Do you know any good,not rude, Chritmas jokes?
2007-12-02 09:33:26 · 14 answers · asked by ASK A.S. 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Holidays ➔ Christmas
knock knock
who's there
rude
rude who
rudolph the red-nose...you know
2007-12-02 09:37:51 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
K. This one has a postman.
A mailman goes to deliver the mail at this one house. Before he can put the mail in the box, a woman open the front door and says, "Hi, mailman. Come on in." So he does.
Then he notices that this VERY good looking woman is wearing only a teddy, and darn near see-through.
"I have prepared a breakfast for you," the woman says. The mailman sit down to toast, eggs, bacon, sausages, hashbrowns, pancakes with butter and syrup, orange juice, and milk.
Well, he's sitting there, puzzled, drinking his second cup of coffee, talking with this delightfully witty women, and she says all of the sudden, "Would you like to make love with me?"
"Well. . .yes!!" he says. And off they go into her bedroom for an hour and a half of the hottest sex the mailman has ever even imagined. They are lying there and he says, "Wow, lady. I really appreciate this. But what's it all about?"
"Well," she said, "I was talking with my husband about all the people we should give Christmas bonuses to and I said, 'What about the mailman?' My husband said, 'Screw the mailman.' The breakfast was my idea."
2007-12-02 17:41:05 · answer #2 · answered by Sarrafzedehkhoee 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do elves learn at school?
The Elf-abet
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
FrostBite
What does a cat on a beach have in common with xmas?
Sandy Claws
What's brown and sneaks around the kitchen?
Mince Spies
How does Jack Frost travel to work?
By Icicle
What do you get if you eat xmas decorations?
Tinselitus
That's all i can think of for now
2007-12-02 17:42:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Q: Why did Santa start a garden?
A: So he can hoe, hoe, hoe!
Q: Why did the snowman stay home from work?
A: Because he got a hot.
(Get it? People get colds, but snowmen get hots because they're already cold!)
That's all I got. The second one is lame, but the first one is cute, right?!
=)
2007-12-02 17:43:12 · answer #4 · answered by Samantha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The three wise men are entering the stable and one bangs his head on the ceiling. He yells "Fuckin'Jesus Christ!". Mary says "That's a good name. We were going to call him Fred."
2007-12-02 17:39:05 · answer #5 · answered by zee_prime 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
here is a link to a website with some christmas jokes
http://www.santas.net/christmasjokes.htm
hope this helps
2007-12-02 17:36:52 · answer #6 · answered by Bill B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
what is black and white and red all over? Santa coming down a chimney!
2007-12-02 17:35:38 · answer #7 · answered by redheadedwonder11 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No. Definately not. I don't do hoilday jokes.
2007-12-02 17:38:02 · answer #8 · answered by Bixenta Lenore Abraxas 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
never eat any yellow snow cones
2007-12-02 17:37:20 · answer #9 · answered by Claude D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope.
2007-12-02 17:35:26 · answer #10 · answered by julie b 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋