Given a choice of going out or spending time with your kids, what would you pick?

Question

I received an email from my boss today- about the fact that I am not attending our X-Mas party next weekend. He'd like me to reconsider. I am not. I love being with my kids- I am away enough from work and cannot recapture this time. So, I turned him down. He tried to play the "feel guilty" deal and I ignored it and moved on.

I love being with my kids. I don't care what the party is for; given a choice between leaving them with a sitter to go out or stay in- I'd rather stay home with them. At the very least, take them out someplace.

I am a teacher and other teachers find this strange.
Is it really or do other people feel the same way? I find it strange that it would seem strange to others. I realize I am using that word a lot, but it comes to mind.

Our baby is 15 months old- and outside of work (where my husband has her when I work and he works nights) we have left them for 3 hours for car shopping. We LIKE our kids. Our son is 11.

What are your feelings on this?

I am skipping it. I have no interest in hanging out after work. I miss my own kids too much--MUCH TOO MUCH.

I had asked if I could bring the baby- our son would not want to go- the answer was no- it is for adults only. Again, we work with kids. I would think "child friendly" would be a great idea. I have worked there for 9 years and have no interest in "keeping up appearances". So, after the response, I opted out.

Lolol...yeah, I see the balance- but I feel so happy after having spent all day with other people's kids to go to my own- being away to deal with their kids IS kind of a break in it's own way I suppose. It definately makes me grateful for what I have.

I didn't mean to make it sound unfair at all. If you want to go out, go out. I LIKE being with my kids- and my husband feels the same way. When asked at work today about why we will not be attending some felt it odd that we enjoy our kids so much. So, is it odd, or do you feel the same- that you really enjoy the time you get with your kids and have a lot of fun with them?

Answer 1

I would much rather stay home with my children, and I'm a SAHM! LOL I have left my children(2 1/2 years old, and 11 months old) just a few times. My oldest son was being left at daycare for 2 hours or so once a week, for 3 months while my husband was deployed, but that is only because that was my ONLY break from him. Since the birth of our youngest they have been left with sitters....let me think.....3 times. Once for my b-day, once for valentine's day, and once for a going away party(at a bar). I normally turn down invites if it means I have to leave my children somewhere. Sorry, but my children are a part of me, so if they aren't welcome, then I don't feel as though I am either.

Answer 2

I agree the Xmas party should of been child friendly. Last year when we went to my husbands Christmas Party I got a sitter and then when we got there there was some kids with their parents. I felt horrible I didn't take mine. But I'm a stay at home mom until I have to work nights which will be real soon but I do sometimes enjoy the peace. Because I'm a SAHM of 3 under 3. But when I was going to school i would miss them terribly and couldn't wait to get home. But see u work during the day and don't see your kids only at night and weekends and holidays so I could see your point. I would want to spend time with my kids if I was away alot.

Answer 3

Well I thought you meant that you were like a stay at home mom and you were wondering if you should go out once. I thought this because I had only read the topic question.
When it comes to the point where you hardly be with your kids-STAY! But if you were at home all the time and was talking about going out once with some friends or something, I would say go. It is the holiday time and you aren't with your kids 24/7. It was wrong of your boss to play the "feel guilty" deal when you have kids. I understand you on the child friendly part but then again, it wouldn't hurt to have an adult only party either. I see where you are coming from and I agree to stay home 1,000,000%. Just stay with your kids. It's best.

Glad I can help and God Bless : )

Answer 4

I am a stay at home mom and I love to get a break every now and then. If I was working I would probably be like you and want to stay home. I love my son there is no one in the world that makes me feel the way he does and I don't want to miss out on time with him. Being a stay at home mom I know I need to get out and be around others in order for me to be a good mom. If I don't get a break and I am tired it reflects poorly on him. I do hope you and your husband find ways to have quality time together without the kids. It's important for kids to see you have a strong relationship. I don't think it's strange that you have feelings like this it's your family and they are the most important people in our lives.

Answer 5

I think it sounds normal but I don't have any kids. If I was unable to see someone I loved for most of the day, everyday and I had an opportunity to spend time with all the people I work with and see everyday regardless I would pick the person I love in a heartbeat.

Answer 6

Well, I've read the articles in Baby Talk and such.. and they've said that when it comes to a work holiday party, they advise to go.. i guess it looks good for the employee.

In my case, as i also work full time, i would most likely attend... but not for long. I LOVE to spend time with my son. I HATE leaving him at home with his dad.. just to go to the grocery store!

But, i would just make an appearance... just to say you were there, then leave after about an hour.

Answer 7

Spend the time with time with your son!!! Camp appears like exciting, yet you will by no skill get that element lower back. Use the money which you will spend on camp to bypass exciting locations and purchase issues to do at domicile. detect a playgroup or community application to party with different mothers and teenagers so which you're socializing. maximum heavily-have a plan so which you do the flaws you want to do for the reason that element will fly by making use of so rapid. Run in the sprinkler, study books under a blanket on the hours of darkness, make forts, draw with chalk in the driveway, have a picnic and fly a kite, plant flora, make a scrapbook of all the property you do and magazine approximately it (he could make a e book), make cookies, blow bubbles, bypass on craigslist to verify if somebody has monarch caterpillars or a chrysalis or 2 to observe butterflies strengthen, museums, paintings initiatives, technology activities, count extensive form bugs, watch birds... I wish it grow to be summer season now. The final exciting element my teenagers and that i did grow to be have a "coastline party" interior with our swimming fits and coastline towels. it is 8 stages right here - the place is summer season??? have exciting, you will by no skill sense sorry approximately all the exciting cases you have mutually.

Answer 8

I recently had the same feelings. Are you not going because you would rather spend time with your children because if thats the case don't go? If you are not going because you are feling a little guilty, you shouldn't. You have to have a good balance in your life of being a mother, wife and just yourself. I don't agree with the balance tipping in either direction. I recently found tht I was smothering my family alittle and not having any alone time. I finally allowed myself to get out for a while and felt very refreshed. Who knows, you might have a really good time and your children will not be hurt by it, they know how much you love them!

Answer 9

I completely agree with you. We hardly ever get a babysitter unless we absolutely have to. (the only person that watches our kids is my mother and my father) When we do get a sitter the whole time we are asking each other "what do you think they are doing" "do you think we should go and pick them up?" It is healthy to go out every once in awhile with your spouse but I know how it is and we would much rather spend time as a family.

Answer 10

I'm with you--I'm a working mom and I hate to leave them if I don't have to. An occasional night out is OK, but I hate to leave them for more than just a couple hours when they are so little. We all know they're not little forever.

If he's so insistent, bring the kids along, haha, that will teach him.

If he tried to guilt trip you, tell him that you will only go if you can bring your toddler. In my last two companies, babes in arms and toddlers were welcome at company parties.