How do you deal with emotionally abusive parents when you are an adult?

Answer 1

Don't live in the same house. Consider some physical distance from them. Go see a therapist about how to limit the abuse and how to respond to people who do this. You could possibly get in relationships with people who also do it (not intentionally) because it was all you knew. Learn new ways of talking to other people so you don't do what they did. And, if you can't confront them on their behavior and they learn to stop it (highly unlikely), limit your relationship with them. Good luck.

Answer 2

You did not mention whether you live with your parents or not. If you reside with them, begin to develop your own life. Separate yourself while in the home. If you reside at another location, it will be easier. You then have the option to be in their company at your choosing. Any way you slice it, becoming an adult with your parents is difficult. All of a sudden here is this man or woman who now has character, an opinion, a life and wants respect. What are parents thinking? This is what you might say if you have the opportunity to discuss your feelings.

Answer 3

As an adult you can choose to refuse to be abused, if you like. That could take whatever form is required to avoid the abusive behavior, walking away, hanging up, or simply not having contact. It's a personal choice and only you can decide.

Answer 4

i had the exact same situation but i was a young adult. i grew up that way. i hate my childhood and when i reached 19... i left. i should have done it earlier. i tried fixing it with them especially my mom but no success. i tried that when i was about 12 or 13. i tried 3x. when the third still failed, i gave up and totally clamed up. i just hated being home. so anyway, i gave up on the idea of having a good relationship with them. now i am happier than ever.
what i suggest u do before u actually leave, is talk to them. tell them exactly how u feel. tell them that you want a good relationship with them. if that doesnt work no matter how hard u try, then leave. nobody needs people who only brings grief and hurt. parents or not.

Answer 5

First you stop the inner voice that they gave you and get over your issues. Second, you stop taking the abuse and put them in their place when they are out of line. If that doesn't work, stop contact.

I've taken the first two steps with my father and he's not emotionally abusive towards me any longer. He will never change but he now knows what he can and cannot say to me.

Answer 6

State clearly that you will not tolerate being verbally abused and either leave the house or hang up the phone. You do not have to deal with their behavior if you are now an adult. Stand firm when they start their harassment and either it will stop them from continuing this behavior with you or you will stop speaking to them.

Answer 7

You don't...you're an ADULT. If they're emotionally abusive, then cut contact. You no longer have to deal with that.

Answer 8

the key is if you are an adult you have the power to not be around them and you can leave. Parents sometimes can be critical and nasty, you have to look past all that and move forward in life. You can just leave if you want.

Answer 9

Put distance between you. This includes conversation.

If you are in their presence, and they start the emotion abuse, then take an exit, and leave.

If you are on the phone with them, and they become emotionally abuse, end the conversation.

If they send you an email of emotional abuse ... return it to them .. and ask them to never send an email of that nature again .. tell them you won't read it.

Just don't allow the abuse to be in your presence.

Answer 10

You can't pick and choose your parents, unfortunately. There is no law stating that you must maintain a close relationship with family. Some people are just plain miserable, it's your decision as to whether or not you want to be exposed to it.