I am 30 yrs old. My ex-boyf broke up with me months ago. The break up was very hard for me. He broke up due to long-distance. I was very hurt about the break up as I really loved him and still do now. He has always called me back after the break up and we even met a couple of times. But he doesn't want to let go. About a month ago, he called me that he needs to see me. This was shortly after I told him that I am going travelling for a couple of months. He says he is too scared to loose me but he is not ready to come back to me. I was quite upset to see him leaving so I told him we must go separate ways and have no contact. He was upset but he said he has to accept it. But he called me last week saying he can't forget me and he thinks of me. But he then said he can't be with me now as I am going away to travel. He wants to meet when I come back from my travels. love him and he says he does too but I am so confused. I want to be with him but he says not now maybe later we can talk.
2007-12-07 11:17:31 · 13 answers · asked by violet b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Move on. You are better off without him.
2007-12-07 11:22:20 · answer #1 · answered by acedelux 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Go do your travelling. Enjoy every moment of it, because once you are married and have children you never seem to travel very far after that. Maybe this is God's way of letting you do something that you always wanted to do, and then when you come back the two of you will probably find each other again and settle down together. I know a young girl who did just that, she spent ten years travelling, and when she came back home her boyfriend was there waiting for her with open arms. They married and had a family and she had no regrets. Whereas if she had just got married at the beginning she would have resented her husband and her children forever, for missing out on the travelling that she had wanted to do.
2007-12-07 20:27:50 · answer #2 · answered by Alwyn C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you really ready to wait on the back burner until "he is ready." I know how you feel, I ended an almost 3 yr relationship (I am early thirties) last year because my guy was not "ready" either, although he never said that his actions proved otherwise.
I am still single but my self esteem is still intact.
He is really messing with you, think about it, if someone loves you would they treat you this way? It is a very depressing question to ask yourself but once you get honest you can get on with your life.
2007-12-07 19:24:27 · answer #3 · answered by kittykatsback 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think he sounds confused on what he "wants" with you. I mean he is the one who "broke up" with you, because of "long distance" relationships. It's not fair of him to request you to meet him whenever he calls or stops by. All that does is cause hurt and confusion with you because you just don't want to "meet up" with him when he stops by your place or calls. I don't blame you. It's not that "easy". I would suggest the next time he calls, or if he stops by, tell him you are not going to meet up with him and just be "friends" or "friends with benefits" or whatever it may be that he wants when he calls to meet up with you. Tell him it's hurtful to you, and the only way you want to see him, is if you will be in a relationship. Tell him if he doesn't want a relationship, and wants friends only, that you aren't rolling it out completely, but it's going to take time for you to get over being heart broken before you can just meet up and hang out, and be friends with him whenever he wants. I hope this helps.
2007-12-07 19:26:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey,
Wake up! You are 30. He is playing around like a teenager. He wants the best of both worlds. Play in his, then go out and play in yours. Don't be suprised if he has a friend just like you in another city.
2007-12-07 19:47:58 · answer #5 · answered by The Avenging Disco Godfather 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he wants you, he will want to be with you. He is not settled in his mind and could back out any time. If you want someone stable, who will say what they mean and stick up for it, continue on cutting off contact with him. He sounds insecure. You are not a favorite blanket he can just pick up and leave whenever his mood dictates it.
2007-12-07 19:22:20 · answer #6 · answered by Linni 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Allow me to translate this "guy" behavior for you.
This means things are not going so well on the dating scene for him, so you are his "plan B" girl. That is, until someone better comes along, he is going to be into you.
Don't fall for it! You are beautiful and worth so much more. Quit being this guys safety net and find a real man.
Good luck.
2007-12-07 19:22:51 · answer #7 · answered by box of rain 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
i would give him the deep six as i think he might be seeing some one near where he lives and i am sorry to hear the brak up hit you hard but i think you be better of with out him hope you get some one who loves you for woh you are soon take care
2007-12-08 15:40:45 · answer #8 · answered by j v 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a game player. Go on your travels and have fun as you sure do not seem to be having any with him.
2007-12-07 20:09:13 · answer #9 · answered by Lady Isis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
move on. don't waste your time on someone who can't make up his mind. he's playing games with you. he needs to work out his own issues of commitment before he can be in a serious relationship.
2007-12-07 19:24:15 · answer #10 · answered by jen19music 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋