in a marriage should each others wallets or purses automatically be off limits to the other?

Question

My spouse and i are discussing weather or not it is "proper" to have access to each others wallets or purses?

Answer 1

I think once you get married, in the most basic sense, there is no more mine and yours. If your willing to get married, there should be no more secrets, hiding etc. What are you guys afraid your gonna find in those items? If I need something, I go in my wifes purse and get it. If she needs something, she goes in my wallet and gets it. If I had something to hide, a purse or wallet would be the last place to put it.

Answer 2

Nothing is off limits in a marriage. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't have an expectation of privacy. I personally would not go through my wife's purse just to snoop, but if there was something in there I needed I would get it without asking her permission. I'd expect the same from her.

If you're married you should have no secrets at all, so there should be nothing in his wallet/your purse that you wouldn't want the other seeing.

Answer 3

The wife and I been married for what seems like for ever, it has all ways been I don't go in her purse (not that I could ever find anything in that black hole if I needed to) and she stays out of my wallet (not that where is any thing in it money included) it is just a respect thing.

Answer 4

I wouldn't really see anything wrong with that. I mean what if one of you passes out? Need to get to meds or something out of your purse and identification out of his wallet. So why shouldn't you be allowed to? I mean there is a big difference between going in there for emergencies and just picking it up off the dresser and taking that person's money out or something. Now that is really wrong. Kind of invading your partner's personal space. But yea if its something really dire, like what meds you are on or something, then you better believe, your spouse has a right to go through your purse.

Answer 5

I believe there should not be secrets in a marriage but i don't want anyone rum aging through my purse and cluttering up my already cluttered purse where I will not be able to find anything. And I dont want to be digging through his wallet.

Answer 6

I'm quite happy for my husband to look in my purse. I have nothing to hide and if he needs something out of he can get it. He's also never had a problem with me getting something out of his wallet.

Answer 7

Not proper no. A man should never go in a womans bag or purse and the same the other way round...asking is polite...if you have a joint bank account then thats the thing you share...but purses are private my husband would never go in mine...and I ask before I go in his.

Answer 8

i dont see why they should have to be. marriage is based on trust. when i find that person that i know i can trust, with anything and everything, the only thing that will be off limits is my anus. unless shes a compulsive gambler or something, than, im hiding my wallet and making sure she doesnt have my credit card #. i hope you two find the answer, because its an obvious one.

Answer 9

I never even thought about looking in my husband's wallet. I think that he may have told me to get money or something out of it once or twice.

He would not even try to look in my purse. If I asked him to get something out of it, he brought it to me and told me to do it.


I was never a nosy person, and I trusted him.

Answer 10

My wife and I have been married for almost a year, ... and we share a purse ... It takes a bit of management of finance, and a little accounting skills ... But we believe : "Whats fair for one is fair for the other"

We each get an allowance which we can spend as we want to, ...

And big decisions get made together ...