I really need some help figuring out what's going on. I'm married, and about 2 months ago I met this guy at my work, who is a customer and he seems to like me and of coarse I like him too.After I get off, I just cant stop thinking about him. When I'm at work, I'm waiting for him to come in - it's crazy.I know he was married, and I guess not any more. I love my husband but I have strange feelings towards this guy.For example, today I asked a co worker if she's seen him (cuz she's the one that told me that one can tell we like each other) and like 5 secs later he comes in. She said it was funny how I sensed him.Anywayz, I love my husband and I would never want to hurt him, but I also want to be happy myself, and right now I'm very confused. Has anyone been in this situation? What would you do?
2007-12-06 12:35:14 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You need to get at the root of what it is about this guy that attracts you and what is missing in your relationship with your husband that you are seeking to fulfill.... Then you really need to talk to your hubby and see if he can fill your need.... but, in the meantime, do whatever it takes to get your mind off this other guy... and spend that energy and need for attention with your husband...
Too often we build this "fantasy" of a guy that fills all the holes in our current relationships and don't realize that at the end of the day, this guy also forgets to wash the dishes, leaves the toilet seat up, and scratches his rear too! lol... In other words, focus on your relationship with your hubby!!!!
2007-12-06 12:40:29 · answer #1 · answered by Wildflower 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
It is a fact that there isn't just one person in the world we can be attracted to and fall in love with.....there are tons of them. It is normal to find others attractive, but you have chosen your husband so you need to forget this infatuation (that is what it is at the moment) and think about the things that made you fall in love with him. If your marriage is becoming routine then spice it up with some new experiences, start flirting with him again, have a date night, act out some fantasies, and take some chances and try new things in the bedroom. Marriage is hard work and you have to make it exciting. If you go with this new crush thinking it will make you happy, then you will start a cycle you can't stop, and each time a relationship becomes routine you will leave instead of changing it.
2007-12-06 20:56:21 · answer #2 · answered by ScSpec 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
My ex left me for one of those exact 'guys'. It's not your fault I guess, but questions like this make me never ever want to get married again. This shows that no matter how well your husband treats you, all it takes is something else to catch a girl's (or a guy's) eye to make them think about 'themselves'. I mean, look at how you worded it, 'I love my husband... but I also want to by happy myself...' Are you NOT happy with your husband? If you aren't you should LEAVE HIM first then start fishing for other men, not the other way around, and I know for a fact if he saw this post and knew it was his wife I'd be out of his mind right now, and terribly hurt... either grow up or divorce the man to save him from the pain you would cause him by cheating on him, which is where your line of thought is going to lead you...
2007-12-06 20:53:05 · answer #3 · answered by Heart of Stone 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well by the way you are repeating how you love your husband and how you are married etc ... I can tell you truly don't give a crap about him. no seriously, admit it, you don't. you are trying to convince yourself of that but it is only because you have remorse of the feelings you have for this other guy and what you truly want to do with him ... which is sleep with him. So i don't think you have a problem you are just looking for acceptance and closure so you won't feel bad about cheating. Go back to your husband, love him and make things a new once again. good luck.
2007-12-06 20:48:51 · answer #4 · answered by caliguy_30 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would stop any flirting with the guy who comes into your work, maybe have someone else help him out. and focus on your husband, if after time, you are unhappy with your husband and want to leave him. leave him. then have some time alone and then talk to this guy or another guy. but don't have an affair, and don't make any fast moves. You could regret it. I really think marriages have their ups and downs, and you really have to make sure you know what you are doing, and everything is always going to be better with someone else....
2007-12-06 20:59:50 · answer #5 · answered by pink 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Being attracted to some one is human nature.. but, thinking of doing something outside of your marriage could be a disaster waiting to happen. maybe, the other guy is just looking for a quickie ...just put yourself in the shoes ... how would you like your husband flirting with another woman and thinking about cheating? not a good feeling... I have had that situation happen.. and it's just a "that's nice feeling" and throw it out the door... you risk too much for a quickie that will never lead to anything.
2007-12-06 20:41:33 · answer #6 · answered by shelly v 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for 16 sorry yrs. I also go thru that. I have fallen in love with lots of woman and had extreme crushes on them. Its like everyday I fall in love with a new woman other than my wife. This is so strange and weird. I guess this is normal-huh?
2007-12-06 20:50:03 · answer #7 · answered by pain_of_unhappiness 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dose this guy just "like" you or is he madly in love with you and wants to spend the rest of his life with you? If he just likes you, don't waste your time because you already have a guy that wants to spend the rest of his life with you, your husband! It sounds like infatuation and this can magnify even the smallest cracks in your marriage.
2007-12-06 20:46:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I was in your situation I'd got a crush on my husband's younger male friend I met in the house. He was kind of another man I never felt to my husband. A firm body and tantalizing eyes. After the dinner, I had dreamed with him making love to me until I made him to regulary fantasized during our love making with my hubby.
It happened that my husband during our sex was exhausted he failed to gave me climax. He persuaded to let me fantacize to help reach my cums. I asked and talked to my hubby about his friend if it's ok if I try his friend in my fantasies. My hubby approved it and infact, after I confessed to him that I liked his friend, he talked and arranged for it and made my fantasy real, one night full of sex with his younger friend. I know it would be not the same with your situation because my husband is not like your hubby, wonderful husband to me full of understanding. Yours might be different.
If I were you, why not try to be honest and tell your husband that you like some one to have sex experience, just for fun only? Make it a joke? But if he becomes mad, ask him an apology that you are just only kidding, to test him what would be his feeling? If he would approve it, your lucky? But if your hubby get mad after you tell him, find ways to end to a short time at motel near you with that customer but be sure that is only for fun and sex experience you are wanting with him which will never be repeated again. Keep it secrete and be careful for other people to noticed what you are doing to avoid criticism of immorality. I understand how wonderful heaven to make love to someone you feel very special, like your customer! Control yourself to be fall in love with that customer to save your marriage relationship with your husband. Don't change your treatment to him, just double your attention to your husband after your experienced with your customer. Good Luck sweetie!
2007-12-08 05:31:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
naughty naughty girl. Go ahead and give it up. You know you want to!
2007-12-06 20:54:37 · answer #10 · answered by jeff b 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋