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and starting my diploma of make up in jan. one part of me wants to have an abortion because everything will be set back again for atleast another year and i feel like im just getting back to normal after having pre eclampsia in my first pregnancy. on the other hand i love being a mum, its the best feeling in the world and the thought of having an abortion already makes me feel so guilty. i dont know what to do. im so confused. one day i want it and the next i dont. im really scared im going to make the wrong decision.
and please, i dont want people giving me there negative comments. i am very aware that i didnt use contraception and i should have and i also know that it has led to another pregnancy.

2007-12-02 23:38:56 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting Pregnancy

thanks...but in my question i didnt say "please everyone make me feel bad for being human"

2007-12-02 23:53:25 · update #1

can people please stop calling me a murderer. it quite annoying and hurtful. i have never had an abortion and not sure if i will ever have one.

2007-12-03 00:41:34 · update #2

10 answers

well i wasn't going to answer this as i think only you can make the decision as it is your life and your baby. but then i saw how harsh people were and felt you needed a break! i think you just need to deal with your confusion and look at the different options without being judged. you are in a very tricky situation, whichever decision you make will be hard. Of course you don't want to have an abortion, nobody does. There will be a gap of just 13 or 14 months between the two if you have one. At first it will be hard, but in the long run, it will be great to have them close together. I think if i were you i would try and look on the postiive side of having two kids so close together, you will get it all 'out of the way' quickly, which is easier than if you have them too far apart. do you think if you have an abortion you can live with that decision? i can imagine it would be hard if you had a child already and to look at them and always be thinking 'I could have had another one a year younger'. if you do want more than one child, then it is in some ways easier to do it this way and then you will have more time in the future to do your course and so on. If your course starts in january, maybe you can still do some of it as you will only be a few months pregnant, and then continue it later. anyway, you have a big decision to make and it is only you who has to live with it, so i hope it is right for you. good luck :)

2007-12-03 00:05:24 · answer #1 · answered by uenuku 5 · 2 0

I know what your are going thru, I'm currently 8mo pregnant and have a 11 mo old. There due dates are 1 day apart. My 11 mo old was due 1/20/07, but came early on 1/04/07. this new baby is due 1/19/08. I know what I'm not doing next April!
I thought the same things you did at first. The good news is that you are undecided, which leads me to believe that you really don't want to abort. Please don't worry, things will work themselves out..I think that the hormones are whats making you so confused. Talk to your hubby/boyfriend, be 100% on what you want to do before you make any desions. If being a mommy makes you so happy, and is the best thing in the world, then think of it this way...Now your Twice as blessed! Good luck to you! I'll be thinking about you!

edit: Seems like mybluety, lifesabeach and Bob w are the same people to me....Look at their questions, all of their best answers at from each other. If I'm wrong, then sorry! But if I'm right...GET A LIFE! We are supposed to be here to help each other not call them names. GROW UP ALREADY.

2007-12-03 00:21:12 · answer #2 · answered by smk7472 3 · 0 0

i know how you feel because i have a 13 month old, and am 7 months pregnant. My first was 6 months when i got pregnant. it will be hard but you will get through it! i didnt want this baby at first, and actually caught myself wishing for a miscarriage, but im so happy that i'm having this baby now. even though he might have messed up my plans, its not his fault. he didnt ask for that! u know? it will get better! and on top of that ...im doing this alone! but i know God put this baby here for a purpose and who am I to go against God? He will find a way to work this out for me, and for you too! Just think of how much you love your first baby....I didnt think it was possible to love anyone that much, but i love this baby just the same. Just give it time. I know you're still in shock over it, but you will be excited about this baby too!

and ps: to the people criticizing her for this question ... HOW DARE YOU ....post such an idiotic answer. HOW DARE YOU judge her for something you havent went thru. U think thats helping ??? Noooo, so stop.
oh and hun it might help to look up some information on how they do abortions. my friend had a really horrible experience with hers, and i dont want that for you. its already a hard decision, you dont need all those complications after

2007-12-02 23:46:10 · answer #3 · answered by Jada and Ty's mommy 3 · 2 0

I think you should do whatever you think is best. I've had abortions in the past, and I regret it every single day. I'm currently 39 weeks pregnant and am so happy that I'm having this baby. My husband and I weren't planning on having children, and I'm still trying to complete school to get my degree in Education.

As much as it's hard getting back to your normal life, I think it'd be harder living with yourself after the abortion.

But in the end, the decision is up to you.

I just would like to say, I definitely regretted after my abortions and probably will til the day I die.


Also, don't mind the people who are so hostile on this forum. It's because 80% of the people reading in the Pregnancy section are Pro-Life, 15% don't know how to read questions correctly, and 5% are just anal from not having sex during pregnancy (as if the ones posting the questions aren't annoyed themselves). Pregnancy's hard enough without OTHER pregnant people judging us right? =)

Good Luck!

2007-12-02 23:59:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 3 1

Hi AJi. Your condition is not uncommon among mothers. I have seen situations where a nursing mother took in just after 4 months of delivery, and she made the choice of carrying the pregnancy through. Also there are cases where a nursing mother in such situation opted for abortion. i tell you this thing happens all the time.
Now what matters here is your decision. Whichever choice you feel is the best,take it. You just have to weigh options like:
1. is my body ready to carry through another pregnancy after 5 months of giving birth?
2. can I be able to scale through my academics with another pregnancy and baby?
3. Can I deal with the after-guilty feeling of abortion
4. Will my decision affect my 5month old daughter?
I have to tell you on a personal note; Abortion is always easy to consider, but after the deed, the guilt will remain with you for the rest of your life. I speak from experience. So i suggest you carry through your pregnancy. You can put your academics on hold. After having your baby you can go back to it. A man is never too old to go to school.

2007-12-03 01:15:47 · answer #5 · answered by princess Ess 1 · 1 0

I just don't see how anyone could have an abortion after having a baby. Thats your baby in there, just like the one you gave birth to. You're pregnant for a reason, babies are a blessing!

2007-12-02 23:46:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2 0

it really does not matter what anybody thinks,,,,, we can all offer advise, but in the end , it's all up to you,, i hate to see anybody go through with abortion,,,,seeing as their are so many couples who want children and cannot have any, and i know it is hard giving up a part of you,,but i would rather a part of me , be out there somewhere,,rather than not have the chance to be out there at all. and yes, if you decide in keeping the baby , it will be hard, but I'm sure you will be able to handle it,,what ever you deside to do,,make sure it feels good,,, in your HEART

2007-12-03 00:07:19 · answer #7 · answered by mytic0420 3 · 1 0

Don't abort. I know its not going to easy but then thats life. Even if you have the strongest of logic and reason for doing it, its never gonna make you feel good. Whole of your life you will think of the baby you've killed. Better to be set back for a year than to be guilty for life...................go ahead and have the baby.

2007-12-02 23:56:18 · answer #8 · answered by just pregnant 1 · 0 1

FYI - after you give birth - you are VERY fertile for the next 90 days

looks like you did even better

2007-12-02 23:48:32 · answer #9 · answered by tom4bucs 7 · 0 3

Well i dont want to sound rude but if you wernt smart enough to have your friend wear a condom i dont think your unborn child should have to suffer for it. You knew what could happen and your unborn child should not have to pay for your mistakes

2007-12-02 23:46:50 · answer #10 · answered by mommy 4 · 2 2

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