2007-12-03 20:27:11 · 12 answers · asked by jane d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the private domain thing is his private safe
2007-12-03 20:57:18 · update #1
It depends on how private and how much the rest of the domain is shared or excludes them. A marriage is a joining of two persons, it should not be the disolution of one of them (or both of them) into some siingle entity. Each should continue to grow and shift to new interests. Couple who negotiate whether both will take up every new interest (or worse, never take up new interests because the other one frowns on it) get duller and duller with time. Couples should have solo time and friends away from the other.
I have a workshop in what would otherwise be a garage and I don't think my wife has ever been in there (helped by her being a blind person and it being dangerously messy.) We share an office that I sit in now.
OTOH, I did some work for a woman who planned her new house for months - very large, very dramatic, $985,000 20 years ago. When it was built she held a marvelous housewarming for literally everyone involved in building the house from bricklayers to lawyers. It was wonderful - super kitchen, space for kids and nanny and maid. But as I toured it dawned on me that there was no space for her husband - the bedroom, closets, morning room, office - were all hers. When I asked, I found that "his" room was a sauna that could only be reached by walking outdoors along the wall facing the pool!
When they were divorced (she had the money) a few years later, she married a former sheriff and it was so obvious that there was no male space in the place that they got special zoning permission and busted through a livingroom wall to tuck a good sized office between the house and the side lot giving him a substantial and very masculinely decorated space.
2007-12-03 20:41:20 · answer #1 · answered by Mike1942f 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
once you have been joined together as a couple there is nothing like private domain, you are expected to operate as one, as in this are no longer to be private between both of you, if there is any reason whatsoever why one has to have a private domain then it has to be an agreement between you and your spouse.
2007-12-03 20:49:14 · answer #2 · answered by black&proud 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course if it is yours. LOL
If an agreed area is where they put certain things then yes I feel this is ok.
But if you are talking about a large area that is intended for all the family then certainly not.
We all need to learn to respect some space or area of others even if it is there bedroom/den. But for you not to be able to enter or go in and have everything in there so if you wanted to be able to see it.
No secrets see.
Men can be a little like cats they like to pee on their area so to speak so everyone knows NO ENTRY. Don't let this happen from the very start.
Good Luck J
2007-12-03 20:35:14 · answer #3 · answered by J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is normal. Marriage is a union, yes but this doesnt mean that all things will be in public domain. We all need a space to grow individually, you can't grow in your spouse's shadow. One of the most essential foundation in marriage is trust. Rest assured that what he keeps to himself is nothing like a bombshell that could destroy the bond of love. Allow your spouse to move in his own pace. Never coerced him to tell you what he keeps from you give him time and when that arrives be open.
Take it easy...
2007-12-03 21:23:15 · answer #4 · answered by Snowy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
each physique has secrets and strategies. My husband has no concept how a lot of human beings I had intercourse with in the previous I met him (he did not desire to understand and its under 10), that i in my view do not in user-friendly terms like the scent of his deodorant even nonetheless he thinks its impressive, and he did not understand I had a sister i could never met because of the fact there truly wasn't a ingredient to telling him approximately somebody that has 0 involvement in my existence. That being suggested, i've got not stored any secrets and strategies regarding our funds, our daughter, his family contributors.....any of the multiple significant issues.
2016-10-02 06:21:43 · answer #5 · answered by kanosh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only if he's using it to sell products to buy you a lovely gift! Other than that no way is that healthy. it's the 2007 version of how gramps used to keep a box of hustlers in the garage to hide from gramma.
2007-12-03 20:31:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
are you asking keep a private e-mail that the spouse doesn't know about.. not sure it is healthy but, I think it is normal... I have one and I know a friend who does... for us its where we can vent... give eachother advise.
2007-12-03 20:33:31 · answer #7 · answered by sassy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, of course. I have a private side that my man respects, and he has his private side that I respect. Nothing wrong with this.
2007-12-03 20:41:20 · answer #8 · answered by Orla C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it is normal and healthy.
The important thing is to respect each other.
Show respect for the private space !
Stick together and be HAPPY !
2007-12-03 20:37:15 · answer #9 · answered by Love life and share happiness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
On the computer or a seperate area in which he lives and you don't? Not sure what u are asking.
2007-12-03 20:31:32 · answer #10 · answered by Nicole 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋