why do pple want to be in an abusive relationship?

Question

/ disrespectfull. and after they break up why do they wanna go back to their relationship and cry over it

Answer 1

Belive me I know this one. People do not want to be in abusive relationships. They don't go into the relationship saying hey here is an abusive one i think il enter it.
it just happens once they get to know the person over time. What happens is they have fallen in love with the person. They stay because they hope and truly think that the person will change. They see many good qualities inthe person and wants so badly for things to work out they stay in hopes for good things to come such as change, or they think the person will realize what they are doing..its all about hope..

But then the question arises and they ask themselves or should ask themselves..how much do i love myself? I cant love myself that much if I allow this behavior. Some people don't love themselves or respect themselves enough so they allow others to disrespect them also. If this makes sense to you.
There comes a time when they leave when they have left the other person has realized how much they love them and are sorry they abused them, so the other person falls for this only to get all the hope up once again and it starts all over.

so you see, it is hope for change that they stay. It is love for ther person that makes them stay and the fact that they think they are the ones that can help them.

such an awful cycle it is.

Answer 2

People don't WANT to be in an abusive relationship. Shame on you for asking it that way. I came from an abusive relationship, so I know what I'm talking about. Abusive people are not necessarily ******* all the time. They have their good side too. People don't LOOK for an abusive partner. They usually fall in love with the person's good side and then discover their abusive traits later on in the relationship. People don't want to admit that the person they love is not very nice at times and yes, it is hard to leave for good. I did leave for good, but there have been times when I've thought about going back because he was not all bad. He's sweet and funny when he's not angry. The fact remains that he is NOT nice when he's angry, and so I have left for good. Other people believe that the person will change and are unable to do the same.

I think the question is pretty ignorant. Until you've walked a mile in someone else's shoes, back off.

Answer 3

Hi, I doubt anyone wants to be in an abusive relationship. However, there are people who get stuck in one and then find a hard time leaving it. Its something they got used to and they don't realize that life can get better if they leave it and get out. They might be afraid that the abusive spouse will get angry at them for trying to leave and cause more harm. They see a protection in the relationship they have now, its something their used to. They might get back into that relationship out of a belief that the other person really loves them and will try to overcome their abusive quality. However, many times it doesn't work and the abuser just continues being abusive so then they cry all over again because they could possibly love this person anyhow and they just want them to be good to them. In the beginning they might have gotten into this relationship because they liked a controlling person and they didn't pick up on the signs of his controlling as a negative thing, as a potential abusive spouse.

Answer 4

An abusive relationship destroys your self esteem. After awhile you truly believe you are unattractive and worthless. You believe you are lucky the abuser wants you because nobody else ever will. You tolerate the abuse because you're afraid of being lonely. Or worse, the abuser has threatened you and you're scared for your safety if you leave.

So you don't WANT to be in the abusive relationship, you just don't have enough self confidence to leave. You really don't WANT to go back either, you just feel like nobody will ever want you. You're confused and not thinking right.

It's easy to say you'd never allow a man to abuse you, but it's really hard when you love a guy and he treats you so badly. You wonder what's wrong with you that would make him treat you that way. You just don't fully understand until you've been through it.

Answer 5

No one want to be in an abusive relationship. But you have given your heart to someone. It's important to remember that these women have given their hearts to these men. The abuse isn't always constant. After the fall out, it's the honeymoon all over again. It can be very confusing because there is always that hope that maybe they have finally changed.

So I guess the reason they go back is because they have faith that the relationship will work. They don't want to go back to an abusive relationship.

Answer 6

people don't just walk into an abusive relationship. They usually find out when they're IN the relationship already. They cry over it because they were hoping for things to get better. Those who want to go back have security issues and co-dependencies issues as well. Don't be too judgmental of people who are in bad relationships. We don't go around hitting our heads on walls intentionally.

Answer 7

Because they have EXTREMELY low self esteem. As others on here have said, they think they can change the abuser and that's not going to happen. Move on. My advice to people is have pride in yourself, if you are a good person you will find someone who treats you with respect. A lot of people have no confidence in themselves.
Never put up with that kind of crap!

Answer 8

I dont believe that anyone really wants to remain in an abusive relationship. It may start out as disbelief, followed by fear.

Answer 9

They somewhat are. If a white boyfriend caught his lady pal cheating with yet another, in many circumstances he will interfere yet in an assertive away. in comparison with a black boyfriend, he will easily attack the guy. AAs whinge too plenty.

Answer 10

could be a variety of reasons; drama queening, needing to recreate their upbringing, self centered bs to gain sympathy/attention, low esteem, foolish decisions, no concern for themselves or others, radical self hatred, seeking the challenge--wishing to create the guy they desire, etc.

Ugh, I have learned the hard way to tune them out completely, like they don't exist. They are not interested in changing or improving, only suffering and causing massive suffering for all who love them. They are walking train wrecks, to be avoided at all costs.