*****
Softness
Whispered words melt,
passing by, the thoughts
inside tumble
as you smile
Strands of hair part
as ears strains
to listen
Softly passing by,
they fall to your toes,
scattered, whispered words.
*****
Warrior’s lament
I hear tomtom calling
Dark forest echoes
I feel drums beating through tall grass
On crest a signal fire
Warns great danger
Ride away to spirits pointing
I see a totem gesture
Signs pathways ending
I hear Grandfathers
From herds up in the sky
*****
Wendy
What are you looking for
little gray squirrel
How many nuts
can there be
in Chicago
*****
2007-12-05 06:55:27 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
Yes C...these a re-runs, mostly. Since I got suspendered, I've been reposting them. Look, I've got a whole new bunch of fans. They haven't seen my dark side, yet...
2007-12-05 09:58:34 · update #1
in my humble opinion the first one is very "sweetly" written.complements your talents.
take care,
D.
2007-12-05 09:14:03 · answer #1 · answered by dorian 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Haven't I read the first two already? Use the word "softness" and I melt. It is melancholy, I love it. Great rhythm in the second one.
Now where's our squirrel?
EDIT: Holly-Joy..., were there actually days when you did not read poems by TD??? I must have been away.
:)
2007-12-05 17:41:33 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Annabella-VInylist 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
yes, a good try.
I like the first one with deep meaning and lot to interpret.
But i would suggest to change "toe" to 'ground" because then the poem becomes immortal. the words and its meaning still remain to be understood on the ground even after that person has left.
2007-12-05 15:04:01 · answer #3 · answered by Believer 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Here's what I'm looking for
big old man
At least as many nuts
here in Chicago
as there in New York
2007-12-05 17:24:52 · answer #4 · answered by Elaine P...is for Poetry 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I like all of your poems, and was disappointed the days when I did not get to read any. You are such a creative writer, and the large variety in styles you use never ceases to amaze me. :)
2007-12-05 15:01:36 · answer #5 · answered by Holiday Magic 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, I love your poems! All three. Such diversity between them and yet they are all so imaginative and enchanting. I would be hard pressed to pick a favorite.
2007-12-05 15:04:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
You do have the beat. Again, usual for an old white dude.
2007-12-05 17:35:26 · answer #7 · answered by Ha'ole Boy! 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I sure as hell am not here for the fried chicken, now am I?
2007-12-05 14:58:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
yes, i like them very much
2007-12-05 15:08:22 · answer #9 · answered by Analyst 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
i like wendy it was funny but good
2007-12-05 15:08:56 · answer #10 · answered by dollface66 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋