Okay, well I am 17 years old and I have been with my guy for about 10 months now. We got engaged 4 months into the relationship and I just found out 2 months ago that I am pregnant. He is a very responsible guy and pretty much what every girl hopes for. We moved up the date to be married to February '08, is this a smart idea in your opinion?
2007-12-02 17:28:02 · 19 answers · asked by Cynthia 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Okay, well I am 17 years old and I have been with my guy for about 10 months now. We got engaged 4 months into the relationship and I just found out 2 months ago that I am pregnant. He is a very responsible guy and pretty much what every girl hopes for. We moved up the date to be married to February '08, is this a smart idea in your opinion?
Also, I should add: He is 22, going to college for medical school, we wanted to get married before the baby we just moved up the date and yes we are getting married for love, and the program that he is getting into is going to give us a place to stay and pay for it while we are there with all the loans he is getting, obviously we have to pay all that money back but when he completes school it will be no problem.
2007-12-03 00:00:21 · update #1
NO !!! You are too young, you are just starting your life and havent even got out of high school yet, and you havent even been with the guy for more than a year. You dont know everything about him, you cant in less than a year, what is wrong with you. A child is alot of work, have fun taking care of the baby by yourself while he is out with his buddies. Your relationship wont last.
2007-12-02 17:38:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Instead of giving you advice I'm going to tell you a story. My nephew and his girlfriend purposely got pregnant. Both were 16 and SO in love. My brother was so angry that he didn't talk to my nephew for months. My sister-in-law finally talked my brother into giving a little as it is his grandchild. Well the baby was born, it was a boy. Oh wow now the kids are parents living with my brother and sister-in-law. Playing house, going to school, no job, no insurance, no nothing! Oh but things are great. The mother of the baby after a few months decided that she didn't want the baby and left it with my nephew. He turned out to be the GREATEST dad!! She hasn't seen the baby since he was about 2 1/2. He's almost 6. Now she calls up thanksgiving and says that the guy she was cheating with is getting out of the military soon and he wants a DNA test. Wow what a way to miss up a little boy and the MAN who has raised him. SELFISH Little witch. See how fast things change. Get an education so that you can support that baby on your own if you need to. Yes you can get a divorce if it doesn't work out. But think of yourself and the baby. Just in case that there is a divorce get the education so that you don't have to struggle to support the two of you and if nothing else it will help your future husband support the household. Good Luck Sweetie, you're going to need it!
2007-12-02 18:04:38 · answer #2 · answered by witchywoman 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its so hard to say because honestly I feel that you are too young to get married. Marriage is one of those things that you have to go into with your whole heart and all of your mind and I just don't feel that this is the right thing for you to do. I think that the best thing for you to do is focus on being healthy for your child. Put your self in the mindset that from now on you are going to have to live for your child because being a mother while rewarding and God honestly one of the best things on the world, is also very trying and stressful, complicated, emotionally and physically draining and is a job that will never ever end even when that child is an adult. So focus on getting your education because you will need it in order to get a good job, focus on your mental health because again this is going to be a tough time for you because you are so young and being a mother is not easy for 40 yr old women so i cannot imagine how you will handle it but you can you just got to work hard. I don't think you should worry about getting married right now and the tone of your question does not feel like you are sure that this is what you want to do. I wish you good luck though in any decision that you make.
2007-12-02 17:46:10 · answer #3 · answered by GLAM GIRL WEDDING PLANNER 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I got married at 18, but not because I was pregnant. Now we've been married for almost 3 years and I wish I could say things are going wonderfully, and give you encouragement, but after my experience all I can say is to wait. Wait until you have figured out what you want to do with your life and you have experienced some of the things you want to experience, and let him do the same. Go to college, travel, and just have fun because being married, you will not have those opportunities so easily!
2007-12-02 21:14:34 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you are only 17, are you still living with your parents? I say sense you are both young, try living with each other first for awhile. It's only been 10 mo. Talk about the baby and what both of your ideas are of how to raise him/her. If he is as great as you say, you will still be married later on. Don't get married at a sooner date just because you are pregnant. You will be married anyway, why does it matter if you move the date up or not. I say wait just a little bit first.
Good Luck with your marriage and your baby.
2007-12-02 17:50:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm hoping it works out for you. Although getting married this young is going to pose big problems. First, where are you going to live? What about money/jobs? Just don't get married because of the baby. Get married because this is someone you can see yourself with forever. If you get married for all the right reasons, then go for it.
2007-12-02 17:38:09 · answer #6 · answered by revjojelp06@sbcglobal.net 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well i think you should wait i got pregnant at 17 to.and waited to get married until i was 18 because we moved in together and everything was different you are not the same people you should live together for at least a year.i would rather be married because i love the guy and know him truly then to be married because of a pregnancy.
2007-12-02 18:17:23 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
not knowing you i would say that
YES this is a stupid idea.. you are simply too young and you are throwing your life away..
but having said that
every situation is different and this could be the right thing for you .. and if it isnt , then you will learn from your mistakes
you need to think long and hard about it
and if deep down this is still what you REALLY want to do
then do it
remember, things change when you get married and ecsepcially when you have a baby.
2007-12-02 17:36:00 · answer #8 · answered by j.d 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Have you fully considered your options? Adoption, abortion and keeping it? If you're certain you want to have this baby and raise it yourself, that's fine, but you don't need to marry him so quickly. You're too young and you hardly know the guy! You see him as perfect, what every girl hopes for. That's actually a huge warning sign to tread carefully. Take it slow. Worry about the pregnancy right now and the baby and in a few years, think about marriage.
2007-12-02 17:38:29 · answer #9 · answered by some female 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
unfortunately the statistics are against it working out. at such a young age you will no doubt have money problems (a huge cause of many divorces) neither of you have had much experiencing dating and cheating is also a large cause for divorce. also as you are growing older each year you will be maturing in different ways. you may not like the adult version of each other. you will be home with the baby and he may want to go out with his buddies who will no doubt be picking up on girls and that can lead to a frustration for him as he sees his freedom is gone
i do wish you all the best if you do go through with it.
2007-12-02 17:33:01 · answer #10 · answered by jezbnme 6 · 3⤊ 1⤋