Is it possible to have a healthy, trusting relationship with a husband/wife without having sex in your marriage?
I'm 24 yo and someday I'd like to be married, but I have many insecurities about my body (heavy, cellulite, excessive hair). I'm very embarassed by my body and don't think intimacy is possible for me. I've been called terrible names (ie. hairy beast) and have gotten funny looks and hurtful comments (you're a bad kisser) in the past.
2007-12-06 16:05:17 · 20 answers · asked by sneakyme_69 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Awww, "irrelevantjoker", that was so sweet! I feel for you. I've been called Sasquache (I don't know if that's how you spell it). When you meet the right person all that stuff doesn't really matter to them. I am hairy too. I didn't wear short sleeves 'till after high school! I also have side burns, so I never used to wear pony tails either. When I started college I had so much anger in me and just disdain for the way I thought I should look and I made it a point to wear short sleeves and pony tails! I said, "F--- it!" If somebody wants to be with me they're going to have to love me the way I am! I am sorry people made fun of you and said hurtful things, but you can overcome that! You can exercise to lose extra weight and cellulite. There are also creams and stuff that kind of help with that. As for the extra hair there's always waxing, or laser hair removal. Now, you shouldn't do these things to make someone else happy, but you can do them to make yourself feel good and more confident. It's really an investment. An investment to boost your confidence and self image. When you find the right person you'll want to share yourself in that way, with being intimate. By the way, I found that one person who loves me the way I am and we've been mostly happily married for 13 years now. Lots of sex!
2007-12-06 16:27:30 · answer #1 · answered by im sure 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no reason to be insecure. Don't let what other people say get you down. You can do things to help you feel better about yourself. They would have to change their whole attitude to be a better person.
Excessive hair can be removed, if you feel uncomfortable about it. Heavy people find love all of the time. Cellulite is something that plenty of people have.
You have just not met the right person yet. Don't worry, it will happen, if you hold your head up high and act confident!!! Also, you could develop a sense of humor. People love others with a sense of humor. Try not taking life so seriously.
As far as the kissing goes, practice kissing your mirror. Never allow too much saliva to leave your mouth, only enough to moisten. Let your mind feel sensual and think sexy thoughts when kissing.
2007-12-06 16:21:05 · answer #2 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
While it is possible to have a healthy relationship without sex, most people would miss it.
But what is more important is that you have self esteem issues. Keep in mind that the right person can make you feel sexy no matter how you feel you look and love can really make things seem different.
If you want a healthy relationship, first work on loving yourself and then on finding someone to love you too. Because you won't show the parts of you that are "love worthy" until you love them and know what they are.
2007-12-06 16:14:54 · answer #3 · answered by mj69catz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's possible. Looks don't matter when you find the right person. And sex is not everything in a marriage. You need love, trust and respect too.
All the best and I am sure you'll find someone to love and someone who loves you.
2007-12-06 16:12:44 · answer #4 · answered by babasbhakta 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
not in a real marriage.. maybe marry a person that's in a wheel chair.. paralyzed from the neck down.. then you would be both happy if your looking for a marriage with out sex its more of a caring friend ship..
2016-03-15 08:37:42 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who are these hurtful people that would say such cruel things to you? I agree with some previous answers... love yourself, because everyone is special. If you get comfortable with who you are- and stop letting others create the way you feel about yourself... you will attract someone else with a healthy self-image and have a positive relationship. Take control of your future now- and stop giving others the power to hold you back. You are worth it!
2007-12-06 16:36:56 · answer #6 · answered by Mama3838 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When someone loves you they don't see your body in a way that other people see. They loves you because they know you are a beautiful person by your heart and spirit. I was so self conscious about my body but my husband loves my body he says that nobody is perfect. And if you love someone you will everything so beautiful and good about him/her no matter what people think of him/her. About the kiss So nobody is perfect but it takes time to make things better.
2007-12-06 16:25:48 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are insecure about your body, why don't you do something to change it? Start working out, eat better, go to a salon and get waxed....there are lots of ways to improve how you look. Don't give up already at the age of 24!
2007-12-06 16:17:05 · answer #8 · answered by Jacqueline D 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you get married your husband loves u the way you r, u will never get married nor have a healthy realationship if you have so much low self esteem about urself. marriage w/o sex is a very very very non healthy marriage unless it couldn't be done.
and most importantly u must love urself b4 u can love anyone else.
2007-12-06 16:12:46 · answer #9 · answered by puffy2step 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Guys don't get married just so they can hand you a check book. No sex = unhappy husband.
All your conditions you describe can be changed.
2007-12-06 16:25:02 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋