When you lose trust in your husband and lose faith/security/love - can you ever get it back. I try, but I always seem to hold on to the thoughts of him lying, etc.... Have you ever got the trust/love back and how did you do it?
2007-12-03 08:22:49 · 12 answers · asked by lilwoman 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
honestly i couldn't. I did try , but it was those "thoughts" that I couldn't take.
2007-12-03 08:57:29 · answer #1 · answered by Who Knew? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you make a conscious decision to take someone back after any kind of infidelity you have to be willing to forgive and move forward. Not necessarily forget, but forgive. Meaning you accept that a wrong was done, and are willing to move forward together. You have to learn to stop holding on to what happened. If you are doing that, then you are not ready to forgive. Maybe you need some time before you can do this. Really, time and communication are the only ways to get passed the loss of trust. Best of luck to you!
2007-12-03 09:44:06 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes I did. But it takes lots of help, focus, patiences and committment. If you think is worth fighting for then anything is possible. The way I did it was by changing a few things around. First I read this book titled "The Divorce Remedy" by Michele Weiner Davis. The book gave me some very important tools that helped me regain trust. It is not just about you, but that's where you need to start, with you! After you work on some inner personal stuff, then you will be able to deal with your partner. For now you need to focus on yourself and a good way to start is by reading that book. Good luck and never gve up hope,,,
2007-12-03 08:34:43 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was married for 26 years and didnt know til the end of it that he had 6 relationships with other woman.He to lied through his teeth.I trusted him to.Was devastated when he finely left me for the barmaid where he worked.But there is a silver lining.2 months after that i found a lovely man and im still with him today.I know how very hard and frustating it can be to find peace with ourselves again and trust sumone else.In time yu will heal and yu will hav a wonderful life with someone else if yu want that.But if want to try to find happiness on yr own first that would be wise.Im just lucky that i found sumone so soon to carry through all the pain and help me believe in myself again.Yu will learn to love and trust again and it will be better than the first.good luck.xxxxx
2007-12-03 08:47:27 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to find a way to release your frustrations whether it be with talking to someone or writing it down. Talking it out with your husband is the best way to relieve the pain but if your husband is anything like mine is, he makes me feel bad when ever i would bring it up. 10 Years ago my husband cheated on me for well over 3 years that's alot of lying and sneaking around on his part. When i fount out about it i felt like i was losing my mind i was in like a twilight zone.
Trying to get through it on your own is very hard the only thing i had was my little tape recorder. Everything i was feeling and wanted to say i would say it to the tape recorder. If i felt the anger coming on i would lock myself in the bath room and yell into the recorder like it was my husband. I think i called him every name i could think of and as far as the other woman i did the same to her. If i wasn't talking i was writing. I don't know if it would help you all i can say is that's how i got through it.
As far as getting back the trust, love and feeling safe with him, that's gone never to return. I love my husband but i don't respect him i don't look up to him like i once did. I think he will do it again and i spy on him ever chance i get. Not one day has gone by that i haven't thought about what he did. If it sounds like i am unhappy it's because I'm not happy. I guess i'm just waiting to wake up one day and be happy like i once was.
2007-12-03 10:38:03 · answer #5 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it's hard. trust me... i've been with my gf for 3 years. the 1st yr she lied, the 2nd she lied again - I'm still with her for the sake of my son - we get along fine but I always have my guard up and i don't think I will ever let it down... It's just something they have to deal with and yourself as well... It's a choice you make and have to live with... Basically - it's your choice on whether or not you think things will get better or maybe give it some time and see how things will go a year or two from now... Personally - time hasn't healed for me and I'm not sure if it ever will.
2007-12-03 08:30:29 · answer #6 · answered by Me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may never be able to trust him, you may never feel that secure, and he may even possibly keep on lying; then its totally YOUR decision on what YOU should do! Don't let us amatures out here tell you what to do. Do what your head and heart say then if it all turns to custard its only yourself to blame. Good Luck!
2007-12-03 08:42:12 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i trusted in the beginning but once i knew he lied to me a couple of times that took it away. i have a hard time trusting anyone. people are either trustworthy are they aren't once someone shows me they aren't then that's the way i take them
2007-12-03 14:07:51 · answer #8 · answered by jeannieboop 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to let your frustrations out and voice out how you feel inside don't sugar coat it it he is a man enough he will handle his business and help you deal with it but you will never forget it. if these things is hard for you to do you might need to consider counseling and prayers God heals the wounds of the heart
2007-12-03 08:30:28 · answer #9 · answered by MEETOO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you already tried using Pull Your Ex Back program? Proceed to this site : http://www.ExRecoveryFormula.com/ . Possibly this could immediately manage one and all!
2014-08-18 06:49:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋