my emotions and longing for intimacy r so strong i cannot help it we are both remaining abstinent sexually until after marriage but relieve ourselves by talking/fantasy..and cybering is that wrong???
2007-12-07 11:12:12 · 17 answers · asked by Reta 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Talking crap on the computer/fone aint releif. get together and when you do its called oral... as long as you wipe off your chin no one will know. lol lol
2007-12-07 11:42:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is absolutely nothing wrong with it, it's the perfect way to get to know his sexuality as well as your own. It will heighten your interest in each-other once you get married, reduce your first-time fears, expand your love life beyond the restrictied and inhibited and boring, and make you a happy person. It isn't just about guilty self-pleasure, or selfish release, it's a terrific way to give to your partner, and improve your imagination! Have fun, don't feel guilty about it, because it is the right thing to do. It won't harm your marriage, it can only help, so long as you stay grounded in reality - no growing wings or turning into fish, etc.
Merry Christmas!
2007-12-12 05:11:27 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are thinking that cybersex will satisfy you and allow you to hold off until marriage, I'm afraid it may only whet your appetite (or his) and make it harder to hold off until marriage. If a man lusts after a woman in his heart, he has already committed adultry with her, has he not? I would not judge you for doing so, but I would not encourage you either.
Perhaps the best thing to do would be to look into moving up the marriage? My wife and I had planned on getting married after college, but the sexual attraction was strong and we decided as hard as it was getting married and being in school, it would be harder still to resist our temptations. It is not a decision I would encourage for everyone - do some soul searching, and praying. God will answer your prayers and give you guidance.
2007-12-07 19:19:50 · answer #3 · answered by Damocles 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My recommendation, DON'T. Abstinence before marriage means that you don't get to learn a vital part of yourself. I used to think like you do, maintain chastity and purity before marriage, the end result is that part of your natural adult development is stunted. Years after you're married you may find that you're with a partner that you are sexually incompatible with because you didn't take the time to learn what turns you on.
Your emotions and urges are a natural part of being a human and to supress them is the abnormal part. If I had to guess, I'd say religion is involved?
2007-12-07 19:19:24 · answer #4 · answered by bogidu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it's wrong have a set date for marriage. It will probably help relieve some of the sexual tension between you as you get to know each other's sexual preferences before the big night. Otherwise, it will hurt you when the relationship ends.
2007-12-07 19:17:07 · answer #5 · answered by Thinkaboutit 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dearest Reta
I am a guy i know what you are going through. My soon to be wife have been holding out for over 6 months and it has pushed us to the brink of going insane. We only fooled around a few times and the sexual tensions been to much for us. We also starting cyphering a few weeks ago and doing the things you are doing. But we have gone further and shes been pretty graphic with her thoughts. No its not bad its very good for the both of you. Trust me my g. f and i can both tell you if you like .
Good Luck
2007-12-07 19:29:47 · answer #6 · answered by ho8er2 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hardly. It's sex at a very safe distance, but it's with someone you love, so what's the problem? It's no more wrong than sending sexy letters to each other.
2007-12-07 19:18:29 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not at all. You have to have a release somehow. When the time comes and you can consumate your marriage, it will make it that much more exciting. Congrats and good luck!
2007-12-07 19:18:44 · answer #8 · answered by Kathy R 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you want not to engage in sex until you are married, i guess you should also avoid having phone/cyber sex because that would somehow fire your desire to become physical with your boyfriend... lets just put it this way, if you are enjoying it over the phone or over the net, you'll probably become curious how it will be like in reality so the more you'll be drawn to temptation to try it... it's firing up and the sooner you'll realize, you might have been doing it in reality... just be careful...
2007-12-07 19:17:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
If it feels good do it I always say. After all humans are sensual creatures, we have five or maybe even 6 senses to enjoy, so if we dont enjoy them in the here and now, when will we enjoy them?
2007-12-07 19:16:39 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, its wrong. don't half baked it. you have to choose one and not do both. remember, saying no to sex is not necessarily saying no to intimacy. and not all intimacy should be sexual. get hold of your relationship and make it more deep. sexual relationships are the most shallow ones...........
2007-12-14 15:44:44 · answer #11 · answered by Ed II 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋