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I have an amazing husband.
He is selfless,extremely caring,basically an all around INCREDIBLE man.

But,I sometimes feel bad because he puts me so far ahead of himself.
I'm 5 months pregnant,and I understand that he feels the need to "pamper" me,but I feel like he is just forgetting about his own needs.
Ex:ample: He has like 4 pairs of pants for work,that are all tore up,and he has been saying that he needs new pants.But when we go shopping he is so concentrated on getting something for me that he puts his need for new pants on the back burner,I'll go over to the men's section to look for stuff for him and he'll just be like ,"No,I really don't need new pants all that bad."
I'm not selfish either,and I know that's how this is coming across,but I try to get him to do things for himself,and he won't.
He can bring me home stuff everyday and its fine.
But the other day I surprised him with some new clothes and he was like,"Babe why did you do that?I told you I don't need them.."

2007-12-06 10:16:49 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

I try to get him to see that it hurts me when he doesnt want me to do things for him because it makes me feel like a selfish wife.

I just wish he cared for himself like he cares for me..

any advice?

2007-12-06 10:18:56 · update #1

18 answers

First, thank God that you have a man who cares so much for you at this time in your life.

Second, get it across to him that to have him accept a gift of new clothes from you will also make you happy, and assure him that accepting a gift does not make him selfish. You just have to assert yourself with him a little more.

2007-12-06 11:37:44 · answer #1 · answered by kellygirlaj 4 · 0 0

Money can be hard at times and perhaps he knows he can't provide for you the baby to come himself and the house food etc.. so he wants to make sure his princess is always taken care of first how sweet he is.

Well xmas is coming so you can buy some pants tops underwear and get him something just for him you know he really wants. if you can afford these things. If not I would save my pennies anyway i could to get him something extra special.

I'm glad you bought him those things he really needed them and he was just pretending he didnt'.. so good for you.

deep down he appreciates it for sure. He just doesn't want you spending money you probably both can't afford but you did the right thing here. You can cut back on something else. or have more soup or rice dinners for a extra week.

well all the best to you both. So nice to hear a couple being treated so nice. wish you both a long successful marriage and i hope money comes your way im sure it will in time.

2007-12-06 19:12:31 · answer #2 · answered by For ever in my Heart 7 · 0 0

Wow i want him only kidding1 I got a husband that is selfless but that was at the start of our marriage we have been married for 10/5 years now and he has started to look after himself more it started around the time we had our first child you will find it will calm down and when the baby comes things will start to turn, then you will be saying what about me. so my advice go with flow!

2007-12-06 10:40:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

i'd recommend which you do exactly no longer project approximately this mess. he's conflicted in his love for her and his appreciate for you. If this money isn't coming promptly out of your pocket and he can somewhat have the money for it then that's no longer a project. If his time with you is being affected then discover some different thank you to occupy a while jointly as is together with her as in get a activity and another separate acquaintances. If she is being a byoch..curse her axx out very quietly and methodically interior the kitchen with a knife on your hand and be carried out with that and don't enable any disrespect at every time from her. be helpful to apply "nasty unaccountable cheesy azzI" on your description of her. If mandatory, go into yet another room whilst she is at your place. only be straight forward and consumer-friendly together with her. if he starts to speak approximately her, only tell him which you do no longer desire to communicate her because it reasons you a "super deal of rigidity which reasons wrinkles." in some unspecified time interior the destiny she would be able to advance up and pass on and if no longer, his is your husband for existence or you are able to go away his drama with him and go directly to the subsequent one. I wager you're far greater deserving than this mess. good luck.

2016-11-13 21:50:30 · answer #4 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I wouldn't' worry about this too much maybe he is just doing this since you are pregnant and wants to be a good supportive husband. Buy him what he needs and let him know he deserves it for being a good hubby and soon to be daddy. If he continues like this after the baby and your still worried then talk about how you feel about the situation and tell him he needs to put his needs on the list too.

2007-12-06 10:25:22 · answer #5 · answered by Txgirl23 4 · 1 0

wow great man. As his wife go shopping and put it in his closet. U are the wife, but it seems that u go along with what he said. Tell me did u return the clothes that he says that he does not need. I hope not. Just put ur foot down. Try this everytime he buys you something, say no im not taking it until you buy ur self something. and be very firm.

2007-12-06 10:22:21 · answer #6 · answered by yayohelpme 3 · 2 0

You r sooooooooooooooo lucky. Enjoy the pampering and find small subtle ways to let him know you care too! I just had an arguement with my husband tonight because he's unsupportive so relax and let him be the great hubby he is.

2007-12-06 10:35:56 · answer #7 · answered by mollie5 1 · 1 0

I remember studying this before..its something like being passive controlling. They are want all the 'points' for being the awesome spouse.

I encourage you to tell him that sometimes, whether he needs it or not, you WANT to do things for him just because it makes YOU feel good to give him things. The pampering shouldnt be one-sided.

2007-12-06 10:35:24 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Aww that is sweet get him the new pants and put your foot downt hat he is not to take them back tell him it makes you feel good getting him the clothes he needs the fact that it makes you feel good may make him feel better about it

Congrats on the baby

2007-12-06 10:28:52 · answer #9 · answered by ღKrissyღ 5 · 0 0

U got urself a good man there honey....it's sounds like he is one great man and is soooo excited aout being a daddy.... i don't think u come across as selfish and i wouldn't feel bad, let him spoil u ur his wife and the mother of his unborn child.... it sounds to me like u both support each other and do nice things and spoil each other......ur 2 very lucky people.. However don't ever take him for granted and don't let him take u for granted either.....good luck with ur baby honey and enjoy ur man....... x

2007-12-06 10:23:13 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1 0

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