Why do people let their looks fade after they get married?

Answer 1

Most of the time when we marry we begin to feel too comfortable in our relationship. We have worked sooooo hard the past few years or months to get to this point in our life and we feel we have earned our place in the relationship and no longer have to try to impress our partner. They married you so they must love you no matter what, right?
Well, we need to keep in mind that the person we date is the person we intend to marry. The woman who shaves her legs daily, fixes her hair and makeup, smells nice, dresses sexy, fixes dinner, gives her man lots of 'lovin' and.......the man who romances his woman with cards, flowers, sweet words, and bubble bath, and the man who provides and protects her. What happens when we are dating someone who has all those great qualities and we really want to marry them, but after the vows they change? We lose interest in our partner and start becoming interested in the neighbor or co-worker who gives us 'extra' attention and cares about their appearance. Why do we fix up and try to look our best when we are single? We are using bait, to get someone.......so, why shouldn't we be doing the same to KEEP them? No man wants to come home to his wife dressed in sweats, unbathed, a messy house, and a peanut butter sandwich on the table for dinner and no woman wants to open doors for herself, spend Valentine's Day without flowers and a card, or not be pampered by her man.
People just become too comfortable with each other in marriage. They become brother and sister instead of friend and lover. Just think about what keeps a relationship alive and exciting the first 6 months. The sex, the romance, the love, the respect, the EFFORT.........
I'm not saying that things will always be cheery and fun, but we tend to try to make them more fun when we date than when we marry. Marriage is looked upon as a time of mourning, which is so very sad. Instead it should be looked at as an opportunity and a challenge, not a struggle, to be the best person to our partner in every way that we can possibly be.
The key to keeping the spark alive in marriage is the effort we choose to put into it. We can make excuses all we want (tired, kids, bills, family, friends, etc), but when we find ourselves divorced and alone we suddenly have time to do the things we never did when we were married.
It's all about priority and what's really important to us. If we are married that marriage should be the most important thing, second only to God.

Good luck and God Bless

Answer 2

Well, everyone's looks fade, married or not. They may seem to fade a little more quickly in married people since they, by nature, become more comfortable in each other's presence.
When you are just dating, it is fairly easy to always be perfectly coiffed, clothed and made-up when you see your beloved. When you begin cohabitating, it would be extemely stressful and difficult to keep this up constantly, for long. There are probably a lot of newly married brides who won't even remove their makeup before going to bed. Eventually, you get past this, and might go for a whole day without makeup at home. Plus, everyone wants to be in comfy clothes - starting with in your home - and eventually spreading to other places. It would be nice if married people tried to look their best for each other ( a few will), but bills, children, household chores etc. usually put this on the back burner.

Answer 3

Many moms put their childrens welfare before their own. They are busy working, taking care of the home and have limited funds. They will usually put their energy into buying for the children before theirselves and don't have much time to be the glamorous person they were before a family.

Also, men and women seem to feel very comfortable being who they are, without the makeup and fancy clothes. They will dress up and such to attend an event, but usually love each other for who they are; not what they look like.

If you are talking about being overweight; well much of that can come from child-bearing, drinking beer. Think most try to keep that weight off, but vegetables and diet foods are quite expensive and they would usually rather be able to feed the family than pamper theirselves. Shame; veggies and such should be less money if society really cares about peoples health.

Answer 4

I think it's because they don't feel the need to impress anyone anymore...when we're single and/or dating, we want to look our best because we want to attract the right person or keep the person we're currently dating interested. After the overall "puppy love" in a relationship has faded, then some people just stop trying because they've already attracted their mate.

Answer 5

It's not a question of "letting" -- sometimes, nature is just cruel :-). Childbirth and aging can take a toll, and sometimes, people are just too stressed with making a living and making ends meet to worry too much about their "looks." When you are married, and especially if you have kids, sometimes you can find a better use for $100 than on makeup.

Answer 6

I don't think it happens because someone allows it. When your single you have less expenses then when you are married. It takes money to have your hair colored, nails done, tan, nice clothes etc. When you go from being single to married with children you put your family first and sometime you need to compromise where you don't get your nails done and buy something the baby needs instead.

Sad enough you can not live on 1 income.

Answer 7

The feeling of security. You don't feel like you need to be on the top of your game. You found what you wanted and got it, why continue to put all that effort into it. It's not right, but that's what most people do. You take your partner for granted and assume that they are there. They will accept you if you let yourself go.

Answer 8

Because you get so wrapped up in getting kids ready for school, after school activities, homework, community things that you have volunteered and don't forget trying to be active in the church. Unfortunately, as you grow you take on so many responsibilities that keeping yourself up becomes less and less of a priority.

Answer 9

There are a lot of reasons for that, but in a nutshell it's just that other things in life become more important than keeping yourself all dolled up like you're looking for a mate.

Answer 10

Some people feel, why keep paying the note when the car is paid for.

Sorry for the reference to cars (I'm a mechanic), but making yourself look good takes work (exercise), so some people may think I don't need it any more since I got my spouse.

I don't want to worry anybody, but you may have to keep doing the work to keep your spouse.