I have been divorced for 61/2 years, have joint custody w/ my ex of my 11 year old, w/ me holding the primary residence for my son, my ex owes over 20K in child support and medical support and an enforcement hearing is scheduled next month by the Attorney Generals office, but he is now taking me to court next week to request for my son goes to live with him. He has been pressuring my son to say that he wants to go live w/ him, but though my son loves him a lot he wants to live w/ me and see him as much as he can. His dad has been good to him, but has never been involved in his school or extra curricular activities, couldn't tell you his teacher, doctor, friends names etc.... Does he have a chance to take him if he can persuade my son to say that he wants to go? He has requested a social study, which I beleive will be in my favor, my only fear is that he can get my son to say that he wants to go with him. Please advise.
2007-12-06 16:42:54 · 10 answers · asked by ad 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Highly unlikely this will work in his favor, very important that the court next week know of his child support issue. Good to him by not paying his child support.....re-think that one, no? What he is trying is not easy at all, they will also know if he has been pressuring. Start applying the pressure to his a&& by agressively persuing the 20K, seek cost of living increases, along with activity payments such as camp, sports and other things to help make and keep your son maintain a well rounded childhood. Got it.
2007-12-06 17:00:19 · answer #1 · answered by zurc137 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How is he gonna pay for that child to live with him if he can't even pay 20k in back support? That guy is a joke. I would argue That he doesn't have the financial means to take care of him full time.
There's a chance they may not listen to your 11 year old's wishes in court. Usually they wait until the child turns 13 before they will listen to the child's wishes. They have made exceptions, however.
My best guess is that your ex does not want to pay/owe support anymore and is probably requesting this change so YOU will have to pay support instead.
2015-11-09 06:04:38 · answer #2 · answered by <3 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a judge may ask an 11 what he thinks, i suggest this be done in private in the judges chambers without either parent present and u also might want to ask the court to appoint a GAL- guardian ad lidum- essentially an attorney for the child, it does not bode well for your ex if he doesn't keep up his child support start with so how can he take care of a child and all of the other things you mentioned, but the judge will go more on what your husbands actions have been in the past, and the social study, which sounds in your favor, and what the gal thinks is in the best interest of the child, i would imagine it will be pretty plain that he only wants custody so he can get a break on the support, if he truly wanted to be involved with his child he would know all the things you mentioned and be up to date with support, after that in itself shows how much a priority his child has been if he can't bother to pay support, mine finally got that far behind and he ended up getting a felony for non support so keep after them to prosecute him and don't forget to mention the other hearing to the judge that is going to be hearing the custody case, as sometimes one court dosen't know what the other is doing and let the gal, and the judge know that he has been pressuring your son, also the social worker they will all probably talk to your son about these things, and it is really a rotten thing your ex is doing just to try and get out of paying child support mine ended up getting jail time and 5 years of probation for felony non support [and tell your ex to put that in his pipe and smoke it] just kidding dont talk to him except about your son or he will be a jerk
2007-12-06 16:57:06 · answer #3 · answered by Dale T 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
While don't know what the courts will rule it could go either way yes he could hit you up in court in a different way. During the time you were married you share in debt and earnings, the child support he owes can also be seen as half of it being yours only during the time you were married. The likelyhood of a judge granting that though is slim and he'd have to have a fairly good explanation. Far as spousal support that is also possible depending how long you were married, if it can eb shown while you were also married you gained a much higher income also. You could be set with spousal support. However spousal support is generally meant for when 1 is basically rich and/or married for a long time. The idea behind it is that without the support of your spouse emotionally you might not have achieved your riches so they get their cut. Still sadly courts rarely rule against women in such situations as its very biased in womens favor.
2016-05-21 23:18:46 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Request that your son talks to the judge alone with the attorneys. He will not be afraid to tell the truth without his parents. When a child is being pressured and he has to sit there in front of that parent and say it, usually they will say what they are told. Even if the child goes to live with him the child support is owed. Past due amounts do not just disappear. He is still responsible for it. I would not think that the judge would send him to live with his dad. His dad cannot even pay his support, how is he to be trusted with the welfare of the child. Good luck with this, I am rooting for you.
2007-12-06 16:59:17 · answer #5 · answered by kim h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what state you're in, but here in Wisconsin, they need a compelling reason to move a child from one home to another. Abuse, neglect, etc. would have to be present in your home for your son to be moved to his father's home. They don't go by what the child says, they do not want the child be put in the position of making these decisions, and being put in the middle of a tug of war. A change would have to be approved by all three of you, at least in this state. The courts here are very hesitant to change a child's living situation if it's stable, because they want the child to have that constancy in their lives. So if he started out with you, and everything is fine, then he will stay with you. You might want to get a free consultation with a lawyer in your state to get some general information, or maybe your court itself has a mediation division that can explain the rules concerning this issue in your state.
2007-12-06 16:59:27 · answer #6 · answered by ViSaja 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
So what if your son REALLY does want to live with his father? Don't you want what will be best for your son or are you so hell bent at keeping that child support that you don't want your son to be happy? How much time his father has spent in his life up til now is moot, he has every right to petition the court for residential custody. I have a hunch that he THINKS he won't have to pay back the back child support owed...which is wrong. He will STILL owe that money and will STILL have to pay it back...but if your son chooses to live with his father I say let him go. He has the right to find out that the grass isn't always greener in someone else's yard.
2007-12-06 19:55:07 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Sounds to me like your ex is trying to dance around the back-owed child support. Talk to your child in a matter of fact way and let him know how much you love him and want him to live with you and I don't think you have a thing to worry about.
2007-12-06 16:50:54 · answer #8 · answered by sandy t 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, the courts will not allow an 11 yo to make a decision like that.
2007-12-06 16:59:54 · answer #9 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a good lawyer to make him pay up FIRST before anything else is filed.
2007-12-06 17:14:37 · answer #10 · answered by Equinox 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋