Can I date him?

Question

Reasons for and against please

Do you think it's okay for a 31 year old guy to date a 16 year old(american's please note this is legal in my country)?
I don't know this guy but I've seen him around and want to ask him out,what do you think?

IronCity-it's the UK.

Answer 1

Legal or not, why would you want to. He may seem worldly and sophisticated now, but in a few years he's going to see like what he is...an old man. Look for someone you can have a future with.

Answer 2

This one is unsually...

Normally hes too grown up due to if hes had a normal life...

You wont have much in common and would work that out yourself.



But not everyone has had a normal life.


it could be well that hes had a lousy time with girls and clueless about dating, no idea how to impress girls and actually at a similar level to a 16 year olds possibley still a virgin.


Who cant realte to those his age all in long term realtioships or with kids when he has not even dated anyone for a few weeks.


And still into the same stuff as when he was 16...

In that case I cant see much wrong in it.

You both like clubbing and cinema and most likely similar music but as the 16 year old matures you probably drift apart but maybe what each other needs.



So I wont dismiss it straight away or automatically accuse the older guy of being some kind of perve as often its simily not the case...


May just drift through teens and twenties missing out so basically an overgrown teenager possibly still living at home.

So If I was brother/parent/friend.


My concerns are is he a nice guy, naughty but nice is fine... do you have stuff in common and would you be mates if not lovers, is he responsible ie with safety not all suity.

If he going to make you life fun ?

Does he have a history or abusing others or ending up the girls mate?

Just as somone is your age does not make them ok the person could be an ashole be he 16, 18 or 31 or nice.


So thats how I look at things


Abuse is abuse its clearn and deliberate but just as somone is older does not make them abusive...



Also some need to lean maths... ie when you are 30 hes 60? bull learn maths guys that would make him 45.

As said I see little problem other then if you get serious what happens if you want to go uni can he come and live with you? or if you go back packing he cant work as visa limits are 30 and stuff like that

Answer 3

what do your parents think? Is he their age? I don't think it's wrong, as long as he respects you, and doesn't try to take advantage of you. If you are more mature than your peers, then it may be right, but be careful. Sometimes a man that age going after a girl your age, has something wrong with him, and that's why he isn't dating women his age. Or, maybe he is OK, just be careful. And above all, don't get into a serious relationship with him unless you are married. And don't marry anyone unless you are sure they are THE ONE you will spend the rest of your life with.
But don't become involved with him just because your home life isn't good [if that's the case], that isn't the answer.I don't know if this helped. Just be careful. Check him out thoroughly first, and make sure he doesn't have serious issues.

Answer 4

Well this depends on what part of the world you are standing on. In the United States this would not at all be acceptable to our culture. However this may be perfectly normal in the UK.

I was only 14 when I was in London, and I don't remember any older women hitting on me.

Answer 5

Well I think that you should not be with someone that is old enough to be you dad. Because he is 15 years older than you. But if you have feelings for him, then go for it. Talk to him and see what happens. Good Luck to you. I wish you all the happiness in the world.

Edit: Ok to all you that say that he is way too old for her, age doesn't really matter. And sex is not everything. She isn't asking if they should have sex. What if he could be her true love. And someone does not know how to count. When he turns 60 she will be 45 not 30.

Answer 6

If it's legal and both of you wish to date each other, then by all means do so.

Edit: And it has only been about three generations (30 = 1 generation) since this sort of thing fell out of common practice. How people became such prudes in so short a time is beyond me.

BTW Believe it or not, for centuries on end up until 100 to 120 years ago, girls were wooed at the age of 10 and married at the age of 12 by males of all ages. It is only very recently then that this has stopped being done. So thinking it is unnatural for a man to want to be with a young woman of 16 is actually the unnatural thing.

Answer 7

No its not okay, a man of his age is far too experienced to be with someone your age, its not the fact that there is 15 years between you, its the fact that you are just too young to even consider going after someone of that age, theres no hurry to grow up, be with boys your own age. In all honesty, most people who saw you together would think that this guy is some kind of pervert, regardless of the law on age etc, it just looks wrong.

Answer 8

NO way! first you are way to young for him, secondly he's old enough to be your dad, and if he is a decent guy, he would probably won't take that serious and laugh it off because you're a 16 years old that is infatuated with him right now. he may seems mature and you might like him, but you don't know him or his personality. he might turn out to be a jerk or worse, a stalker! so, its best to stick with your own age group for right now. then when you're a little bit older, like 21 or so then do what you want, but right now, you're still a minor.

Answer 9

16 is a tough age for a woman. it will take a few years for men your age to catch up to you emotionally. Girls mature faster than boys into adulthood. That is why now you are interested in older men. It will pass, and it is all normal, you are not alone.

Answer 10

i don't want to be rude like the other people because I'm not rude i want u to listen to this info is the reason why he is hot if so u should get to know him before u decide to go out with him because who knows he might have a different personalty then u thought because have u even talked to him before well if not u should get to no him i would not date a guy that much older than u but if u really fall in love it was meant to be bc i always say if its wat other ppl think of the guy u like (bad) and u break up with him u will never forget him it happened to me before
Final- i say yes if u r in love but no if u only like him bc he is hot but if u only like him bc he is hot there is a right guy out there for u
Good Luck with wat ever u chose,
kkmmgirls2 ♥