what should I do?
2007-12-07 02:41:52 · 11 answers · asked by Mich 4 in Travel ➔ Germany ➔ Other - Germany
Bring flowers - anything except red roses - and in the south of Germany don't bring yellow chrysanthemums (death flower) - and a nice little gift from America (most Germans are really fond of cowboy/western things). If you don't speak German, I would suggest learning a few polite phrases and as much German as you can. If your local community education has a crash course in German go for it. You don't have to be fluent. Even though most Germans speak English as well as you, they will expect you to make the effort. They will appreciate it, and then switch to English.
Be sure and use the formal Sie/Ihnen form of address at first and wait for your future in-laws to switch to du/dich form. Then you can switch to informal address.
Don't be effusively forward. Be polite, dignified, and reserved, but not unfriendly. Wait for them to open up to you. If they are a bit stand-offish at first, it doesn't mean they don't like you - it's just the German way.
At least for the first meeting dress nicely and conservatively - sunday best. Meeting the in-laws is a bit ritualistic in most German families. There is a strong sense of duty, loyalty, and family honor among Germans. That loyalty goes both ways: they will be fiercely loyal to you after they've gotten to know you. Germans are slow to warm up, but they are the most loving people after they do.
2007-12-07 10:02:28 · answer #1 · answered by Robin Runesinger 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Do you speak any German yet? IF not then I would suggest learning a few words and phrases so when you meet them you can say hello in their language.
They always appreciate it when you try to speak their language and do not just auto speak english though many do speak English. It will make a good impression.
Where in Germany? Id learn to say things like, Hello its great to meet you and I hope my stay will not be a problem or something for example.
Other than that maybe bring them a gift from your city or state that is UNIQUE to where you live and give that to them and explain what it is. That will also go over well. Many Germans love to drink wine so you could always buy a bottle of Wine from your region as well to share with them all as a toast maybe.
The cultural differences can be great but I love the country and going there yearly and lived there before. I am sure you will do just fine. Remember they are not as prudish as Americans are and that is important to remember.
Have fun or Viel Spass!
2007-12-07 05:37:18 · answer #2 · answered by Legend Gates Shotokan Karate 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with all that Denise has to say. Also, they are likely to have coffee and cake set out on the table, unless you are meeting them at a mealtime.
Also, remember that next month is also the New Year, so wish them a Frohes Neues Jahr - "frawers noyers yaher" (yah like in Yahoo)
When I met my in-laws for the first time, I had only my school german and they knew NO english. I arrived at supper time, so the bread and cold meats were served in the lounge in honour of me, I supppose.
One can´t go wrong with a smile every now and again, and a Danke when offered or given something. Germans love getting cut flowers from visitors.
2007-12-07 22:55:16 · answer #3 · answered by koeknbiltong 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get the book The German Way about German culture. I read this book before I moved to Berlin and it helped a lot.
The Germans are VERY formal in comparison to Americans. You want to be sure not to offend them accidentally.
I highly, highly recommend finding out about traditions and what is and isn't acceptable.
Some things to think about:
When invited to someone's house for dinner, always always bring something (like flowers)
Always ask if you should take off your shoes when you arrive
Always help to clean up after dinner
Always say hello to everyone in the room when you arrive (even if you don't speak the language)
Good luck!
2007-12-07 08:54:38 · answer #4 · answered by DeeGee 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think your future husband will show you what to do. Bring flowers! And as to the rest, you'll notice that Germans don't worry much about any "social code"; just be yourself. They'll be well aware that you're a foreigner in a strange country and will help you any way they can; and if you're lucky, they speak some English. There's nothing to fear, but a lot to enjoy.
2007-12-07 05:28:56 · answer #5 · answered by Lucius T Fowler 7 · 4⤊ 1⤋
get to know something about their town. Greet them with a handshake, Germans are not hugging people, respect them and be nice, germans are straight forward so do not take everything so offensive. whaen you talk, speak clear not like the normal americans do, they talk like they are chewing on gum while talking. They are as nervous about you as you are about them, but it should be allright. Go and have fun and enjoy the country, i need to go back soon too
2007-12-07 07:35:28 · answer #6 · answered by Randy W 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i dont know either what you mean exactly but to the guy above me:
saying du to someone unknown or someone with authority is not polite
you would say : Guten Tag.Wie geht es ihnen?
always use the respect form of you ( Sie) until you are invited to say the informal ´´du´´
and be on time
if u wont be on time you have a big minus point
2007-12-07 03:03:34 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋
Be friendly, be polite, be yourself. Hopefully you know enough german to be able to speak a little with them.
2007-12-07 02:49:43 · answer #8 · answered by Ralfcoder 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
What´s the question???
2007-12-08 01:15:25 · answer #9 · answered by Hanoi_babe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
umm....say hello??
not sure what you are asking....
2007-12-07 02:47:35 · answer #10 · answered by sixxtwo42 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋