Do I Have to Allow Him to Ejaculate in Me?

Question

The thing is that we are both 20 and in college, and I feel that we cannot afford children at the moment. I am curious to know if it is mandatory that I allow him to do that. We are married, but I am just scared to death of an "accident." Are my fears irrational? Is this normal? Do most married couples allow that or am I being abnormal?

does he really have a reason to be angry or offended by my decision, and what can we do to solve this issue?

the problem is that he does not want to use a condom and then my family has a high risk of stroke, heart attack, and therefore it would be risky for me to take bc.

Answer 1

Dont let him ejaculate in you without a condom until you are ready to have kids. Talk to your hubby about this and tell him how you feel. Think of the consequences also.

Answer 2

At your age you should know what birth control is. Get on the pill, and then you don't have to worry about it. Just make sure you take your pill at the same time every day. If you want a little more protection, get a diaphragm and use spermicide. Those little accidents can happen when the only thing you are doing to prevent it is pulling out.
But I can understand why he would be upset. Once you get married, you don't have to be worried about STD's, and should be able to be open and free sexually with the person you are married too.
But no you don't have to let him, but I am sure he isn't enjoying sex with you as much as he should, if he has to concentrate on pulling out at the right time.

Answer 3

Have you not heard of birth control? There are a lot of options available today including the pill, condoms, IUD's and on and on.
Take your choice or use a combination if you really want to be sure. But you should allow him to ejaculate inside of you. That is the completion of the act and far more gratifying and satisfying than the old pull out and hand job.
If you love him you will figure it out and take the necessary precautions, then go for it all.

Answer 4

Well, if you are relying only on the withdrawal method as a form of birth control then that alone will not prevent pregnancy. You really should know better than that. Any pre-ejaculation fluid can impregnate you. Why don't you look for another method of birth control (like the pill, patch, etc.)

And, nothing is "mandatory." You and only you have control over your body. Don't forget that.

Answer 5

OK! First, regardless of married or not it is your body and nobody has the right to your to tell you anything or get angry. Your decision is completely understandable. You have your whole life ahead of you, and just imagine going to school working and having a baby, it is possible but very hard. Help him understand that. Also there is always birthcontrol, and there are many forms, a shot, patch, pill, condoms, foams, and even better an IUD... that way there is no hassel he never has to really know unless he wants a baby right now, and it last up to 5 years. Your young enjoy it, because babies are wonderful, but they are forever! I hope this was helpful.

Answer 6

You aren't irrational. And it's pretty sick of him to want to do that all the time. He should really pull out when he has to do his duty.

YOU MUST HAVE SOME KIND OF BIRTH CONTROL! If you don't have any form of birth control, it is definitely like you're playing with fire. "If you keep going to the barber shop, you are bound to get a haircut." Go with condoms. Not only is it 98% protection of getting pregnant, but once he "comes" it will be in the condom.

If not a condom, go on the pill.

If he's not willing to compromise, I highly suggest finding a new guy. Would you want to have children with someone who won't listen to you or take your into consideration. Stand up for yourself. You deserve it.

Your request is not irrational! Whether you're married or not. Plus you can just finish him off with other "types" of stimulation.

(BTW - There's something called "pre-ejaculation". It's fluid that comes out of the guy before climax. It's 90% more potent than the climax sperm. This is where most woman get pregnant in the first place. Pulling out before climax isn't good enough).

(2nd BTW - Go get a sex education book! I you're over 20. You should know this by now. Not trying to make you feel bad, but I cannot urge you enough.)

Answer 7

If he loves U enough he wouldn't put that kinda pressure on u.
Go down the family planning clinic or see ur doctor and go on the pill or ejection,
This way u should be a bit safer, and whats wrong with him wearing a wet suite...
Don't take this the wrong way but i feel that he just being selfish,
as he ain't the one who gotta carry the baby 4, 9months.

Hope things work out alot better

Merry Christmas n best wishes Michaelx

Answer 8

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Condom#In_preventing_pregnancy
The typical use pregnancy rate among condom users varies depending on the population being studied, ranging from 10–18% per year.[32] The perfect use pregnancy rate of condoms is 2% per year.[3] Condoms may be combined with other forms of contraception (such as spermicide) for greater protection.[18]

Several factors account for typical use effectiveness being lower than perfect use effectiveness:

http://www.peelregion.ca/health/hsexual/htmfiles/bcwdrawl.htm#3
How well does it work in preventing pregnancy?


* IF
* before penetration a man who has recently ejaculated urinates to get rid of any left over sperm.
* the tip of the penis is wiped dry of lubricating fluid before penetration
* the penis IS withdrawn BEFORE ejaculation
* ejaculation occurs outside the vagina and well away from the vaginal opening
* THEN
* withdrawal has an approximately 80-90% effectiveness rate, or better.
* BUT
* control is difficult. This last minute method is risky. It offers NO protection from sexually transmitted infections, including HIV; even the pre-ejaculate fluid can contain infection along with sperm

Answer 9

If you are married and that much sensible enough to have sex then you should know the pros and cons also. You both should go for sex education. If you dont want to get pregnant then you should go fo birth control pills they are effective and safe if taken under doctors advice. Condoms is the another option that your guy can go for. You both shouldnt act immaturedly when it comes to start a family, do it when you guys are financially sound.

Answer 10

The easy part is get some birth control then he can and you won't have a baby.

The harder part is why is this his decision. This is a big issue and you two need to learn to communicate on these types of issues.....he should not be bullying you or bossing you, or ignoring your feelings and wishes. All the more reason to be on birth control cause if this stuff does not get fixed you are going to be divorced.

Answer 11

Haven't you heard of the condom or the pill? By not using at least one of these...you are really taking chances....When you are having sex without any protection...you have better be prepared to be a parent...You don't have to allow him to do anything if you don't want him to...but I find it rather difficult to stop him from ejaculating inside you once he is over the top..if you know what I mean....

I also agree with the lady below me...It makes me cringe when someone refers to an unplanned pregnancy as an "accident"....I think of them as "surprises" as well...
I just couldn't imagine telling a child they were an "accident"...because an accident is something you would prefer not to happen....