If a wife feels bad because her husband forgot an anerversary so she calls him and says, "Why does romance have to die after marriage"...how would you as a guy take this question? I asked it out of being disappointed and hurt, maybe I should have just not asked at all. Sometimes I feel men and woman have a hard time communicating. Please honest answers only.
2007-12-07 09:16:44 · 16 answers · asked by pictureshygirl 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
When you dated, you to the time to make her feel special and did things especially for her. Apparently, that's not happening now and she misses it.
In your defense, however, it is unrealistic of her to expect that the level of emotional excitement to continue after you've been married for a few years. That doesn't mean that romance has to die, it just means that reality steps in and takes a bigger bite out of your lives.
It would be important for you to demonstrate your love for her periodically. Make a point to do things that you know mean the most to her. Schedule a date night every couple of weeks and be romantic. Learn to speak to her in her love language. You are guaranteed to benefit from it if you do!
http://www.fivelovelanguages.com/30sec.html
2007-12-07 09:20:31 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
dear ,i have been reading all your questions. and i may be wrong but i have a feeling that there is a comunication gap between you two.
if you feel so strong about these occasions,dont try to check your husband whether he remembers or not,Instead, remind him at least a week before(even daily) that anniversary is coming and plan that day with him.He is your man and i am sure he loves you, then why put him into difficult situations only to strenghthen your believe that he is not putting his best effort in this relationship.You can even tell him what you want for a gift. In this way gradually he will learn that these things make you happy and will remember it next time.
Please read some good books on relationships and see where you are wrong,instead of where he is wrong.i read a very good book,"If love is a game these are the rules" try it.
if he is really very dumb, buy him a book on your wedding anniversary and then discuss different points with him.
best of luck
2007-12-08 01:34:22 · answer #2 · answered by jenny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is this: How would I as a guy take that question. Here are my (internal) reactions.
(a) I'm feeling sorry I forgot, but why does she have to take it so hard?
(b) Why are women so particular about birthdays and anniversaries and such? It's so irritating when you're bugged like this.
(c) For women, why does one thing lead to everything? Why's she saying "romance is dead"? I just forgot it once! What about the other romantic things?
(d) Gosh, I really shouldn't forget again - she really seems to have taken it badly. Right, so I'm not particular, but that doesn't mean I can forget - when I can see it *is* important for her.
(e) I'll make it up to her, and I sure hope she'll forget about this whole thing.
2007-12-07 23:27:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I bet a guy would take it as you feeling he didn't care. Which probably isn't the case, isn't it? He'd be hurt, but I think you are too.
I wouldn't have said that. I would have said something like "is everything OK?" asking what had made him forget. If he didn't have a pretty good answer, I would then tell him that this is important and I wish he could be more considerate of what's important to me.
No yelling. No crying. These things don't get you anywhere in a marriage.
2007-12-07 17:21:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its not that romance fades out after marriage, it fades out after you get engaged too. Right now I feel that there is no romance atall in between me and fiance maybe b'coz he lives elsewhere and me some where else...But I used to think distance grows love stronger...Its like each and every minutes I'm breaking down into pieces. What is making me go on is when I think of good times we shared that still keeps the love within me alive. Anyways...If your romance is dying then save your marriage. Often b'coz of our busy routine and running after money we forget the actually peace in our life which is to be with our close and dear ones, coz ultimately whatever happens, they are the ones who stand by us thick and thin. All the best!
2007-12-07 22:10:21 · answer #5 · answered by JB 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after marrege relations are maximum based on mutual understanding. because romance is the temparory thing.
rhere are very few peoples who can continue with their charm.
but its not difficult to get in that speed again.
when the matter is of forgetting some important day,it can be recoverd. there is some problem going to occur on that instance, and please mind that PEOPLE SPEAKS VERY WORST WORDS IN ANGER WHAT THEY NEVER WANT TO,SO DONT TAKE IT FINAL.
make the person think on what he or she said.
at last its the time to rectify ur mistake of being late for celebration....make any another day so unforgetable that u both will enjoy the same fun when u met eachother first time.
try some things , u may feel it fooliush,bt i eat lolypop as m a kid in front of all my people,and really it gives me feel of my early years. best regards for ur life...
2007-12-07 23:08:11 · answer #6 · answered by Ar.Ruturaj Kulkarni (councillor) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well she's disappointed in YOU! Not that there's no romance. A man should remember two things if nothing else. Her birthday and your aniversary. Now repeat after me. I will not forget those two things ever again. By her some flowers and a card. Maybe even diamond ear rings.
2007-12-07 17:23:15 · answer #7 · answered by Poppy 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Anniversaries are special and reaching the mildstone alone probably made you feel all gully on the inside! But never lose sight of what makes what you guys have to be special and that is love! Don't take it personal when men/woman don't remember! They have enough on the brain trying to stay focused on how it is that we are going to pay these bills! It'll work itself out!
Good Luck and God Bless!
2007-12-07 17:23:24 · answer #8 · answered by rita_hiemy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont think it dies i just think that now u r married and as a man there is a lot more pressure on you to provide and take of the wife, which is not fair bcz if the wife doesnt work she is not judged but if the husband doesnt work then its a big deal...so husband would forget our anniversary i would be a little upset but no big thing i know he has a lot on his mind...and to me romance is the little kisses i get b4 he leaves for work and the little i love u's......thats all u really need ....Good luck!
2007-12-07 17:23:41 · answer #9 · answered by Ginger86 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel that you approached the situation the wrong way. You should have waited, after work, and then confronted him. You should have started off by being straight forward and asked him, I can't believe that you for got our anniversary. I always believe that being straight forward and to the point is always the right way to handle a relationship dilemma.
2007-12-07 17:28:34 · answer #10 · answered by Cherri 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋