What is your primary identity?

Question

All people are many things. I am a daughter, wife and mother. I am a woman, a Democrat, an optician. I am white, I am originally a New Yorker, but now a Montanan. I have Unitarian beliefs, but am not a Christian or a churchgoer. I am a dog person, I am straight.

I know people who primarily identify themselves by sex; I do-my first identity to me is 'woman'. Many women think of themselves as "mother", and I know a few men whose jobs give them their identity. How do you identify yourself? When you think of all of the things you are, what comes to mind first?

Perhaps I didn't make myself clear; what I'd like to know isn't how you identify yourself to others; what I'd like to know is how you think of yourself, in your own mind.

Answer 1

A woman that became a daughter. a wife.. a mother.. an aunt.. a grandma.. In the path of life, while maintainng these titles, people forgot that I am also a woman...

Answer 2

Im a Lutmer (my maiden last name)
Im a woman
Im a wife
Im an advocate
I am intelligent


Ive never identified myself the way lots of people I know do-by my race (white), state (Texan). I used to identify myself pretty highly by being Catholic; I still am, but its less a part of my identity now because my faith is less. Im also a survivor of rape and assault, but for me, thats never been a part of my identity-I actually think because I havent done enough healing rather than the alternative.

When I say I am an advocate, that is both my job and my passion. To be honest, I never identified myself by my marital/relationship status-even when I was engaged - until I was married, which was less than two months ago (I honestly dont know if it will be so high up on the list as I get more used to it).

This question attracted me because Ive had to answer this publicly before, and being a Lutmer has always been of the utmost to me-its always been my primary mode of identifying myself. Its why I hyphenated my name rather than simply replacing it-I just couldnt. Unfortunately, many people couldnt understand that (here in East Texas).

Answer 3

1. Strong Intelligent Haitian woman
2. Student
3. Shy

Answer 4

Jason Bourne

Answer 5

Beth

When someone asks me who I am that's all I have to say. My identity usually goes by who I am talking to. No reason to identify myself to my boss as a single women.

As far as the things I am most in those types of groups, probably drafter.

Answer 6

I guess my first identity is being a human being. Secondly, I'm a guy. Bust most of the time I think of myself as a librarian. I hope I am an ace librarian.

Answer 7

Multiple -

I am part of a D.I.Dmultiplicity

-sort of defies definition.
But that is the overall primary definition

Answer 8

1) strong, Russian woman
2) liberal
3) engaged, family oriented
4) left brained

Answer 9

My first is probably woman. My second would be student.

Answer 10

Gadfly, irritant.