · answer #5 · answered by Megan 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO! Honestly, if you are looking for a loyal and honest man do you think a man cheating on his wife as he has a kid is the guy? Think about it this way he lied to you and he is cheating on his wife, if he lefted his wife and you two got married, he could find another girl to lie to and say he is single.
cheaters don't always change.
keep that in mind.
2007-12-07 15:41:16 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
FORGET THIS GUY!!!!This is the age old story. He just wants to have his cake and eat it too. If he's cheating on her what makes you think he wouldn't cheat on you. Dating married people is just wrong!!! And I really do believe that what goes around comes around. Nothing good can come out of this. Get out and cut it off completely. You are just wasting your time. Look for someone who is nuts about you, not some loser husband and father who would do something like this! He decieved you, he lied to you.......how could you ever trust him!
2007-12-07 15:41:42 · answer #7 · answered by karenhjones 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is married, and a cheat, .. not a good combination .. so you should leave him alone.
The line about not loving his wife - is an age-old line that most men give about their wives when they have no intentions of ever leaving his wife.
He is staying with his wife, because he wants to stay with his wife.
If he didn't want to stay with his wife .. he would leave her.
He already cheats on her.
You would be wise to kick him to the curb .. and find you someone who is single .. and trustworthy.
2007-12-07 15:44:15 · answer #8 · answered by Tara 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At first, he lied to you, now he's giving you another story about his married and also he's telling you that he sin't willing to give up his wife. This is more than a fulish, get rid of him before is too late . lie is going to be a lie for ever.
2007-12-07 15:42:49 · answer #9 · answered by flowermieses 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
regardless of his happiness or lack there of with his wife, believe the fact that he is NOT willing to leave his wife. go back to following your rule of never dating a married man, you will respect yourself more in the morning if you do. stop the emails, stop any contact, let him sort out his life without you in it!
no it's not wrong of you to have feelings towards him, but it is wrong of you to act on them in any way until he is no longer married!!!
2007-12-07 15:58:55 · answer #10 · answered by celticbuddha 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋