My mother is fighting me for legal guardianship of my son?

Question

However when I was having a nervous breakdown and she took him to help me out, she said she'd be waiting for me to get my life togeher, I should take as long as I need.

My son has bween with her for almost four years however I saw him, minimum once in two weeks and right now a lot more, three times a week. I work in Sales but I'm not making much. I just need time, and I don't understand why mother went so far, except that she's an orthodox Jewish individual and I am not.

I love my son, I will fight till I die, but I would rather even it out and have a good relationship with my family, settle it out of court.

Another, and last hearing is in January, I don't know if I will have enough time to get situated. I would like to go for Trial.

I have been the one to sign all the documents for services required for my son so far.

What are my legal actions?

I have an attorney, and in his personal opinion he thinks my mother is right. However, I have recovered from child abuse and I'm just starting to live my life agian. My mother knew that my intention was to take my son back when I'm together, and she said that's what I should do.

So far, I have made most of the decision for my son and his education such as services, etc. I am capable to continue doing so. I don't have much time though, I want to bring it to trial. I don't have much against my mother, she was helping me out a lot however its more complicated and I feel totally betrayed.

Answer 1

You mean your legal options? First, you need to establish a stable home for your son and show that you can support him.

He has been with your mother for 4 years and he has bonded with her. Your mother is providing a stable, religious environment for your son which is one plus in her corner.

If your mother gets legal guardianship of your son does that mean that she will keep you out of his life? If not, legal guardianship is just a formality.

If I were in your situation, I would want what is best for my son, not necessarily what I think is best for me. Visit with him as often as you can. Once every two weeks is not enough for a young child. You need to to re-establish your relationship with him before you remove him from your mother's care.

Be grateful to your mother for helping you care for your son while you are going through difficult times.

Remember, the human condition is never permanent. As your son grows up, I know that you will have a wonderful mother/son relationship whether if he lives with you or not.

Good Luck

Answer 2

So, so I understand that even though you were suffering from some mental instability you still maintained a relationship with your son, and you also did all the decision making for him?

Sounds like you have proven your ability to be a responsible parent, and if you have a psychiatrist or psycologist release that you have recovered, then your mother does not have much of a case.

The courts will typically rule on the side of the parent of the child if they are not unfit. You don't sound unfit, however I don't know enough.

I wish you luck. I would hate to have had my children taken from me, and I now have grandchildren who I would watch for as long as necessary (I am doing that right now) but as soon as my daughter comes to get him, she can get him. He's not mine, and she is not a terrible mother, neither are you.

Just be sure when you go to court that you do not lose your cool again, no matter what your mother may say. Write up a statement and stick to it. If she says something in front of the judge, make notes and come up with reasonable rebuttals for her statements.

DO NOT get angry. That will not help your case.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Child's best interest is one option -- but, it's going to be more than "all she has to do is show that it's in the child's best interests. . . "

Most courts today will NOT separate a parent from the child UNLESS that parent is unfit to raise the child, do to physical/mental abuse, or use of drugs . . . inability to keep a job . . . something along those lines.

It isn't often that the court will take a child away JUST because the mother is poor (if that were the case, people on welfare wouldn't have children).

The courts, however, depending upon how old your son is, may find that it would be more detrimental for him to be moved from the grandparent's home, emotionally, than it would be for him to not live with his mother.

Really, the court could go either way. I hope that it ends with the best interest of the child (not who has more money).

You may want to consider seeing an attorney through a legal aid service -- they often help with issues like this.

Answer 4

Quite frankly, all she has to show is that it is in the child's best interest to live with her. Given the past 4 years, you will have a hard time retaining guardianship. BUT, just because she gets legal custody does NOT mean you lose your parental rights. Keep in mind, however, that you may have to pay her child support. You should NOT go any further in this action without retaining your own attorney. If you don't believe you can afford one, contact Civil Legal Aid and apply for low cost or free legal services. The clerk of the local court and give you contact information.

Answer 5

Was she born Jewish? If so, you are or were too! All of that can be changed, I do understand, She has very "strong values", and there is Nothing wrong with that! She is looking out for her Grandson, and, never blame her, for where "she" is! She loves Him and you first, or she'd never be where she is! She wants you to be well! 100% well! Is that too much too ask, after "ALMOST 4 YEARS"? I don't think so! Take care and good luck!

Answer 6

HEY, think about it. Can u really provide for ur son right now? Can u make all the sacrifices that need to be done to take care of him? Think about it for a while, the awnswer just wont come in a day. If he is better off wit ur mom FOR NOW than let it be. Do wats best for ur son. Dont think about wat u want, think about wat ur son needs. Just take ur time and do wat u have to do to make sure u dont get back in a slump.