I am 29 weeks pregnant. 2 months after I found out I was pregnant, it seems like everyone else I know got pregnant too. I was really excited when I found out I was pregnant because it was not an easy thing to accomplish(it took 4 years). So , anyways 2 months after my husbands cousin called and said she was pregnant. I was happy for. I just knew that nothing was more important to me than my pregnancy. 2 weeks after that, one of my friends found out she was pregnant and didn't come to my baby shower because she said she should be worrying about herslef instead of someone elses pregnancy. How does pregnancy prevent you from going to someone elses baby shower? Anyways, the thing that really pisses me off is that my husband and I had our names picked out from before we actually got pregnant. When we found out it was a boy, it was already planned that we are going to name him Christian Antonio. On Sunday, his cousin told us that they too were going to name their son Christian. I am pissed.
2007-12-05 04:06:24 · 43 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Do you think that I have a right to be angry because it seems like I can't have anything to myself? I was fine with not being able to be the only one pregnant but come on, aren't I entitled to name my son something that nobody else in the family can name theirs? Wouldn't you be mad?
2007-12-05 04:08:08 · update #1
To the people who answered I am selfish because I am not the only pregnant one and some will be named Christian. I do not care about other women being pregnant, I care about the fact that I chose the name first, I was pregnant before her and she is my husbands cousin. I do not think that there should be two babies born into a family back to back that have the same name.
2007-12-05 04:34:40 · update #2
The day we found out it was a boy we told everyone what we were going to name him. She found out the sex of her baby 2 months after me and already knew what we were going to name our son. Christian is not a family name and Antonio is my husbands middle name so there is no reason for her to want to name her son Christian for that reason. I don't care what anyone says, that is the name we decided on and that is what his name will be. She is the one that is going to have to explain to her son why she named him Christian just like his cousin.
2007-12-05 04:40:23 · update #3
Honestly I would be so mad! Taking someones name is like the one thing you do not do! Ever. I would feel like they were trying to steal my thunder... that is so mean. And to not go to your baby shower because she needs to worry about her pregnancy?! I had I think 3 other pregnant women at my baby shower... that's just rude I think. So, yes, I think you do have a right to be mad!!
2007-12-05 04:15:51 · answer #1 · answered by Official Bethy 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I think a person always has a right to her feelings. You can't tell someone that they are wrong to be upset, because feelings are facts. Saying that a feeling is wrong is like telling the sky that it's wrong to send down rain.
With that said, I can understand why you'd be upset with your friend. She does seem rather selfish. Maybe she's worried that you'll hog the spotlight. I think you are right to feel irritated, so I would just cool the friendship. Give her the space she is asking for. Life is too short to have bad friends, especially at what should be a happy time in your life.
As for your cousin's baby, why can't you just use your original name? It's not uncommon to have two children with the same name in the same family. One of my little cousins shares my name, but we aren't in the same generation, so it's not as much of a problem. But you can still stick to your plan and just make some compromises. For instance, you could call him Christian and add your last initial, or call him Chris. I wouldn't change my plans just because of someone else. However, maybe next time you have a baby, you should announce the name ahead of time before someone else "takes" it.
2007-12-05 04:43:02 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Now naming a child can lead to major problems. I remember when my daughter was born, she had 3 names. One picked by us, one by my mom and one by my mom-in-law. And for 6 months it remained like this. But I didnot stop anyone and registered her name in her birth certificate what we chose. In your case, your agony is right but then there are 100,000 Christian Antonio. So go ahead with it. Sometimes people just enjoy irking you so she may not name her child the same because the way you r thinking, everyone wants a unique name for their child (atleast in the family).
About the fact that she didnot come for baby showering....hmmm....I would say some people are more inconsiderate than others so you can neglect it and avoid calling her and call some of your friend or so. Then she will know that you can do things without her as well. The idea is not to show her 'down' but that you can do on your own and if she volunteer her services then welcome her. remember we are not breaking relationships here!
2007-12-05 04:15:44 · answer #3 · answered by Titubeta 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ouch, I would be mad at first but look at it this way... The two boys will grow up together LOVING the fact that they have the same name. They will hang out and be known as the Christian cousins. Just trying to look at the brighter side. Don't be bitter while your pregnant. Let the meaningless stuff go. I just suffered a miscarriage... and while I was pregnant I argued over the stupidest things. Now all I wonder is if the baby would have been a boy or girl. Just something to think about.
2007-12-05 04:13:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok, you have to remember first that you are pregnant and that as such you are very prone to be emotional....there is nothing wrong with you feeling cheated by your husbands cousin. However to be so upset to be mad at them or to choose a different name or to make them choose a different name is silly and would hurt thier feelings too. Try to remember that there are thousands of children with the name Christian and that his cousin may not have known that you had already picked that name as was excited that the boys will have the same name. You have a right to feel how you do but don't make it into a huge family drama over something so minor in the scheme of life, love and families beginning.
Momma_Bear
2007-12-05 04:14:59 · answer #5 · answered by the_morris_bears 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No, your hormones are making you upset right now.
It is normal to see many people get pregnant at certain times of the year, usually due to cold weather and the associated bed snuggling to help you keep warm ;)
Anyway, your friend not coming to your shower was very thoughtful, the day is about you, not other people surrounding her with her pregnancy.
As for the name, if your son is born first then the pressure to change the name will be on the other person who will also be going through mood swings very shortly. You Will probably find they are going to change their name after realizing you will be first.
BTW, don't get too attached to that name. With both of my daughters we had already picked out their names. Once they were born we saw totally different names for them, almost like they picked out their own names.
2007-12-05 04:12:10 · answer #6 · answered by cobra2140 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
First of all, congratulations!!! Yes, I probably would be disappointed to learn that someone else in the family is naming their son the same, but hey, maybe take it as a compliment too. Now that being said, get over the "being pissed" part and put your energy into good use. You are going to have a baby! What a wonderful wonderful gift you are receiving! I am so happy for you! Enjoy your life whilst you can, when you have a child, you have a responsibility to that child, for the rest of your lifetime. Get rest, I mean, get lots of sleep!!!
God bless,
CathyH
2007-12-05 04:13:47 · answer #7 · answered by Cathy H 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can see where you might be irritated over the fact that she picked out the same name you did. My mom had the same problem when she was pregnant with me (my Aunt stole my intended name for my cousin who was born 3 weeks after I was). You can still name your baby Christian. If it really bothers you then you should either talk to her about how you feel and ask her to consider another name or you could always reconsider your name choice if she won't budge.
2007-12-05 04:12:36 · answer #8 · answered by wildeyes_heart_of_stone 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Who now a days has a name to their self? When the cousins get older they probably enjoy having the same name. Your pregnancy is your pregnancy. How could the joy of having your baby that you tried so long to have, be taking away by anybody or anything? Stop aggravating your self and your belly with petty things. Be happy enjoy your pregnancy and pray for a healthy baby!
2007-12-05 04:16:40 · answer #9 · answered by **kia** 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Christian is a very common name. I could see you being upset if you'd have selected some wildly unique and unusual name and someone took it but for such a common name I think you're going to just have to suck it up. You being so upset over someone having the same name is kind of silly since there are hundreds of thousands of christians all over the world. I personally know 3 boys and 2 girls named Christian as well. By your standards they have a right to be mad at you for stealing their names :-/ I'm not trying to be harsh but I'm pointing out a realistic standpoint on a very common name.
As for your friend with the attitude you're displaying on here "Dang it I'm pregnant, its my time to shine because it took me 4 years to get pregnant and no one else should be pregnant except me" your friend is probably just dishing out some of the same attitude back on you to make you realize that you're not being so nice yourself.
I understand that it took you 4 years to get pregnant but you need to realize its not fair to punish everyone else around you just because they got pregnant around the same time.
2007-12-05 04:30:45 · answer #10 · answered by Piparis 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋