What is the acceptable age difference in dating, before you raise your eyebrows?

Question

Let's assume anybody over 25 years old.

Ipodlady: My first non-serious "boyfriend" was 17 when I was 13, so it happens LOL

Josh: I like "aint hateful, just greatful"...that's how I feel about older men

Answer 1

Adding the 'everyone is over 25' condition makes this an easy one to answer completely!

Under those circumstances, I wouldn't raise my eyebrows, at all. What, none of you have ever seen 'Harold and Maude'?

More than 20 years difference, I may shrug, but those dynamics are easy to explain. Less than ten, and I wouldn't even notice.

At the 30 yo, 40 yo, and 50 yo marks, the difference becomes less note-able, due to the proportion of actual age represented.

So, as a rule, over 25 years of age, 20% age difference (of the oldest's age) is mainly insignificant, up to, but not limited by, one decade difference.

That's my story and I'm stickin to it.

P.S., nice to see you around, Ms. L. Hope you and yours had and will have great holiday(s).

Answer 2

Anna Nicole Smith married a guy decades older than her and I sure raised my eyebrows. As far as I'm concerned she was a gold digger of the first water and no one will ever convince me to believe she didn't take advantage of guy on the borderline of dementia. My niece married a guy two years older than her dad and they have wonderful relationship but they had a few rough years before everyone excepted that he was not taking advantage of a young woman.

To each his own but anything over 15 years difference is the set point that seems to raise eyebrows and make people take a second look at the relationship.

By the way, my brother married a woman 15 years younger and at age 50 she is sitting in a nursing home with full blown Alzheimer's. Life is unpredictable.

Answer 3

The older you are the more acceptable. Eyebrows would go up if a 20 year old was dating a 16 year old. But not if a 40 year old was dating a 36 year old. I am 14 years older than my wife. But we didnt meet till I was in my late 40s. But the year I graduated high school, she was starting kindergarten. Her grandparents were 18 years apart. You just wouldnt want to see a 90 year old with an 18 year old. Age is just numbers, you need to go by maturity

Answer 4

well as you stated starting at age 25 I think its ok to go up 7- 9 years however after 30 you can go up 10 and by 35 you can go up higher without the eyebrows being raised. From what I have seen the older you get the less the difference really is.
I married at 22 to a man 6 years older than me not one person raised their brows at us we just got a lot of "its about time".

Answer 5

I think it is more of a ratio and stage of life than an exact age difference. For example I think that more than 3 years while teenagers is a bit much just because of maturation levels. When people get into their 20's I think about 7 years is the max, after than 10 and once you hit mid 40's I think a 20 year difference would be okay. There are always exceptions but I think this is usually a generally acceptable.

Answer 6

Wow, that's a loaded question!

I'm not going to kid you: I've dated women both significantly older and younger than myself. With that in mind, I'd have to say that it's not so much the age, but rather the maturity of both people that should dictate whether it's "eyebrow-raising" or not.

I've dated women who were nearly 10 years older than myself, and found myself the adult in the relationship; that said, I've also dated women 10 years younger and found a thoroughly enjoyable companion that shared many of my interests and passions, resulting in many a delightful evening at art galleries, concerts, plays (you get the picture)....

So don't worry too much about the age, but instead make sure that the person you're showing interest in is someone who shares things in common with you, someone you can share experiences with.

Answer 7

I would be most likely to raise my eyebrows at it if they were <75% of your age or >35%. For example if you are 30 I wouldn't think anything if your range was early 20s to 40.

That doesn't mean that I would think anything bad about you if you dated a man older than 40 but as a practical matter if he is older you just would have less in common and be at different points in your lives. I think that the life differences and what you are happy with is more important not a specific number.

Edit: my bf is older than me but in our case I think the age difference is real but not an eyebrow raise (at least to me) because I think we are both good people who are good for each other. :)

Answer 8

After the age of 18, I say 10 years.

Answer 9

I've seen people in relationships with 20+ years differences, and it really does not concern me. If the relationship only involves consensual adults, I could care less and it's none of my business.

I personally prefer older men.. And not just a 5 or 6 year difference. Not a 20 year difference either though, maybe about 10 for me.

Answer 10

It really depends on the age. Two years can be a huge difference or very little difference depending on the age. E.g no one would care if a 22 year old and a 24 year old dated, but if a 16 and an 18 year old dated, someone would do jail time.

I think over the age of 20, anything in excess of 4-5 years is too much, but then, as age increases, the age difference becomes more acceptable in my opinion.