I am 9 weeks and me and my boyfriend is so against me having this baby.He wants me to abort now and plan later

Question

We both have good jobs making over 6 figures combined and I understand everyone wants to be prepared for a child but it's here now. He is very firm on how he feels. He wants us to plan and prepare for a child. But it's kinda hard when it's here and a reality now. He tells me if i go through with it he is gone.

Answer 1

How about this idea: Abort the boyfriend! Keep the baby. The baby shouldn't be punished for what has happened. Your boyfriend could have kept his pants on if he wasn't ready for a baby. You can raise a baby alone. Many women do it successfully. Your b/f only wants you to get an abortion because he is selfish, and is afraid to pay child support when he leaves you.
Also, you should read this, and show it to your b/f:
http://www.babycentre.co.uk/pregnancy/fetaldevelopment/09weeks/
Good luck!

Answer 2

I'd tell him to hit the door. Sounds like you can support this baby on your own! Don't let him talk you into a big mistake. If you have an abortion I promise you will regret it. If you have the baby, you'll never regret it. We have 2 kids together and he has a son from a previous marriage and we are 17 weeks pregnant. Our 2 kids are 12 months apart. When I found out I was pregnant with my 2nd I was terrified. I wondered how it would affect all of us and how I would deal with having 2 babies and a 3 yr old step son. But, I wouldn't have it any other way now. Even during the hard time (And trust me there were some) I never regretted having my son. I can't imagine life without him.

Answer 3

The choice is really up to you, not him. It's your body, your life. Just based off of what you've said about him, I would have serious concerns about keeping him in your life period. He sounds like a candidate for future child abuse. He is a "runner" and if you continue with the pregnancy, just know that you won't be able to count on him for any help whatsoever. I guess you'll have to do some serious soul-searching and figure out whether or not you're ready to do this on your own. And although you both contributed to the pregnancy, if he was adamant about not having an unplanned pregnancy, he should have enforced using some sort of protection. So, he cannot put all the blame on you. Like you said, it's here and it's a reality. If you decide to continue with the pregnancy, let him know you will help him pack his stuff and that he can easily be replaced. You will be able to find someone who's willing to be there for both you AND your child. There is no reason the child should have to suffer because of a mistake HE made....just my opinion.

Answer 4

Have you ever heard the phrase "Your body, Your choice"? You have several options
1. you can do what he wants and face the possibility of regret later
2. Carry baby to term and give up for adoption
3. Have and raise baby alone or with the help of the father. If he is a good one he will except you decision and do the right thing. if he does leave that will not get him out of paying support for the child. That is the "You play, You pay" clause of child support.

What your boyfriend doesn't understand that no matter how much you plan for a child there are always things that can happen.

Answer 5

Okay, first any man that would threaten a child's life is not deserving of being a father. And yes that is what abortion does. As I'm sure you have guessed I am strictly against abortion. I got preg with my 1st when I was 18. I had no job and was not married. I have since gotten married to the baby's father and we have been together for 15 years. I have a friend who got preg when she was 15 and she regrets that abortion till this day. That baby deserves a chance at life and you deserve to be a mom with a child that will love you forever. Tell that man? of your's that this is your baby in your body and if he didin't want kids he shouldn't have been having sex yet. Raise that baby. I was raised by a single father and wouldn't have had it any other way. I love my dad so much for taking care of me all those years. I love my mom too. She finally grew up and she is great mom now. Welcome to motherhood. There is nothing in this world like holding that baby in your arms. And if you don't want it there are thousands of people out there who would love the chance to hold that warm little bundle in their arms.

Answer 6

See YA!!!!!! I wouldn't be with a man who made me choose between my child (or child to be) and him. My guy was dead set against having children, doctors told me I couldn't, I got knocked up. I wasn't going to tell him, simply because I knew where he stood on the issue, but my mom said he deserved to know and he could make up his own mind. At first it never occurred to him that I wouldn't abort, that I was prepared to raise a child on my own. You don't try for 14 years, through two marriages and 2 years of fertility treatments to get PG, be unsuccessful, then when you do by someone who doesn't want kids, you abort. OH HELL NO. I was straight up, if you are in-you are in, if you aren't, then see ya....don't come back. He chose to stick around. We still live separately and I do most of the child rearing and he pays up and buys necessities. Though I would like for them to have more of a relationship, I just keep hoping that he'll be more playful with her as she gets older. And some people just aren't good with babies. I look into my baby's eyes and couldn't imagine ever aborting her. I don't think he could either, especially since she looks just like him.

Answer 7

You are so much better off without him. This was exactly the same situation for me and my ex. He wanted me to get rid. He said he wanted to stay with me but this wasn't the right time and he wanted it in 2 years. I said to him what is the difference between this child and the one in 2 years?

And that is the question you have to ask him. What exactly is the difference?

Ok my situation turned out badly and He left me anyway as I never let him watch enough football. I don't need a man like that in my life. I'm earning no where near to 6 figures.

but just think this to yourself. Could you live with yourself if you got rid of it and then he dumped you anyway? You would have lost both things.

Good luck with whatever you choose.

Answer 8

In my opinion u should not stay with this guy. It shows how little he cares about u and loves you. My husband and I dont make that much money, we are both still young but we never thought about abortion. Someone can always say they are ready to have a baby but I dont think you are never ready for a new life. Have ur baby u dont need a guy like that u can take care the baby on your own. Dont ask for his help either show him that you dont need him and that ur better off without him. Good luck you will make it. Plus is not the baby's fault so dont hurt him just to please a guy.

Answer 9

Only you can decide if that is what you really want. But think about that little life inside of you. He or she could be the person to discover a cure for the common cold or a cure for AIDS. Who are we to decide that someone who hasn't gotten a chance at life shouldn't even get to try? If you really don't wan the baby, think about adopting it out to someone who does. There are plenty of people in this world who want a baby and cannot have one. But in case you change your mind hold off the final papers until you have met your baby. You may find that he or she is an answer to a prayer.

Answer 10

this choice is up to you. but know that you are never prepared for the right to time to have a child. you will always feel you dont have enough money, time or you are too much envoled with your job.

but you have to be true to what you believe. do you belive in abortion? do you think you can handle a child alone? alot of people do, so dont think it is impossible. it sounds like your bf is being selfish. he isnt thinking about you or what you want. if that is it, then he shouldnt have a say. either way, it is your choice in the end. but there is never a perfect time to have a child.