Why not love your spouse and save the lawyer fees and goto a nice Thai restaurant instead ?
Why not buy your wife a massage and a spa holiday ?
Why are people so PATHETIC to get divorced ?
Please explain and stick together FOREVER !
Uphold your vows !
2007-12-03 20:35:43 · 26 answers · asked by Love life and share happiness 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Just My Opinion ...
While I completely agree people have long looked upon marriage as a "disposable" relationship, I also know there are times when divorce is the only answer.
Abuse - mental, emotional and physical (this includes sexual).
Or what if you are married to someone who continually has affairs? How many times do you forgive before you finally have enough pride in yourself to walk away and get the better life you deserve?
Suppose your marriage has pretty much ended? You no longer love each other and only ever fight. Not good for the kids (if there are any) to be seeing this on a daily basis.
SO - aside from what I mentioned above, and anything I may have missed, why do people just throw away their marriages? Because they are too damned lazy to fight for it! I have seen it many, many times in friends and relatives. It's too much work, it's too hard - divorce, it's easier. Who cares that the kids think it's their fault. Who cares that it was a minor misunderstanding that got blown out of proportion. Just get a divorce - or an annulment - and move on. Find a new spouse. And if you aren't happy, divorce and try again.
Sadly, that's what our "throw away" society has sunk to.
Granted, not all marriages/couples are like that. But far too many are.
Great question - thanks for asking.
2007-12-03 20:49:32 · answer #1 · answered by Lady Ariana 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
It is quite apparent that you are youg, naive, and have no clue about life, living, realtionships or marriage for that matter. You must be a complete idiot to even make that statement! But since your last statement is uphold your vows, I'll ask you this? What if your spouse has a cheating heart, has cheated on you 3 times that you know of, has already told you that she can't just have male friends. If they are male and her friend, chances are she has slept with them or how bout this. Her husband at the time (Me) had a vasectomy 4 years ago but she comes up pregnant and tells you that it is not yours. Now please tell me what vows was I supposed to uphold? I had upheld them for 12 years and then she tells me that out of the 12, she had been having an affair for 5 of those years then comes home with another man's child. I would like to see you uphold those "vows" in light of all this. How bout taking a lying cheating with out for some Thai food and a massage. She really deserves it you know. You would be pathetic too. And BTW, I divorced her cheatin ***. Guess what, she has been begging me to come back. A snowflake has a better chance of surviving on the sun than of me ever taking her back
2007-12-04 08:26:23 · answer #2 · answered by Dee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you shouldn't judge, before you know how most people have to live in their own homes, with a spouse that is abusive, unfaithful and unloving. Buying a person a massage after you have beaten her beyond recognition is PATHETIC. Cheating on her/ him and bringing home AIDS is PATHETIC, not talking, touching or appreciating your spouse, leaving them emotional empty is PATHETIC. It is not the same as the olden days, when you stuck it out no matter what. Now a days, it can cost you, your life. Talk to more people before you speak about something you don't know. I can see if you are talking about those people that all of a sudden, want out of their marriage because of a mid life crisis. Or because they have found someone else that turns them on. I think abuse and infidelity out weighs all of that. After having swollen lips, broken jaws,arms and legs. I don't think they will feel much like eating Thai food. Maybe soup through a straw.
2007-12-03 20:47:31 · answer #3 · answered by Go GO Ressa 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
How can you say that! I was married for 23 years to a man I loved. However he was unzipping his trousers for any woman who wanted it. When challenged he hit me. I stayed with him for the sake of the children, Until one day I woke up and realised that as a human being I am worth more than that. I divorced him for adultery and abuse. Once the divorce was final my sons asked me why I hadn't done it before. Children are very aware of what goes on within a marriage and I wish I had done it years ago, so my children could of had a stable unit with me and still see their father. No one should have to stay in a relationship like that. I kept my vows and stayed faithful but a marriage takes two people to make it work, one can not do it alone. I am now married to the most wonderful man, I know with all my heart that he would never hit me or cheat. He also loves and respects my children.
2007-12-03 22:08:11 · answer #4 · answered by Dory 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
I 100% agree with u .. though getting a divorce is sometimes a solution (when one of them is abusive or alcoholic or child melester ..etc )
but when it comes to other problems it's worth the wait and being together trying to fix things and being patient cuz that's what love and marriage is all about
People might say that im saying that becuz im living a beautiful marriage but im actually not .. my husband has so many bad things in his personality but leaving him is not what im thinking about .. im still trying and will keep trying and will not give up on him (oh and wish me luck with that lol )
it's just when there are silly problems spouses multiply the problem by 100000 and see a dark future and decide to leave .. they're not willing to be optimistic and fix it instead of complaining and telling the whole world about it and even worse .. tell their parents about it !!
i can go non stop about this topic .. i agree with u
2007-12-03 21:09:15 · answer #5 · answered by Maria 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
so sanctimonious
It would be easier to not marry in the first place.It would be easier to not commit. It would be easier to feel free to walk if you were unhappy. Marriage is hardwork sometimes. But it is STUPID and a waste of both your lives if 1 or both of you dont want to be there. Life too short to be in an unloving or harmful relationship.The decision to make a change is not an easy one,picking up the pieces and getting on with things takes a lot of guts.Sometimes love isnt enough.
2007-12-03 21:55:54 · answer #6 · answered by neneallfluff 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What would a thai restaurant do.What half hour eating a meal is going to solve everyones problems.So then they go home and cop a beating from the so called husband.YOu would have been divorced instantly if you were married to me.That is why people file for divorce when they marry a arrogant*******like you with a bad attitude .WE are not all idiots either.
2007-12-03 21:11:59 · answer #7 · answered by embellishment3 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Sometimes divorce is the only solution. My parents divorces after years of my father beating my mother beyond recognition. My first wife (who passed away so we didn't divorce) divorced her first two husbands after years of physical abuse.
Thankfully my first wife and I never raised a hand towards each other, and although we had our problems we worked thru them.
Just remember, sometimes people don't divorce for minor reasons, sometimes they have very real reasons for doing so.
No one should have to put up with ANY kind of abuse regardless.
2007-12-04 02:44:12 · answer #8 · answered by spear_1021 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
oh for god sake....so ya supposed to stay with somebody that uses you a punch bag when they feel crap and mentally abuses you. or cheats on you any amout of times..dont think so. would rather shove the vows somewhere personal and walk! why should you have to stay and put up with that cos somebody thinks that marriage is sacred......people need to get outta the dark ages.on this issue...but if it something petty then i agree talk about it and work it out
2007-12-03 20:56:36 · answer #9 · answered by womble 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A very narrow minded view.
People grow apart, marry too early, have emotional problems etc.
To assume a spa treatment will sort all ills makes me worry for your wife.
I'm happily married and hope I will remain so. Ill work at my marriage every day to try and make it so.
I wont however lay into people who arn't as lucky.
Neither should you.
2007-12-03 20:49:18 · answer #10 · answered by Telf 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋