convincing my gf to not have a abortion?

Question

my girlfreind is 17 and pregnant im 19. i been with her for 1 year. how do i convince my girlfreind to not have abortion? i dont know what else i can do. i have told her she will live with guilt, depressions, and the what ifs forever etc. ive also told her the medical effects she could have on having an abortion. all she tells me is leave me alone, ill deal with this or you should be there for me, dont worry about etc.. of course shes going to act like this shes 17 but what can i do? i understand its her body her choice by law or whatver. which is completley unfair..yeah its inside her but half of that life is mine too. i need some help, any at all would be great.

and please if your going to say something rude, i could careless to here it and you should find something better to do with your life.

Answer 1

You've told her how you feel. Now it's up to her. As much as you don't want to hear it, it IS her body, her choice. Be supportive.

Answer 2

First off, you don't have to tell her what abortion does to the baby. It doesn't matter really. The baby dies, end of story.

Now on to my point, I've had a couple of friends that have had abortions; some with the support of the father some without. Ultimately, it IS her choice, no matter what we tell you. It must be very scary for her to know that if she has this child, her whole life will change (not to mention her body!). Truth be told though, there aren't any real lasting physical injuries from abortion. I can't stress enough how wonderful it is that you're willing to step up to the plate. I have to ask, though, have you thought about the impact a baby would have on your life? I mean, really just sat there and thought about it?

In the end, badgering her about not getting an abortion will only add to any guilty feelings she has whether or not she has the baby. If she has it and regrets it, she might be resentful towards you for pushing her to do something she didn't want to do. And if she has the abortion, the pressure you put on her could very well make her depressed. I say, just support her. She knows how you feel. Now just let her know she's loved

Answer 3

These are the facts of life, I'm sorry if you think they are harsh. Once the girl is pregnant, you are at her mercy as to what she wants to do. She obviously doesn't want to be a mom, so there's no point in talking her out of it unless you want to encourage her to give the baby up for adoption.

No woman knows ahead of time how she's going to feel after she has an abortion until she has one. So you can't know how she's going to feel after having an abortion. Some women feel relief and are glad they did it, some feel regret, it is a very personal issue.

I'm sorry you are upset about this, but the best way to protect yourself from this in the future is to protect yourself. Always use a condom regardless of what other type of BC is being used or don't have sex until you are in a committed relationship with someone who wants to have children with you.

and yeah, even though you didn't ask, you're relationship with this girl is probably over.

Answer 4

A fetus is slightly one however. If she conceived in the final 3 days you may circulate to the drugstore and ask for something referred to as "plan B" it rather is a tablet you're taking and it will terminate the being pregnant previously you're truly pregnant, if it rather is clever to you. An abortion can regularly reason important injury emotionally and actual however, it could make it very perplexing to conceive a baby later and you will consistently have that guilt on your heart and recommendations which will reason a great number of issues. you're being an exceptionally terrible boyfriend however, asserting that if she would not get an abortion you will go away her is an exceptionally cowardly and stupid element so which you would be able to do. in case you probably did not opt for a baby in the 1st place you employ a condom!

Answer 5

I don't get what you mean by she's going to act like she's 17. Just because you're older doesn't mean you're more mature. There are 15 year olds that keep their babies and 35 year olds that don't.

Have her talk to some people that have had abortions. She can message me if she wants. I had an abortion three years ago and I still regret it every day.

Answer 6

You need to help pay for the abortion and get the hell away from her. If you convince her to have the baby, you are going to have a custody nightmare for 18 years.

I would like to see the baby go up for adoption, but if she is adamant about abortion, make sure she has it done and then erase her from your life.

I also recommend you both get sterilized. Neither of you is responsible or you wouldn't be having sex and making babies. I don't want either of you to be parents, ever again. I don't think I want you to pass your selfish natures on to your offspring.

Answer 7

Wow, this is a tough one. Do her parents know she's pregnant? I'm really sorry you are in this situation because honestly there is nothing you can do. It sucks. On one hand yes, it is HER body, but it's your baby too. Once the baby is born you have as much responsibility as she does, so why doesn't that responsibility start at conception? It's a hard standard. Please just be there for her, tell her you'll support her no matter what, and if she goes ahead and gets the abortion, and you can't deal with it, move on. It's sick and I really hope things work out for you.

Answer 8

Well this is difficult because if she wants a abortion it's her choice.
Try telling her that if she has the baby you'll look after it. Also get her to go on www.abortions.com because it's pretty awful. There is a video of what happens to the baby on there and it might put her off.
Tell her to read about some of the rare consequences like it can damage your ovaries so you may never get pregnant.

Answer 9

I would say that all you can do is make sure she knows you will be there for her no matter what. Reassure her that you will help support the baby and you won't leave her because of the baby. Just keep doing like your doing and tell her about the guilt and how it affects you both emotionally and physically. Good luck to the both of you.

Answer 10

i think you need to sit her down let her know how you feel let her know you love her and your not gonna leave so there is no reason to run away from being pregnant...let her know how excited you are and how much this means to you to be a father even though your both young it can be done!!

yes that law is stupid that says its hear choice I'm glad to hear she is a guy that is willing to take responsibility for his actions

if you have to get her to talk to some one any one...your 100% right when you say about her living w/ the regret forever!
good luck i hope to see your next post about being a father!


EDIT:
def have her watch the video that xxciarahxx's posted omg i had to turn it off i was in tears and kinda sick...that is so sad but that is what will happen if she choises an abortion

Answer 11

maybe you could find a counciler to talk to the two of you together. I think it says a lot of your character to want this child to come, but she may not be as open about this as you are. She is looking at all that she will loose, and she is right to do this, but the best thing for you to get through to her is to find someone outside of the relationship to mediate a communication between the two of you. She sees you as the person that put her in the position and not saying that this is your fault but try to view it from her angle then talk to her from there. She will be a lot easier to talk to if you approach her with the mentality that she has, then find out why she wants to just give it up. If she is afraid of loosing her life talk about adoption. There are many other options.