When I came out to my friends as a bisexual and told them about my dating a lesbian, some of my friends became extreamly stand offish. One of my friends is a girl, and me and her used to be the best of friends, yet when I came out we continued to hang out until one day she flat out said to me that I make her uncomfortable. I don't even hit on her, or say anything about my sexual life to her! I don't know what to do about people like this! It makes me so angry! What do I do??
2007-12-06 03:00:20 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I am a bi-sexual myself and when I recently told my best female friend of 6 years, whom I am very very close with, she was absolutley fine. She does not have a hair of gay in her, yet she is always asking me how my girl's going, or what we're up to that night. Also my girl friend is a lesbian not bi and she has plenty of straigh friends that are women who are totally 100% comfortable being around her ...and me! So you see, you are that special kind of person that can find love in any human-despite gender-and you'll learn that you need to surround yourself with people full of as much love as you have. Continue to be kind to her but do not bend over backwards...because if she cared about you, this would not be an issue!!! Find new friends girly!!! They ARE out there! Good luck, and remember to be proud of yourself!
2007-12-06 03:38:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I not gay in fact i'm sad that so many girly girls are now saying that they are lesbian or bi-sexual. Personal I think a lot of you are turn out and thats why you get guy's who say get a pole or girl's who have nick name like freak and green loud hair. (I know how tomboys are made i've watch and learnt) Well what ever you should had been honest with your friend from the start I guess you didn't know you was bi-sexual then.. But if you did then you was in fact the one being untrustworthy and I can see why your friend would feel uncomfortable around you even if you don't hit on her. She may though she could hang out with you untill she really start seeing the change in you. the person she once use was opening up to a new world that she had no plan to be in who part of. As they say you can't pick your family but you can pick your friends and she most probably though the friend she had picked like'd the same fun like her. But you when one level higher that she couldn't follow babe. Now I know you feel a lot of pain but when you did you change she wasn't there and now you been touch in way's that the mind can not forget you got to make a choice like your friend did hold on or leave. the QUESTION is what would you had done if she held out on you when you had just met her early on in your friendship. Remember she not the one who's changed she is still the same just not with you and that it's in fact you that had changed into someone new. After saying all this your still human and I hope all the best history never goes, but when you learn to cope the pain fades away then it starts all over again.
The member grapenut...
Also a bi-sexual recently told her best friend she was bi-sexual and was fine about it. in fact her friend always ask's her how's her girl's going, and so on. Maybe you two can took up and show this world love just remember to not leave out the single fat guy's or the bald head lesbian's. hint hint!! you will get old 2007 will not be the year forever.
2007-12-06 12:47:25 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't owe anyone an explanation of your orientation. Many people are uncomfortable with change or lifestyle. If you told her you had cancer, she would probably treated you the same way thinking she could catch it. True friends may be uncomfortable at first, they may ask questions, watch how you act around them until they accept it and get comfortable, but they don't treat you with disrespect. Those that do were never true friends to start with.
God does not make mistakes and you don't choose your gender preference, you are born the way you are, it is NOT a sin. Every person has the right to love and be loved regardless of the gender persuasion.
2007-12-06 11:26:58 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds to me like she really doesnt have a problem with it but has been taking heat from other people about hanging with you and she is upset about it. I say give her some time to think about it. If you guys dont hang for a while and she misses the friendship she will decide that they dont matter. If she is so shallow that what they think is most important than you then you prolly just lost a friendship that was on rocky ground anyways. Course there is always the possibility that being friends with you is making her think about some deep issues she has with herself. I feel the important thing is, if her friendship is important to you, dont be mean if she comes back to apologize and ask if you can be friends again!
2007-12-06 11:19:40 · answer #4 · answered by secsidana 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh trust me, it makes me ferious too. You can't really do anything but i would stop being her friend. A friend is supposed to support you and trust you and care. Do you think you are losing that? In my expereince aruging with someone being gay just made me lose friends. Its kind of like saying to a christian that satanic is the way to go and you must believe it. People won't take it. Its just the way their personality is and she has to grow up and get used to it that there is people out there like that.
2007-12-06 11:07:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Friends who don't accept you as you are are not really friends, after all.
Find friends with whom you have things in common. If you care about this friend, continue to invite her to hang out with you and your g/f or other friends. Maybe she'll learn that nobody is defined by their sexuality. With that said, make your sexuality part of you, not all of you. To do otherwise will make others uncomfortable.
2007-12-06 11:05:21 · answer #6 · answered by fumblingkc 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
she is just not a true friend ,, if she thinks like that then why be friends with her ... she should understand you and accept you ...
if im on your side i will stop talking to her since she dont support of what you feel ..
there is still lot of person you can be friend with and hang out ..
2007-12-06 11:24:38 · answer #7 · answered by pinoy ako!!! 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ditch them, they aint your real friends if there treating you like that hun.
2007-12-06 11:08:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
well sorry to say but u shouyld stop hangin around her.
she might get ok with it one day
or
she might stay that why
but u should start makein new friends
cuz most likely people dont change
2007-12-06 11:17:34 · answer #9 · answered by so lost 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't need to surround yourself with "friends" like that....there are more and more good people accepting of alternative lifestyles
2007-12-06 11:15:37 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋