Note: The answers below the 'warning' numbers are mine.
Failure To Follow These Warnings Could Cause Serious Injury Or Death. Part 1...(humor)
'Does my insurance company get to choose which one? '
1. No Smoking.
'These cigarette prices? I'll be through in a minute.'
2. Turn off engine and all electronics.
'****, there goes my pacemaker.'
3. Fill portable containers on the ground.
'As opposed to.......'
4. Discharge your static electricity before fueling.
'ok. In winter, I'll just take a cab everywhere.'
5. If a fire starts, do not remove nozzle.
'Who gets to tell NASA about the unscheduled launch? '
6. Never allow children to use pump.
'Hell, there goes 99% of your gas business! '
7. Do not leave pump unattended when pumping.
'Maybe the pump needs a shrink for anxiety/depression disorder.'
2007-12-06 15:50:16 · 11 answers · asked by Elysabeth 7 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
yes I have, but your's is better, I'm still laughing!!!!!!!
2007-12-07 07:08:23 · answer #1 · answered by poopsie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hazards of The Pump
Gas, when ingested, is seldom digested!
Bring your own clothespin and hand sanitizer...
You'll be much wealthier and wiser.
What's all the fuming about gas?
Soaring prices, so what eagles soar!
Deep pockets lined, no glut, no low, just slow.
How many times is the freaking clip broke
And you are forced to hang on to that damn bloke?
Warning, before reentering vehicle, wash yourself
As inhalation of gas on hands is dangerous.
Remember, next time buy a hybrid and eliminate GAS!!!
Valrie in Ocala Florida
2007-12-06 16:20:22 · answer #2 · answered by mariposavalrie 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The answer is living can be hazardous to your health
We must tilt, not merely poke at windmills
The pancho in and on each of us is not protection
from the cold reign of terror being unleashed ,
not from the shores of Tripoli, but from the classrooms at
West Point.
We have turned the cradle of civilization into the grave of reason.
2007-12-06 16:18:50 · answer #3 · answered by Stephen C 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I will be a rocket girl,
Burning out my fuse up here alone.
Come on baby light my fire!
Burn baby, burn,
Disco inferno.
There goes Miss Siouxxi Bright,
Faster than light,
For she had not heeded the warnings
on the gas pump.
Boogie, Boogie, Boogie Alllllll gone!
2007-12-06 22:01:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Exactly just what kind of gas station do you go to anyway, one that gives blue chip stamps? With these new fangled cars that's on the road these days, you're lucky to be able to find the gas tank.........
2007-12-06 16:20:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Living in Montreal, we get all of this in French. So, I have read them and I find that they are obnoxiously the same here - doesn't anyone use any common sense? Or are most people that ignorant?!?!?!?!?!?!
2007-12-08 09:08:19 · answer #6 · answered by lynnemarton13 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just assume those warnings are for the ordinary people, not for ME. I rarely pay attention to that kind of crap.
2007-12-07 00:38:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Those are good ones, but my favorite is reading some of them on McDonald's drive thrus --
Braille menu upon request -- ok sure who thought of that one?
2007-12-06 15:58:42 · answer #8 · answered by Diane B 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, does this mean I can't smoke when I pump gas anymore?
2007-12-06 15:58:29 · answer #9 · answered by sun day 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
lol
2007-12-06 23:03:07 · answer #10 · answered by hymy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋