How do I get "the ring"???

Question

My bf and I have been together for 4 years..living together for 2...I am ready to move to the next step and have told him this..I am 35,divorced, have 3 kids(he has none and knows I cannot have anymore). I am a professional nurse..own my own home and am financially responsible. He is great with my kids.. I have heard many times from him that "we will get married someday"..I want an engagement ring..Want some kind of definate commitment from him..He was engaged before,and owned a house with his ex, but she cheated on him and they broke up(she got the house). I can understand him being afraid..but I have been loyal, loving and supportive of him..How can I get "the ring" that I want so bad?? He does not like to even talk about it..All I get is we will get married someday-someday I will get you a ring...I cannot wait forever..What should I do??

Answer 1

Don't obsess over it. I hate it when women are like this, it gives the rest of us a bad name. Just enjoy his company...I know that there are tax benefits once people get married, but just enjoy his company for the most part. If you keep asking and nagging him, he won't do it and it won't be as special. Give him time...he's a guy...he's probably got so many emotions about this topic, so just give it time. And if it never happens, that at least you've found a great man to be with who loves your kids. It's not the worst thing in the world if you don't get "the ring"--be thankful for him.

Answer 2

Ok, I’ve been in this same situation . Your boyfriend is like my ex boyfriend (comfortable in your relationship). The only way to wake up with a wayward guy is to leave. Ask your boyfriend one last time. But this ticks me off, because some men won’t even bring up the subject, women should not have to. But don’t take him seriously unless he commits to a date. As hurtful as this may sound, you need to move out and don’t talk to him unless he propose with a ring. No contact what so ever until he put a ring on your finger. When I left, I realized that my ex boyfriend did not intend to get married to me. However, leaving was the best thing I could have done for myself, although I wasted five years with him. At least I did not waste six. Good luck dear.

Answer 3

I find it odd that "she got the house" - Did she pay for it? As much as you may hate to hear it..there are always two sides of the story. I wish I knew that advice before I got involved, married and divorced. There is more going on there than he is just scared...

Answer 4

"been together for 4 years..living together for 2"

There's your first mistake - why should he bother to marry you, when he's got all the benefits of a wife without any of the legal entanglements?

Move out - tell him that since he doesn't want to make you his wife, you're not going to act like his wife, and he has to decide what he really wants.

Answer 5

4 years is way long enough to know if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone. You have to consider the ultimatum, BUT you risk losing him when you do. Otherwise, you may be waiting forever.

Answer 6

Ask him to marry you yourself. You're not some shy coy twenty-something. You're a woman who knows what she wants, so go and get it!

Propose to him. Either he'll say yes or he'll say no and give you a reason which will tell you exactly why he hasn't proposed to you yet.

Answer 7

so i assume he is living with you in YOUR house, correct? Darling, they won't buy the cow if they are getting steak for free! ! It is time for you to say to him . . . I am pulling the plug, Mister! Give him the choice to commit or move on. . . if you are ready for moving on to possibly be what is chosen. . . good luck. . .but he needs to see that you are serious about him committing to you.

Answer 8

But it yourself.

Answer 9

leave