How come whenever my friend w/benefits & I hook up I spend the rest of the day feeling sad & wishing I could of spent more time with him? We live about 45 minutes away from each other & don't get to see each other very often...maybe 3 or 4 times a month. We both work full time & we're both single parents. He's not looking for a serious relationship b/c he has alot going on w/work....but says he has feelings for me. Usually the routine is....we hook up & spend about an hour together & then we have to leave. He usually has to leave....he works alot out of town.(& yes this is verifiable...he really does) But I am so glad when I do get to see him but then so sad afterwards. What's with this?!
2007-12-06 11:32:16 · 10 answers · asked by love my life 2 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
It seems you have feelings for him as well and maybe you want to take it further into a relationship. It doesn't seem feasible right now because he works a lot out of town, you both have kids and work full time. I would be upset and it is quite normal to be.
2007-12-06 11:47:01 · answer #1 · answered by wonderwoman 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like you're having a hard time admitting to yourself that you like him more than is appropriate for this type of "relationship". Stuff like this rarely works out well. One party usually ends up wanting more than the other, or one meets someone else and ends up hurting the other. I'm sad to say that I hurt a friend of mine because we embarked on a "friends-with-benefits" type of relationship. I realised very quickly that I had no romantic feelings for him, whereas he made it very clear how much he liked me, and he ended up allowing me to use him because he liked me and knew I didn't feel the same, but preferred to have something than nothing. I hated it and it was very destructive for us both - we don't speak anymore. People think that they can have no-strings sex with a "friend" but I don't think it can work. There are always feelings involved. I think you should get out while you still can, before you're in too deep. You should be with someone who can give you a fulfilling relationship, not just an hour a week. You deserve more than that, this kind of thing will just end up leaving you feeling empty and unloved. Think of yourself and what might make you happy. I wish you well :-)
2007-12-06 19:43:18 · answer #2 · answered by Fröken Fräken 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's like when people say they don't have time to exercise, but if they really wanted to put
the time in....they would make the effort. This guy tells you how very busy he is, BUT if he truly wanted to see you more...he would make the effort! You even said that he is called your "friend with benefits"......that's a booty call, not Love and certainly not a relationship.
It is what it is.
2007-12-06 19:42:37 · answer #3 · answered by ANewLife 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your feelings are becoming stronger as time goes on and you want something more, you will have to share these feelings with him and see where it goes from there.
2007-12-06 19:37:17 · answer #4 · answered by karenpghblue 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you apparently like him a LOT..
and want to be more than friends
maybe you should drop hints
although; if he's like me or my brother he may be pretty slow at understanding when someone wants to take it to the next level
2007-12-06 19:35:37 · answer #5 · answered by Yuri ^_^ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
U <3 him...... and u want a relationship...
2007-12-06 19:36:00 · answer #6 · answered by KoalaBear 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe because you have feelings for him and every-time he leaves you feel like you've done something wrong
2007-12-06 19:36:53 · answer #7 · answered by kechelle s 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you feel that way because he is more than a friend to you
2007-12-06 19:37:06 · answer #8 · answered by BeachBum 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like to me he's married to someone that you don't know about
2007-12-06 19:49:15 · answer #9 · answered by Juanita T 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He's married...Move on
2007-12-06 19:38:34 · answer #10 · answered by Terry C. 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋