I have a good female friend, we're both married with kids and I'm attracted to her. I don't know for sure, but I think she's attracted to me. I don't want to screw up my marriage, I love my wife, but if something ever happens to her I've been wondering if I could have a chance with my friend - even if we're in our 70s. Am I crossing some wierd line if I want to make a deal with her that no matter how old we get if we are ever single at the same time, we try a relationship?
2007-12-07 08:12:20 · 12 answers · asked by Just a Guy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
yes, that's a problem especially if your spouse ever found out.
2007-12-07 08:16:34 · answer #1 · answered by CHARLES R 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because you are thinking about this did you know you are still thinking about cheating on your wife or even bad lucking you marriage and hoping it is not going to last love your wife like you say and continue to care for her and be with her. When the time comes for something to happen then you can make a decision til then just wait.
2007-12-07 08:24:32 · answer #2 · answered by Lost 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Making a deal to get laid befor you spouse is in the grave.
Sounds a bit disloyal and self centered and I'm sure you want to share the information with all involved parties right?
2007-12-07 08:36:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
it's not weird, i have friends who do this, they call it their "back up plans". the only thing that could make it weird is what are the two of you doing during your "wait". are you more or less having an affair, whether emotionally or physically? are you both continuing to give your spouses all that they rightfully deserve? not sure where the line would be exactly, but i'd be careful of what the two of you are doing while in your "waiting" period.
2007-12-07 08:22:32 · answer #4 · answered by celticbuddha 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Keep it in the vault for now. It could change your relationship and it wouldn't be good for your wife to know you actually said that to someone. It would make her feel like you were looking forward to something happening.
2007-12-07 08:19:21 · answer #5 · answered by ann 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, you're crossing some weird line here. You should be focusing all your energy toward your marriage not what might be. Are you planning on knocking off your wife?
2007-12-07 08:19:13 · answer #6 · answered by Poppy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you never know what could happen. either way she is in your life for a reason and i commend you for not wanting to screw up your marriage. just keep those feelings tucked away until they are ready to come out.
i think everyone has one of those deals. i have one with a close male friend that i trust with my life.
2007-12-07 08:16:49 · answer #7 · answered by Matilda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why would you be thinking about not wanting to be with your wife in the future? the reason u married her is to be with her the rest of your life. If you knew u weren't ready for that then let her go.
2007-12-07 08:20:40 · answer #8 · answered by Liz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, my best guy friend mike and i do...we never got pass the second date...but been best buds since '93...i'm single now, he is married...but we made a pact that if we both end up single in our 80-90's we'll then hook up...you know, to have that person in the rocker next to you type thing....
2007-12-07 08:20:00 · answer #9 · answered by la21unica 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop living in the world of make believe.
The fact is that you have a family. Focus on making that better.
2007-12-07 08:18:55 · answer #10 · answered by Vitiran 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
um... well ....idk but yes thats kinda wierd
i would say divorce your wife, tell her to divorce her husband, and you two get married. if you are willing to wait your whole lifetime for her then you obviously love her and vice versa. dont waste your whole life on someone you dont truly love when you could have the chance to spend the best years together with that one special person.
2007-12-07 08:17:34 · answer #11 · answered by BRASiL 01 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋