For Married women only, no men need answer.?

Question

Y do women love haveing sex before they r married but after it goes down to 1 or 2 times a month? My wife and I have been married for 11 yrs and together for 16, I am very open minded and love to please her but whenever i try to start up with foreplay she is not in the mood, but she will turn around a couple of days later ask me y does she have to always get things started. She doesn't I just get tired of being told she isnt in the mood.

Answer 1

Well, when you have been married for a while sex comes down to crawling in bed, getting it on and going to sleep. We all know its true. We lead busy lives and all we do is rush, rush, rush. Sometimes we need to slow down and look at the situation. Is your wife under some pressure at work? Sit down and talk to her. Ask her what her ideal situation for making love would be then try to make it come true. If she wants to make love on an island, then turn the bedroom into an island. She will appreciate all of your efforts. Once you open the lines off communication then maybe you can tell her your fantasy and you guys can make each others fantasies come alive. And also you are married to her, sex shouldn't be the term, you should want to make love to your wife.
Good Luck.
If this doesn't help, then seek professional help.

Answer 2

I find that before things weren't that busy and now that your married and probably have kids and alot more other things going on everyone is so tired. Ifind that in my marriage i get it less now than i ever did when we first meet. When we met it was like every day nonstop. Yea things change after awhile which makes the sex suck. I am always willing to spice it back up takes two to tango and if the other is not then it's not going to work. I say make time for it. Don't plan it because that never works. Set the mood again by goign out to dinner have a drink and take it from there. That always works.

Answer 3

I hear that a lot and don't think that's the case. I'm not knocking men, because the same can be said for women, but all the effort that someone puts into a relationship and having sex can diminish when you get the person and its 2, 4, or 10 years down the road. It takes a lot of work to keep that same level of care and concern you have with your mate that you had when you first met because you know the person, you see them everyday--the "newness" is gone. On the other hand, me always adding an unpopular opinion, I think its a spouse's job to satisfy that aspect of a relationship. You cannot ask someone to be with you until death and then expect them to be happy with very little attention. Every need by both parties may not always bet met, but the other should always be doing their best to try.

Answer 4

The same thing happened to me, not because I wasn't in the mood but menopause will do that to you( your mind wants to, but your body doesn't) anyway my husband stopped asking and after some thought I realized if the situation were reversed I would react the same way. It's hard because feeling can easily be hurt over something like this, so just keep the communication open and honest with your partner knowing you are coming from a place of support and love.

Answer 5

have you had kids in these 11 years? thats a major issue. some women never get their libido back. some women lose something after they push an 8 lb kid thru that tiny hole. and ur dealing with body image issues too, after u have kids. u dont feel as sexy. i suggest u try and try again. i tell my man im not in the mood but he keeps trying. lol eventually he gets the prize. tell her how good she looks. when u get home let her take the night off from the housework and the kids. let her take a nap. give a massage. i bet by the time the housework is done and the kids are in bed she will be rested and ready!

Answer 6

I have been married for 9 years, and except during "that time", rarely does more than 48 hours go by without having sex.

Usual for me is 5-10 times a week. Sorry your wife doesn't - I think a lot of people get caught up in the drudgery of life and forget what and who is important.

EDIT cooter women who cannot keep sex on their mind for their husbands eventually lose them, either in reality or in their minds. REAL men have those other concerns on their minds too.....

Answer 7

First, congradulations on your long marriage. Try not to take what she's saying personally. You're probably starting things up at the wrong moment; when her mind is on other things, or she's busy doing something else. Then when she's in the mood, you're probably busy too and can't pick up easily on her signals. So, just keep on ravishing her when she wants it and enjoy.

Answer 8

Why don't men GET IT? Men have 2 things on their mind, work and sex. Women however have, kids, laundry, bills, grocery shopping, cleaning the house, feed the family, clean up the mess, on and on and on. Are you seeing the picture here? No wonder were either to tired or just are NOT in the mood.

Answer 9

In both of my long term relationships, I got tired of doing all the household chores, child rearing, working full time and attending college. Just too wiped out. Also got tired of being mommy with benefits to husband.

If you are ignored all the time, sports, tv, friends etc. am I just supposed to be thrilled when he wants some. Can't be bothered with me all day and evening but I'm supposed to be waiting in bed spread eagle just waiting for it? Oooh come on baby give it to me? Pleassssse!

Answer 10

i'm a woman who keeps it real. and i been single and married, i know that ppl work and get tired but marriage is a job and women need to understan that if u don't please ur man someone else will. if u dont take care of home another woman would love to. theres an old song that says 'the same thang u did to get yo baby, its gonna take the same thing to keep her/him'. that is so true.like i said i been married and he cheated and i been single and messed with a married man. so i know both ends. i cooked for him, gave him attn, and listened to him. at home he was just gettin arguments. it was wrong and i dont condone it but at least im honest. tell her she should be lucky that ur even interested in foreplay. some men like to skip all that. women betta wake up and not take their men for granted i wish i could scream that to all these heffas!!!