2007-12-03 07:23:52 · 18 answers · asked by Brilliant Queen (BQ)_forever !!! 5 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
de@r be@uTy,
Forgiving is so hard because we humans feel and think that we have all the right to hurt people feelings, insult them and make them feel bad in each or the other way. But we people feel that we don't have any right to forgive.
We will never forgive people. But why the hell????When we have the full right to hurt people and get hurt by people then why don't we forgive.
And we people also think that by forgiving someone or by apologizing or by saying sorry to someone, we will become small and the other person will become big. But its not like that. In fact the person who forgives is much more big then the other person.
No one needs or acquire any quality to forgive people. It's just we ourselves who have to understand that by forgiving people we will not become weak or small. We should not allow our ego to come between this because ego is such a disease which just only destroy and ruin relations....that's it...tc...sweet dreamz...bye...
*****bE kOoL...bUt dOn frEeZe....*****.
2007-12-05 05:03:31 · answer #1 · answered by $@LLu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forgiving is hard b/c in a sense you have to forget what upset or hurt you & most of the time it is impossible (or very hard) to forget something that someone did or something that happened. I've always thought that in order to truly forgive you have to be able to get over whatever has been done against you & not let it bother you...no matter how bad. In essence be at peace w/what happened. That way even when it is thought about or brought up it doesn't bother you anymore. Or at least doesn't affect you to the point of reaction. That's why you hear a lot of therapist on tv (and elsewhere) say that when someone has been abused or hurt they have to forgive the abuser for not knowing any better (or someting to that effect). b/c it only eats "you" up inside to hold onto something, while they move on w/there lives. they may never understand or even know why what they did upset you but you do it so that you can move on, not them.
2007-12-03 07:43:27 · answer #2 · answered by Ms. Independent 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It'll take time, it's a process that you must go through. Remember the act of forgiveness is for your benefit, not necessarily the other persons. Although mending a relationship is a good goal to have, it's not always possible. And no one should expect you to forget. That is unproductive to the forgiveness process; it's like telling you to stuff your emotions deep inside of you and never express them. Humans just don't work that way. It's not healthy. When you've processed your pain and emotional injury heals, forgiveness will come easily. If you forget, great. If you don't, great. You can't control that.
2016-04-07 06:08:53 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to forgive others when you have been through painful things time and time again. If one has been through times where one could not even trust their own family to help one, and had to keep on and on through long workdays or nights or whatever you had to do to "make it" supporting oneself or whatever, and with each new friend you let in a little, they screw you even more- the cycle gets vicious. Just have a lot of patience with the person, and if they have done something unforgiveable or that you cannot live with, exclude them from your life completely until they can "act right." A peaceful environment where I was allowed to do as I chose, and was not criticized for the nasty things I have done helped me to forgive others, and myself also.
2007-12-03 07:45:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
"An eye for an eye, makes the whole world blind"
said our Mahatma Gandhi, the liberator of India by non-violence!
Right from day one of human creation, of all the unnatural death of hundreds of millions of people the killing of man by man was the greatest than any other kind of human loss including all the natural calamities like earthquake,flood,fire etc!
To set things right we have found and accepted the noblest and the divine quality of human, is to FORGIVE the offender to give a chance to repent on what he did! Only the human has this quality and to qualify for this, it is needless to say that one has to have the maturity and a great heart to be a FORGIVER!
We have seen how people have reformed in life, once forgiven for the sin committed! Added, forgiviness equals an act of God, who forgives all of us for our sins!
2007-12-03 08:00:35 · answer #5 · answered by anjana 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When someone does something wrong to us, generally, the first thought we have is: "You owe me, you hurt me..."
However, whenever we hold on to the past, it effects today and the future.
Forgiving someone releases them from the debt of "you owe me..." but here's the real release. The benefit of forgiving isn't for the person you forgive. It is for yourself. When we hold on to that baggage, it starts getting heavy and it begins to weigh us down.
Forgiving someone does not mean that you put yourself back into the situation to be hurt or used again. It means you forgive them and move on.
Unforgiveness turns into bitterness.
I don't think you'll ever forget what happened but you can move away from the memory.
It's like when you walk out the door and forget your purse or wallet. You didn't forget you have a purse or wallet, you only forgot to grab it.
2007-12-03 07:44:16 · answer #6 · answered by Salvation is a gift, Eph 2:8-9 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
We need to reduce our ego.
We think we had to forgive someone, actually who knows the situation might you to forgive.
There is nothing wrong in asking for forgiveness as long as we know that it was our fault.
More than we forgiving others, we should make sure that others forgive us for our sins.
Let god forgive us before we forgive others. Who are we to forgive others.
2007-12-04 16:09:05 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
We all need to realize that no one is perfect and we all mistakes. Sometimes we hurt people without realizing it. Also, remember that not forgiving only hurts you. Most people don't dwell on it after they have hurt someone. They move on. You should forgive and move on and not allow that person to keep hurting you. You will feel so much better when you are not filled with anger and resentment.
2007-12-03 07:30:12 · answer #8 · answered by Christine M 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
We need to have self-control and we should learn to control our emotions. We should have both sympathy and empathy for others. We should try to place ourselves in their position and then we will realise that they deserve to be forgiven straightway. Everyone does mistakes.. me..you.. just everyone... We should give a chance for others to realise their mistakes. Then you will know that forgiving is not so hard.
2007-12-03 09:00:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if they said sorry then just close ur eyes n say i forgive u , bad advice but its not that hard to forgive someone just remember how hard it took that someone to say sorry
"Sorry is a hard word" think of that ........forgiving is the easy part
2007-12-03 16:04:10 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋