English Deutsch Français Italiano Español Português 繁體中文 Bahasa Indonesia Tiếng Việt ภาษาไทย
All categories

my soon to be ex told me about her past, and it was way more than I could deal with.

Can people really change their sexual habits, or is sex like any other addiction (such as drugs, alchohol, food etc), where people only try to control it.

The things she told me I could never trust her. Advice please.

2007-12-07 14:18:28 · 6 answers · asked by baron d 2 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

6 answers

The only things that can't change are the spots on a leopard. Of course, people can change if given enough motivation. I myself have a friend who used to be a hooker but changed when she met the love of her life. They now have 4 kids and are very happy together. If you can't deal with it, then you need a lot of growing up to do. Get it into your thick head that she changed because she loves you. Your letting her down will only make her go back to what she was before. And then you will say you did the right thing because she really can't change. Now, THAT would be unfair to her. Grow up man!

2007-12-07 14:36:24 · answer #1 · answered by Maloy5 2 · 0 0

Possibly, it depends. Is she really addicted to sex as you say or was she just sleeping with men to fulfill something but could never find the thing she was looking for that made her feel complete until she met you. My hubby, was a complete ahole in his younger years, he slept around with a lot of women, but is completely committed to me and loves me whole heartedly because I really believe I was the only person to ever show him love and a stable relationship. Maybe that is the way it is for her. The question is, do you love her? What happened in the past, is the past. She trusts you enough to let you know about her past, something that she didn't have to tell you, by the way. Does knowing that information change how she loves and cares for you and treats you? In this relationship has she done anything to you to betray your trust or make you question her? If the answer is no, then do not hold her past against her. Everyone has things that have happened in the past that they are not proud of, including you i am sure. The point is people change and sometimes it takes a good person to make someone change. Just give it a chance.

2007-12-07 22:28:29 · answer #2 · answered by Melissa M 3 · 0 0

How sad, don't dump her because of this, people can grow up, go to counseling with her, and tell her what she told you made you feel very uncomfortable and use it as a method to start a deep level conversation...The grass isn't always greener on the other side, if you love her stay with her!!! She was being honest with you, and felt safe to open up with you...since she took so long to tell you it's probably because she is embarrassed, and that shows remorse...I would explore the fact that she did those things because she had low self esteem, Get a book on how to help her with it. Other wise dumping her will just devastate her, after she confided in you. My fiancee use to be a "HO" and he is so trust worthy i could leave him with supermodels and trust him!! He got it out of his system...

2007-12-07 22:31:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

No, most people rarely change unless their is a significant emotional life altering event.

Changing for a little while is possible but once the motivation to change becomes relaxed... thing will revert to the old ways.

To make lasting change, it has to come from deep inside the person who wishes to make that change. External influences rarely make lasting changes.

2007-12-07 22:49:16 · answer #4 · answered by Darren 7 · 0 0

You should dump her because she is too good for you. She deserves better.

Yes, people can change if they want to.

Good luck.

2007-12-07 22:22:22 · answer #5 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0 0

break up with her you may catch something...she spreads the wealth i mean death..lol and as for the guy who says she is too good for you screw him he is crazy..

2007-12-07 22:27:01 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

fedest.com, questions and answers