Wife moving out, question for girls?

Question

My wife is moving out and living with her nan, but she'll be spending weekends at our place

we agreed some time apart each week will benefit each other and maybe help our relationship.

my question is, what can I do around the house or to myself (like work out) to show my wife that I love her with all my heart and care about her, should I maybe refurnish the house or cook her a nice meal or something?

she's living with her NAN, her GRANDMOTHER, THE MOTHER OF HER MOTHER.

not her man, her man is me!

I work really long hours during the week and she is home all day, part of the reason she moved out is to be able to talk to someone during the weekdays.

our relationship is pretty much fine apart from financial problems, I was just looking for ways to make her feel more loved that's all. :)

plus her nan is getting old and needs a hand around the place

Answer 1

Think of something that she would really appreciate the most and do it. Like, if she's been wanting the kitchen painted - paint it. If the house is a mess, clean it. If she likes a certain meal, cook it for her.

Really, though, it's the little things that most women notice the most. We spend a lot of time analyzing the details, while guys tend to notice the broader picture and not even pay attention. Not a bad thing, just the way it is. So try to pay attention to details.

Hope everything works out for you!

Answer 2

Refurnishing the house, cooking a nice meal, other things like that are just fluff. They are not going to bring your wife back.

However, making sure the house is clean, and she doesn't have to do any extra work to take care of it while she is there (she should help with the chores) is a good idea so she doesn't feel put upon by coming home.

If you want to improve your relationship, you need to determine what is wrong with it. Is the problem that she feels you don't pay her enough attention? Then schedule plenty of one on one time with her while she is there. Is the problem that the two of you are not communicating? Perhaps you can schedule a counseling session and ask her to attend. Or attend some counseling during the week on your own.

Doing nice things, getting back to the way things were when you are dating - those things could bring her back for a while, but you really need to work on the HEART of the problem - resolve the issues between the two of you - if you want the relationship to work.

By the way, sometimes just telling her how much you love her will let her feel appreciated.

Answer 3

So let me get this right... you'er having financial problems, yet you are thinking about refurnishing the house?? First of all, that's a slap in the face to the woman who isn't there anymore. She decorated the home, and you refurnishing it takes her out of it. That's exactly the opposite of what you are trying to accomplish.

The whole idea is to do something for her!! I know you work long hours, but can you get off early on friday and be there cooking her a nice meal when she gets home? Maybe have some fresh flowers for her. Maybe consider having some bubble bath or something just for her to relax.

Make her feel appreciated. Make sure there aren't alot of chores to be done in the home, so you can actually spend quality time together. If you have to, hire a maid for a day. They really aren't that expensive. Make sure all her clothes are nicely folded and ready for her to put away or hanging already.

Maybe have a nice gift for her too. Something small, but special. Her favorite movie, or favorite candy bar. Something small and simple, but with her in mind. Just a way to tell her you missed her.

Answer 4

"her nan?" Who is that? A nanny or another man? or Grandma?

If it's a man: Urgent, you read Divorce Busters right away if you still want her. It will tell you how to deal with a cheater, cheating, and the other woman or man - get it now.

-Do not argue with her, but do not agree with cheating either. If she starts to say something derogatory, just say "You're right, I'm late" - that diffuses the argument. Just keep a small amount of money in your wallet in case she asks you for money and if she does, open your wallet and give it all to her.

-Don't try to be controlling or stalk her or anything like that

-Be Prince Charming: kind, attentive, and helpful and fun. She needs to have some fun with you.

-Don't criticize, nag, or bring up any bad subjects

- Don't flirt, do porn, or oogle other women at all. If a woman comes up and talks to you, refer her to your wife no matter what. Just say "my wife knows all about that" and turn away.

-Invite her to go Christmas shopping with you one evening during the week because weekends are too crowded. Stop for hot chocolate or a snack afterwards.

-Bring her a cup of tea, served in a dainty cup w/a chocolate or cookie. Put it on a tray with a doily or cloth napkin lining the tray and a cloth or paper (if you use that) napkin to be used w/lemon slice, honey or sugar, and cream or milk

-Don't redecorate unless you really know her taste - favorite color, style, etc. - think about this one for awhile. Maybe make it a celebration of her return. Women usually like to pick out their own things.

-Pray, for her, go to church, and read your Bible. God is on your side. And the minister and brothers will pray for you and her too. Invite her to the church too and introduce her to everyone as Miss Universe or My Beloved Bride (always introduce her that way everywhere you go).

-You don't say what her issues are against you, but each must be worked on and resolved. Example: if you were working too much and neglecting her - you must tell her she's right, apologize and schedule special time for her every week

Actually, living apart is not a good idea unless there was violence. Otherwise you need to get her back as soon as possible. Invite her to one of those Christmas decorated home tours or a Dickens Christmas Faire.

Joy to you!

Answer 5

What the???? Living with her NAN or MAN?? If she's living with another man why in the hell would you be so dead set on showing her how much you love her? Let her go! I used to be married and I don't buy the whole "we need time apart" thing. F that! Either you work on it together or don't work on it at all. The way I see it is this....If you two need time apart, it leaves room for ERROR and room for someone else to move into the picture if they haven't already. And don't refurnish the house,,,that's just dumb!

Answer 6

The best thing to do is to use this time apart as a time to work on yourself. Get back in tune with parts of yourself that attracted your wife to you or parts that you didnt have enough time to think about when you were together. A good place to start is to cook her a good meal, but dont do anything drastic like refurbish the house. A good meal always sets a relaxing atmosphere and puts you in a relaxed state of mind. Really think about what it is you want to accomplish at the end of this, and then both of you set goals to reach that. Compromise is one of the hardest parts and also the key to a good marriage. I wish the very best to you.

Answer 7

I wouldn't refurnish the house....That may appear as though you are starting "new" without her and have implications. Like out with the old in with the new. She may take it the wrong way. But I like the dinner thing. Cook her a nice meal and let her know how much you appreciate and love her.

Answer 8

Try to plan something spontaneous and special for the times that she is there, recreate your first date maybe; I like the cooking dinner idea as well. You need to try to make it more like your "courting" phase of your relationship was so that you both can remember why you fell in love in the first place. Good luck, so nice to see a man trying to work it out!

Answer 9

first, things have gotten that bad that the 2 of you aren't going to live together anymore, except on the week-end. there's more to this story than is being told. there is no way in the world that you 2 living in separate homes is going to help your relationship. i wouldn't be surprised that in a few weeks the week-end deal will be over. Don't be stupid! Something is Up! If you aren't together you cant talk things out and resolve issues that are causing your problems. hope I'm wrong, just sounds fishy.

Answer 10

Talk to her at least three times in the day, send her warm SMS-es, email her love poems, deliver flowers at her doorstep... the sky's the limit, young man.

Think of what her wish list is and build on that slowly. I remember during my first wedding anniversary... we didn't have much money then... My husband shelled out all the money he had and bought me wind chimes. Doesn't sound exciting... but I had told him I wanted one for our home. I still remember that sweet gift.

You are already there... just be observant and caring.